Fat Henry, BTS

21 Tuesday Jan 2020

Tags

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FH3

Dear Friends of Jano,

Its 2020, and yep its a whole new decade….*insert flashbacks and existential episode here.
FUCK.

You ever come back from a vacation and you have issues readjusting to life, when you already were bleh about it anyway? That has legit been me since I came back from the southern part of Florida. If you ever get a chance to check out Sanibel Island, do it. Industrialization has for the most part has not touched this part of the world. It is legit so beautiful.

Whats not so beautiful is the racism I experienced while in Cape Coral. Shit was repulsive.

Dear White People, Your logic of ignoring a black customer while having a black coworker is foolish. One day you are going to fuck with the wrong one, and I hope to hear about it on the news.

Anyway. Here I am weeks later on typing this issue finally. Like I said readjusting has been hard, as is finding the words to write this. This isn’t an actual major issue, at least for me. For lack of better words this is a filler issue….like some other issues.

But Jano, what is a filler?

Well if you are asking that you obviously don’t watch anime. A filler is an adventure is detailed that is unrelated, or tangential, to the main story arc(s).

In this case, the main arc is the collection of my “Infinity Stones”, which at this point still is 2 remaining photo shoots that have yet to occur. Although this may not be essential to my journey, sharing this would be helpful for another creative.

Who remembers my friend England Simpson? If that name sounds familiar then I really fuck with you, because she has been the subject of a few of my issues at this point. If not well, go read some back issues.

At some point in 2018, she had told me that my place would be a perfect place to film a movie.I told her she could as long as she paid me, she said of course. Time went by, like nearly 2 years really and she told me she is gonna do it the 1st weekend of October of 2019.

Side note, this issue actually takes place before the events of my first art show. Usually I do things chronologically but I was excited as fuck to talk about it.

At any rate we made preparations, and she came by one Sunday morning. She arrived probably 930 -10ish. I legit had no idea long of a day it was gonna be, I didn’t but whatever its happening now so I would find out. They arranged my living room to how they wanted it, prepped the actors, props and did script reads.

I stayed out the way since my only part was to provide a place for part of the movie to be filmed. I joked with her Sisters, read the rest of Grave Destiny and started reading AfroFuturism….which I still need to finish actually. One of the photographers showed me his work, plus showed me the capabilities of one my lenses. Honestly that was probably the best part.

The worst part tho….nigga…..

So, there was a person who catered the event. Which was ok because you know food is a necessary thing….but what isn’t necessary is this bloated bare foot lady horrendous foot odor. OMFG.

NIGGA!!!

NIGGAAAAA!!!!!!!

At various points I would walk from the living room to my room, passing the kitchen in the mean time and I would catch a whiff of something. I wasn’t sure what it was but I knew I didn’t like it. At some point in the afternoon this pasty land whale sat in the living room on one of my couches, and when she descended as did the foul smell that was in tow from her toes. OMG that shit right there, that shit right there made me escape my own living room. I don’t know if escape rooms are that easy but spoiler alert that day it was. To add insult to injury this bulbous blob big bitch took the top to one of my pots, which I didn’t realize until a few weeks later.

OMG Jano, how could you say all this?

Because it actually happened, spoiler alert.

Other than the stinky gender bent version of Blob, the day was pretty chill. Not gonna lie at some point I was thinking I need you niggas to get the fuck out of my house. If I didn’t have to work early it wouldn’t be such an issue, but 336 am comes early sadly. UGH.

The whole thing ended around 11ish. They left the house in the same manner they found it clean…minus the top of my pot. I feel like Captain Ahab and hunting me a fucking whale.

Dear White people, don’t pollute houses with your unclean appendages and steal shit like your fucking ancestors did.

ANYWAY.

For a description and a trailer of the movie which called Fat Henry, click here. To see some of the behind the scenes images go here.

Not gonna lie, I had no idea what was this movie was about even though it was being filmed in my house.

No clue, no such clues existed.

But I did get paid, which help fund my prints for my my first art show.

Moral of the Story… other than white people be the worse sometime?

I have no clue, decipher one for yourself and let me know or not.

Kinda wanna keep typing, but I also wanna keep staring at this Lava Lamp and pass out. Like I said 336 am comes fast and early.

Azuma Kara

09 Saturday Nov 2019

Posted by janoryusaru in Uncategorized

≈ 2 Comments

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AK38

Dear Friends of Jano,

First and fucking foremost, I am legit upset that I didn’t get superpowers from this spider bite on my leg. The only thing I got is 1. immense fragging pain 2. probably a huge bill for going to the Emergency Room for the first time in years, and 3. I didn’t get to wear my Vegeta costume that I ordered for Halloween last year, but didn’t arrive until after aforementioned Holiday because I was passed out in pain. NO NIGGA WE AIN’T YEETING HERE.

Maybe later in this issue but at this current point, nope this is a yeet free zone.

Anyway.

So for those who have not been paying attention on any of my social media channels and never clicked on my about me page. The picture above is of me, and I just did my first art show. I know right I am a pretty dude, and thank youuuuuu.

The lead up to this was legit unexpected but deeply appreciated it.

Side note, to avoid the excessive use of pronouns I will be referring to some people by their IG names.

So September day whilst I was picking cotton, well making sure the cotton was up to par before it got sent out to random cunts who I’ll probably never meet. One of the field slaves I shuck and jive with, PurpleKloudz, randomly started talking, ya know about anime, art, dreams to be chased and nigga shit. He was telling me how one of his goals was to be in an art show before the year is over, I was like yooooo go ahead and follow your dreams. As the convo went on,I found out it was an anime and art show that he was going to be in.

Hold up, I like anime and I’m an artist. The voices of my ancestors told me I needed to be part of this. Spoiler Alert, When the voices of your ancestors speak you listen, always.

I asked him for more details and how I could be a part of it, he said he would talk to our other slave we shuck and jive with for the scraps master give us, JohnnyLovely.

Look I get it, I am laying it on thick with the slave cotton field references, but I legit work in a plantation that contains majority cotton so I am allowed to say these things. Hella allowed, especially since this is my damn site.

Anyway.

So at some point after a day of picking cotton, me and both of the aforementioned fellow slaves had a nerd gathering in the parking lot. Thats where it went down. YEET YEET.

JohnnyLovely told me about how this is the second anime and art show that his friend was having. I asked could I show any of my pieces, and he was like ummmm idk. Fuck it, I’ll try anyway and I did. He gave me the information of the person who was orchestrating the event. I sent him the links to all of my galleries, ALL of my galleries. Need a reminder, no problem. Starting from oldest to the most recent we have Miasmic Emancipation, Velvet Sweaters,Numinously Noir, Emerald Evisceration and oh yeah my house party invites just for good measure.

And he said I was in. YEET YEET NIGGA. Actually Yeet didn’t really do justice for how excited I was, especially when you hear people saying you shouldn’t draw the things you draw. Well fuck you naysayers, especially those I am genetically linked to.

The next step was to choose which images I wanted to display. Eventually I chose the 3 below.

creep-2

torment1

Private Party1_edited-1

Yep that last one was def chosen. Not gonna lie the process was hard. When it was all said and done,I hit up one of my friends I use to pick cotton with at another field a few years ago. I asked him would he mind printing out my images for the show, and he said sure. It was going good but due to the amount of colors I use in my drawings, I kinda killed his blue printhead. Yea, I wasn’t expecting that. So for images 2 and 3, I had to go to Office Max to get those printed out. Pretty sure they were confused and concerned about what I had them make.

As if I give a fuck, Spoiler Alert I don’t.

I got my frames and bam, I was all set.Since I finally got my images printed and frame I could actually start posting ads for it on social media. The last thing I wanted to do was post I was going to be in an art show and not have my stuff ready. The day before I met with the organizer of the show, and briefly dropped off the above pieces along with some small ones I had made when I did the pop art show in 2017. I got home, did my hair because my hair was an arid dry mess, and passed the fuck out.

The day of the show came, and I wish I requested off. I was excited, legit excited as fuck. Me and my girl left the cotton field, grabbed food from Chick Fil A, and went back to my place. I changed first then she did. Joy is when you get to wear a shirt you ordered a month ago for the first time at a kool event that you are in.While she did I meditated, because sometimes you got to do that before something major in your life is about to happen. On the way there I legit was trying to find a song to amp me, this is the bad thing about primary listening to somber music. I did find some pleasure in Rapsody’s Nina and Cleo and J.Cole’s Middle Child. In hindsight I wish I remembered Awerooh’s- Its My turn now, that was my shit, 3 years ago when I was developing my website.

Eh, maybe next time.

We got to Camp North End, did a brief photoshoot before we headed to the event. Yo, real shit I am legit awkward in front of a camera, I am. Yea I take selfies but full body poses aren’t a thing I’m use to doing, even though I tell others what to do when I am behind the lens. The event didn’t start until 7, but I wanted to be there to see the set up process and place flyers for my site, and a copy of my book series for people to view.

The night flew by after that honestly. Lush Lofi flowed in the background,feeling as if I was in an episode of Samurai Champloo. Her and I walked around for a while at some point we saw our fellow slaves who were also having their art exhibited, the one’s told me about the show. As the night went on, I was both the subject and the usual detached observer while I took photos of the event. Its a weird feeling since I am never am the subject of an event.

I promise sometimes I feel like I am the unborn child of Samantha White and Lionel Higgins from Dear White People.

Our other slave friends showed up, and we were all like AWWW SHIT NIGGA. She helped get people to look at book, Yaaaaaaas honey Yaaaaaaas. In case anyone hasn’t noticed I’m shy as shit, so her amping me up defiantly helped my spirit. My friend who printed one of my images came with his wife and daughter, and at some point the 5 of us walked around. Eventually we doubled back to the event and they head out.

Another slave showed up, who I met in an odd way. Well not really odd considered the digital word we live in. We work at the same place, but our first interaction was when she liked a post I did of me starting a book on AfroFuturism by YTasha L. Womack.

I still need to finish that book.

At the time I didn’t know who she was, until one day at work I was stopped and she was like I think I liked your post. Oh shit, wasn’t ready. The convo couldn’t last long because if masta see’s us lil field niggas not picking his cotton we gets in bigs trouble, and we don’t wants no trouble.

But Jano, how is this relevant to the story?

I’m about to get to that, impatient ass.

She showed up with her daughter, and she was thoroughly impressed with the pieces that me and our fellow field slaves had to put up. From the perspective that we had worked hard to create something, and going to the extra effort of making our work being seen to the public something that some people hesitate to do. The fact that the artist space was primarily created by and for black artist thrilled her more. Thrilled her to the point that she felt inspired to do something similar and create an AfroFuturism con here in Charlotte.

Now you get the relevance.

Oh shit, that would be awesome. I’ve been hoping to do shows especially black themed sci fi art shows, it would be an added bonus if there was one here in Charlotte. Hopefully this will manifest into something flourishes, heavily.

The night trickled on, at some point there was a group photo taken of me and the other artist. Still awkward as hell for me to pose, so fucking awkward. After that me and some of the people I pick cotton with went on to go play Cards Against Humanity. I bounced back to the event to get my prints, at some point the dude who organized all this said there would be another one in March. Nigga I’m so down.

And thats it. I was talking with JohnnyLovely a few times before the day of the show. At some point he said a black art renaissance is heading towards Charlotte, and after this I can see it happening. Another conversation, I made reference to Dear White People, how after the Black Face Party there were a series of events that occurred after and it affected everyone differently. My ancestors say that both of our feelings are accurate. Was this event an adequate save point and it will propel me into another direction that will benefit me greatly or will I stagnate and float on in a void of despair?

Spoiler Alert, either result will be chronicled here as usual.

Hopefully this clearing will lead to an oasis that splinters many paths of abundance. In the meantime to see photos from the even go here.

Pretty sure this was a big save point in my art journey. Speaking of save points I’m gonna resume from the one in Final Fantasy 7 and hopefully beat it before the year is over. Also next issue we will go back to the regular flowing timeline. This was an omg I need to talk about it now so my spirit can go back to chill mode, and I have.

Restarts ChillMode.exe

DAMN IT RYUSARU!! GET ME PICTURES OF SILK!!

12 Monday Aug 2019

Posted by janoryusaru in Uncategorized

≈ 3 Comments

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AxFSyDue

Dear Friends of Jano,

This has been a sporadic and slaveful as summer,at least for me. FUCK. Kanye West Spaceship is legit playing both in my head and on my Spotify Can my Azure Ascendance spaceship come in and so I can fly away and do art things instead.

Anyway.

This saga actually isn’t complicated, compared to some of the others I’ve shared. Its just more so a matter of waiting.

It literally started Spring 2017 with a white girl.

But Jano, how did it go from white girl to your friend we have seen model for you 3 times who clearly isn’t white?

Well if you shut the fuck up you will find out :).

At some point in Spring 2017 when I was unemployed as fuck, yep that unemployment streak that started January 2016. MAN that was an arduous time.

Anyway.

I random white girl followed me on IG. At the time I was not posting anything on any social media platform. At the time my mindset I wasn’t gonna post anything until I got a full time job finally…

HA I was foolish.

Anyway because of that some of the most recent things I posted were photos of cosplay images. She DM’d me saying she would like to do a cosplay shoot, and me at the time who has not done one yet was down.

What followed was a series of events that made me more so loose patience with humanity, more so.

For those who weren’t paying attention, I wasn’t employed at the time.Employment didn’t happen until mid April and lasted until Early June. Followed by me being unemployed for 2 weeks, working for a month, then unemployed again until September. All of which, except for the 1st weekend of new slavery, I had the weekends off.

I would hit her up multiple times, and yet despite it being her idea she was never available. I appreciated her actually replying but at the same time I was irked. From the time period of Mid July to September, asking became ridiculous. She would tell me that she had alot going on, but then her IG stories would have a caption of going to meet a photographer. Days later it would be photos up of her in the outfit from the IG stories from said photographers.

Ya’ll listen, the older I get the less fucks I give.

Spoiler Alert.

I’m not gonna continue to chase people down for something that was their idea. I’m not.That mindset translate into a lot of things these days. I don’t have the time nor patience from it.

If you have an idea that you want done, and you don’t make an effort to make it happen. I.E. if I keep asking and the only thing you tell me is you’ll let me know, I’ll let it go.

As I let this go.

Summer 2017 was more hectic than I planned in terms of model searching. Finding models for Graveyard Craft, Schoolgirl Craft, Masquerade day, and and a fucking mermaid was a legit an Rpg type journey.

So….many…..side ….quest…..

During the mermaid saga when I finally had my model solidified. I told my homegirl about the aforementioned treachery, and she told she would do a cosplay photoshoot for me.

So let me publicly gush for once. She is legit my favorite model out of all the people I worked with.

Spoiler Alert.

She is, she drove down to help me out multiple times to help me fulfill my art dreams and was willing to do it again. I’m sorry none of you others can compare to her at all. Some of you may be mad, but I don’t give a fuck. If I actually get to shoot any of them more than once for another idea of mine I will be surprised. So to my homegirl I want to say you are the best, and I’m glad we met at that winter comic convention in 2013. Whenever I see you again I owe you food for all the times you helped when I was unemployed, plus you left your brush here.

Tender moments are over.

Back to this journey.

Even though she had agreed to help me out, it wasn’t that a simple thing. No major reason, just schedule conflicts. We both were working retail, and even when my schedule switched to weekend availability in the Spring of 2018 she still wasn’t able to make it down. Which sucked because I did have an idea to do it during the Spring while the trees were blooming new leaves for the year after a frigid callous winter.

Eventually August 2018, it happened after the original agreement was formed in September 2017. The day came and she arrived at my house, it took a minute before we actually did the shoot. I was recovering from a lush filled night, ironically enough when I did the masquerade shoot it was the day after I drank on a Sunday in August too.

Eh.

She prepared herself make up wise, while I got my equipment ready. I drove to downtown where I envisioned this happening. The weather was perfect, as in I didn’t have to worry about her dying from heat exhaustion. It was a cloudy chill day so neither of us would sweat our spirits away.

Nothing extraordinary happened. She knew more about the character than I do, so my usual look at Pintrest for posing ideas was useless. The only other things that happened was that children thought that she was kool and wanted pictures with her. There was this one nigga, who was exactly that a nigga. I regret letting him take a photo with her, his last words were that picture will get ya’ll famous.

Negro please I didn’t even edit that nonsense.

I reject thou niggatry with the greatest power of the force.

Anyway.

We ended the shoot since she hadn’t eaten all day. We had talked about doing a night shoot but that didn’t happen. Partially because I was afraid it would be a repeat of what happened in Incandescent Spirits, the other half was because niggas were tired as fuck. OMG, I really need to start stretching before I shoot people I do.

At any rate, we went to get something to eat. She introduced me to Poke’bowls and Poke’ Burritoes. OMFG, they are so great. Blessed Be Korean food. We went back to my house and hung out, while she played her favorite songs.

Ugh, I just remembered how she played that foolishness of Kanye West Lift Yourself…OMG. I legit didn’t think it was him, and I’m upset I heard it.. A far from cry from Spaceship I mentioned earlier.

Someone save Kanye from Kanye

SMH.

At any rate to see the images from that day click here.

On another note, this is actually the photoshoot I did of 2018. Not by choice, not by choice at all. As far “Infinity Stones” go, at this point I have 3 of the 6 I am determined to get. Other shoots were supposed to happen, but ya know life and peoples fickleness.

Moral of the story, Don’t trust white girls who slide and your DM’s. As well don’t chase anyone down when it is their idea.

Next issue will take place in 2019. I am almost caught up with time…or something…whatever…..

WOOT Tomorrow I go see Kota the Friend perform.

YEET.

Jano Out.

Gummy Rose

01 Saturday Jun 2019

Posted by janoryusaru in Uncategorized

≈ 3 Comments

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Dear Friends of Jano,

Damn its that time of year again. Time for that nigger heat, the heat that oppressed my ancestors my ancestors in the times of slavery.

FUUUUCK!!!!!

*deep breath

So this issue is a lengthy one. Longer than the mermaid saga. This saga started September 2017 and ended June 2018.

Riiiiight.

So we are gonna skip how I don’t know how I feel about the series finale of Game of Thrones. Thats who rules over Westeros?? Never would have thought, even though apparently there were signs according to all the recent theories Google feels the need to suggest to me.

Anyway, make sure your wifi is on for this. It is a whole anime arc.

The saga of the summer projects ended, and the feeling was comparable to how the calm after big anime boss battles. Need examples that put your favorite heroes through hell, sure. Togoru, Sensui, Freeza, Majin Buu, The Dark Moon Clan, Lady Debonair, Mistress 9, Doflamingo, Apocalypse, Thanos, The Night King,Shredder (Not the 1990’s cartoon one, he was a joke), need I go on.

Niggas were exhausted, more so mentally than physically. I was over the whole model search and legit just wanted to chill, finish act 2 of my book series, play video games and beat my meat in bliss. Ya know simple shit.

That legit didn’t last long.

At some point in September a friend I use to pick cotton with at my least favorite plantation, (Ikea for those who don’t know my life), hit me up. He told me about a girl that he thought would be a good model for me. He sent me her IG profile and I agreed.

Honestly at this point in time I had no idea what I wanted to bring to life, legit didn’t. The only thing saw artistically was inking act 2 of Azure Ascendance, nothing else mattered. Never the less I messaged her and tried to think of a concept and a possible location.

I didn’t have shit. None, No such shit existed.

I would scroll on my IG timelines and would lean toward flowery and Japanese themes. At some point I even went to Plato’s Closet to browse for possible things I may want to use. We would communicate during this process, I know this sounds vague in contrast to my usual vivid details but this part of the saga is a blur to me. Maybe it was because I didn’t have clue where the fuck I was going, or maybe it was because the job I just started after not working for 9 weeks was having me wake up early as fuck to set up for halloween fuckery.

Yay.

But one day I found a path to follow, and man it was a fucking path that will probably take a few hours to type. First google The Black Tape Project, go ahead I’ll wait.

This project has actually been in existence since 2013. When I saw it years ago I thought the concept was pretty kool and wanted to do something similar to it. Legit forgot all about it until one September day when I saw something pop on IG. In that moment abstract ideas I previously had amalgamated into one grand idea.

And when it did she stopped replying to my messages. Of course.

Jano, did you chase her down for this idea?

Nigga fuck no. After the war of summer 2017 my spirit no longer has no urge to chase people down who don’t want to be part of my life or art journey. She got one email to see if she was still down but after that, nah bruh.

So here I was with this idea with no one to shoot it with. Sadly even though I have mostly female friends, I’m pretty sure none of them would be down for me to cover their bodies in ribbons while being naked in front of me. Spoiler Alert, I’m the cutest loser you will ever meet.

So off to craigslist I go.

Again.

UGH,

I knew what I wanted I wanted a brown, dark skin girl with natural hair. Usually I don’t have a preferred genotype for the ideas I’ve done but this time I did. Replies were scarce as fuck. But before we continue can someone tell me why this white woman replied when I clearly stated that I desire the opposite of her. I even had a picture as an example. NIGGGAAAA!!!!

Dear White People, when I say I want a brown skin female you don’t meet the requirements. Your basic Becky aesthetic can be taken elsewhere.

Anyway at some point that fall I considered one of my coworkers for the part since met the criteria. Since I got a possible model for this project I started the how the fuck am I going to pull this off part, because ya know that is important. First, my homegirl who I shot in the park, let me borrow her eldest daughters cotton candy machine. I actually didn’t use since the shoot took longer to do than expected, and I didn’t want stop her from making cotton candy. Second, since my mermaid cosplay friend, knows the way of cosplay culture I asked her what can I use to adhere ribbons to the skin that won’t cause any type of discomfort. She told me of a spray that I found in hobby lobby one day post cotton field. I tried it on myself while shopping, yea that shit stuck.

I had told my coworker that I needed to get her measurements and I needed to test the spray on her. We attempted to make plans for this to happen, did it tho? Nah, not at all. After several attempts I said fuck it, especially since she told me she had gotten a second job, and ironically the days we planned on something came up.

Spoiler Alert, I’m so over that happening in all avenues of my life.

At this point it is December 2017, and the idea of shooting someone outside who was only ribbon cladded was as dead as the flowers I hoped to capture as a backdrop in this saga. Plus not gonna lie I’m not a cold weather person, not all….unless I’m getting paid. So figured I’d aim to do the shoot in the spring.

The way my life goes it would probably be spring when I found someone.

The search continued. I thought I found a potential one but of course she fizzled out of existence too, honestly there isn’t a point in bringing her up. Another friend who I met during the the mermaid saga, was interested but decided against it for reasons I’m not mad at.

If you give me a legit reason why you don’t want to do a shoot, opposed to just vanishing out of my life after saying you were down I won’t cast stones. Its only when you ghost me do I throw stones, salt, shade and sarcasm. All the painful S’s. Especially if you don’t reply to my message but like my fucking post on social media.

Fast forward to March 2018. One of my homegirls who I shucked and jived with at the plantation wanted to get dinner, we met at Zoe’s Kitchen and talked about how our lives were going. I told her about the shoot I was trying to do, and asked did she have any friends that I may want to shoot for it. She pulled out her phone and showed me her coworker…OMG.

Nigga, I was floored. She was gorgeous, I told her I want her for my bday (no literally my bday was coming up soon) she would be a great gift so I could end this search. She told me she would ask her and man this mystic hybrid was hopeful as fuck. The next time I saw her was at my bday party the following week, and her friend was down.

YAAAAAAAAAAAS.

Blessed Be!! Hail to the guardians of the watch tower.

I got her contact info, and we set up a meeting sometime during the following week.

Real Shit she was kool as fuck. I told her the whole project and was excited. She told me she never modeled before aside from this one thing at college where she was essentially the token black person on the college brochure. I took her measurements, and told her as it warmed up we could start thinking about a date. In the meantime I asked what her favorite type of candy was and liquor choices. She told me gummy bears and was down for any type of spirit consumption. As spring approached I bought a candy dish and a fan off Amazon. In May we met at Hobby Lobby one day post cotton field to see if the ribbons I wanted to use would be a good contrast on her. They won’t. The original intent was pastel colors but they appeared more sheer than anything. I chose 2 variations of the pink and purple I desired.

Side note, I like how after I actual found someone who I wanted and they solidified that they were down things flowed effortlessly.

When we got in the parking lot we talked about a date. She had told me that every Saturday in June she would be off in addition to the Tuesdays she is normally allotted off. We picked the Tuesday the 3rd week of June, and that Saturday as the back up date. In the meantime, my jobs project had ended and I began my 4 months of unemployment.

Not gonna lie,I legit kinda miss being unemployed. All I did was draw, chase my art dreams, eat and sleep in late. Sucks I couldn’t afford to turn on my a/c but I survived….somehow.

Anyway, at some point I fashioned a floral crown from supplies from Party City and Dollar Tree. Yay for the crown making experience points I gained during the mermaid epic. But the cape was a whole different thing. Spoiler alert, I don’t know how to sew, at all. Yay for my homegirls who told me about Hem tape and my cosplay friend who told me about chiffon because my cape may have not existed at all. Rigging the ornament of the cape was the hardest part. As the date came closer she bought a pair of shoes that were way better than anything I could have imagined.

The week came of the shoot FINALLY. OMFG, this took forever. If you think reading this was arduous try living it. That Monday I had called Mcgill Rose Garden to see that there were no events occurring the following day. This garden is legit kool as shit, however it is only open for a few hours a day and it is a popular place people like to have events. The last thing I need is for the background to be loaded with gawking people. That is way more editing than I prefer to do.

They told me no, so the rest of the day I spent buying gummy bears, making a new version of Jano Juice, buying a glass royalty would use and image training on how I wanted the shoot to go and hoped the awkward loss of words that occurred a few weeks prior wouldn’t repeat itself. At some point that night she called me to tell me that we couldn’t do the shoot the next day for a very good reason, her period came.

But Jano why does that matter?

Spoiler Alert, she is going to only be wearing ribbons. Only Ribbons. Pretty sure a females menstrual cycle involves light and heavy blood flow. And from what I heard the first few days are the heaviest, and the last thing that is desired is blood oozing from her while shooting. That is a whole lot of discomfort for her that can be avoided if we rescheduled. So we did for that Saturday. What is a few days compared to several months?

The day before I walked the venue again since I haven’t been there in months, and did the whole visualization thing. My only other hope was that the cops wouldn’t be called on us, that was def a thing last summer. Black people were getting the policed called on them for simple things like living, pretty sure someone would do it if they saw a black girl wearing only ribbons being shot by black photographer with a Black Dynamite Afro for following his dreams if they had the chance. On god my anxiety was high as fuck the night before.

Anyway, the morning came and I did not hear anything from her around the time we were supposed to meet up. My mind started to swell with fear and a million thoughts raced through my head. Was all this for nothing? Would she vanish on me like other models have the past few months? Fuck am I just trash to be thrown away so easily after all?

And those were only the nice thoughts.

I was having another existential crisis similar to what I had the past few months while trying to do other photoshoots, that to this day I still haven’t done 2 of the desired ones. Nigga its June 2019 still have yet to be done, the two aforementioned shoots were conceived October 2017 and January 2018. NIGGA!! A myriad of thoughts clenched my throat leaving me grasping for air, hoping to not drown in an ocean of depression again.

Yea I’m real fucked up and have a trash complex. Yay for conditioning.

Hold on, Let me breath.

FUCK.

I texted her hoping she had just overslept for good reason, and that was the case. The deepest sigh of relief came from me. But we only a had a few hours that the garden would be open. The goal was to be there by the time it opened, mainly to avoid human background traffic. Plus it would be less hot as fuck earlier in the morning, it would still be hot as fuck but not less as fuck. The place opened at 10, and that is when she got to my house around that time. She got to my place, stripped and I applied the ribbons as hastily as I could. There wasn’t any major issues, other than the adhesive getting stuck to me sometimes. I stuck to my design as much as I could, the application wasn’t as neat as desired but I knew I could fix it in photoshop. We got to the venue around 12ish, the place closes at 3.

Luckily barely anyone was there, the few that were there observed proper etiquette of staying the fuck out of our way. I poured her Jano Juice Volume 3 for effect, nice to know I can make good mixed drinks. If this art journey fails maybe I’ll be a bartender. I told her to channel the royal, bad and boujee side she keeps locked away. And she did successfully and elegantly. For someone who never modeled before she did a legit good job. It was worth the wait, of course I would prefer if my ideas didn’t take months to fucking flourish but whatever.

Anyway to see the culmination of my 10 month journey, go here.

*deep breath

That is the end of this epic, I would say saga but I feel epic is more appropriate given the length of time it took to do this. It damn near equated to a whole school year. Since this ribbon concept worked, hopefully I can do it again in another shoot. But will I? No seriously, I have no idea. I def want to but these model searches are so fucking taxing. If you are interested email me, with photos of yourself and please be in Charlotte, N.C.

Moral of the story; keep in touch with your friends from the cotton field they may help you follow your dreams.

Or something, infer what you want from this. Or not. I don’t care.

Thats it for now, I’m going to do something that doesn’t involve typing a narrative for 4 hours, like rewatch Durarara for the fourth time and getting for ConCarolinas.

Yea, I told you this was an epic.

Abandoned Ravens Nest

01 Friday Feb 2019

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Dear Friends of Jano,

Damn its February already, fuck thats wild. But this polar vortex is even wilder, FUCK its so fucking cold when I leave my house to go pick cotton before the freaking sun is up. Its 2019 and I’ve never heard of a polar vortex ever in my life prior to this week. Is this the end of everything??? If it is I hope I get my X-Men Vs Street Fighter game first, it still hasn’t arrived since last issue. GRRRSSSH.

Anyway.

I type this as I breath in Lavender and Peppermint mist from my diffuser, hopefully it will calm me down as I type this.

But Jano Why?

Because 2018 was a fucking existential photographic nightmare. Thats right, as of this issue we are now in 2018 and will be for only 5 issues after this issue. I had so many photographic aspirations and goals last years that went unfulfilled. And here I was thinking that it would be simpler than the concepts I tried to pursue in 2017. Definitely found out there are deeper levels to feeling like trash. But we will get to that later.

As for right now we are gonna flashback to January 2018. My actress homegirl friend England Simpson, wanted to do another birthday photoshoot with her sister like we did in 2017. Her and her sister share the same birthday as Edgar Allen Poe, yes the Edgar Allen Poe. I don’t know why I felt the need to say the Edgar Allen Poe like there is more than one. Fuck its 2019 and I’m going for dramatic effect for no reason. Anyway after our initial convo I started thinking of places where we could shoot at. The first place I thought of was McGill Rose Garden, figured it would be a nice ambiance.

Well it would have been. The original day we were going to do it England was on her deathbed (not really) and since I don’t like the idea of shooting someone when they are not feeling good we postponed it. The new shoot day became that Monday on Martin Luther King Jr Day, but we found out that the rose garden was closed on Mondays.

FUUUUUCK.

Spoiler Alert, I wasn’t that upset.

I scrolled my brain for possible new places and I remembered Stone Jackson Military School. My spirit was hit with so much joy.

But Jano why?

Stone Jackson Military School is an abandoned school with a mass amount of empty buildings. And I legit have been wanting to do an abandoned shoot for the longest period in my life. Well more so since I got serious about my photography journey in 2016. I had scouted it back in the summer of 2017, I had only drove by it though. But the campus is huge, impressive as fuck, and filled with so much potential.

That Monday came, the girls met at my house on the frigid fucking morning and we headed toward the campus. In retrospect there may have been a polar vortex that day too, cuz NIGGA it was cold. Oppressively and disrespectfully cold. England had told me on the drive up there that she was excited because she had viewed it online and saw some of the photos others had shot there. We were all filled with high hopes and magical negro joy.

Right about that.

We got there and all the buildings were fenced up, not regular fences but Jurassic Park style fences. Nigga is there a T-Rex here?

Oh nigga I was upset, when I drove by this place a few months prior these fences weren’t in existence. Well they were in existence but not there. Since the vibe from this place was forbidden as fuck, I parked at a store strip mall down the street from the school and we walked to the school.

Did I say it was cold as fuck? No well it was cold as fuck.

It only took a few minutes to get to campus from where I parked. We had to make sure not to step and slip on freshly frozen patches, the last thing was 3 negroes seen busting their asses on forbidden property. We looked around trying to see if there was any place we could sneak in a building.

*sigh*

Everything was boarded up and if it wasn’t boarded it was enclosed by fences that might as well be electric. At some point an old black man drove by and gave us a warning about us being on the property. At first we thought he was gonna be an informant and the cops would pull up and arrest us shortly after. But in retrospect he probably was just looking out for us so we wouldn’t be a new statistic of cop racism.

Despite his warning we stayed on campus a little while longer trying to make the best out of a blarghed scenario. The whole gated ambiance legit killed my mood, worse than an anime death scene I’ve seen. Shit was worse than seeing Neji die. At some point we saw a gated building that had a hole in it, so England and I decided that we were gonna sneak in to get some shots while her sister decided to watch out. We literally just got in the gate and she told us that she heard a car, we bolted out of the enclosure ASAP. England escaped with no problems, me not so much. My coat got snagged as did my jeans, HARD. Cotton oozed from my goat and my thigh to my shin was exposed.

NIGGA!!!

That frigid weather is way worse when your body is exposed. I felt the wind fill my pants and tickle my balls. My whole ball sack and butt hole was frozen.

Spoiler Alert it is not a pleasant feeling, no such feelings existed for me that day. GOD DAMN IT my balls were cold.

We stayed a little bit longer to get some more shots of what we could so this trip wouldn’t be a total waste, but at some point our collective negro spider senses said we should leave to avoid police confrontation. The last thing I wanted was to have icicles growing out my asshole while dealing with a problematic racist cop while pursing my dreams.

We left, arrived back at my house, and as they chose their photos I changed pants and reclaimed the heat that I had been deprived of for the past 2 hours. The shoot was ok, minus that and everything being fucking gated as fuck. Maybe one day I’ll get to shoot an abandoned building without fear of prosecution. Martin Luther King Jr died for the right to purse my art dreams.

Anyway to view some of the photos from the day my nuts became surrounded by ice click here.

Anyway as Bugs Bunny says Thats All Folks, for this issue at least. Hopefully by the next issue I will have gotten my damn X-Men Vs Street Fighter game, beaten Final Fantasy 7, went to Anderson Paaks Concert, and somehow managed to finish coloring as issue of my comic series. Yo real shit I miss being unemployed like I was in 2016 – early 2017, I could stay up all night and work on my art all night. I just wanna color damn it.

Hail to the Guardian of the Watch Tower. Sun, Moon, Star, North, South, East and West. Help me find time and give me the strength to color the rest of my comic series Azure Ascendance. Help me get it to where it is on Netflix and never have work these jobs I care nothing for ever again. And that I do the photoshoots that I didn’t get to last year.

Blessed Be.

Family Friday Fun Festivities

07 Monday Jan 2019

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unspecified-72

Dear Friends of Jano,

Its 2019 and it is a legit warm day opposed day compared to how cold it felt during the fall. MAN I hope it stays like this for like the rest of winter. My bank account would so appreciate it. Legit don’t want to pay more of a gas bill than necessary. No seriously. Keeping warm is fun until you have to pay for it.SMH.

Anyway right now I am legit typing this after deep throating a Burrito at Qdoba and fighting my urge to fully pass the fuck out like I usually do post cotton field. Spoiler Alert, I legit picked cotton today. No seriously. I felt the pain of my ancestors today in a diluted form, Moments like this why I totally sided with Killmonger. Nigga where the fuck is Wakanda??

This issue will actually be a stark contrast to the last four in terms of the amount of salt, shade and sarcasm. As in little to none.

But Jano why? I like the asshole part of you.

Awwww thanks, I actually feel warm because of that. Still tired as shit, but just a lil bit warm. Is this what humanity feels like?

But this issue is a family issue, and the events of this photoshoot was no where near as difficult as the last four. Side note this is the last photoshoot I did of 2017. By choice? No, but we will talk about that later on.

MAAAAN 2017-2018 was an existential nightmare. As Avril Lavigne’s complicated plays in my head now.

Hell this issue probably won’t be that long.

So my really close awesome homegirl friend, mother of the child I shot in Nature Badge, told me that she wanted to get photos of all her children. And since her and I have been besties since the era of Tom and Myspace I said that’s kool. The only actual issue there was with his entire shoot was to pick a time that we were both available.

In case you forgot I wasn’t working for 9 weeks over the summer of 2017, and when I did start working again it was back in the cursed land of retail. Fun. She told me about this Freedom Park Festival thing, which I literally have never heard of before a day in my life. Interestingly enough my schedule for that week allowed me to be free when she wanted. Look at retail hours not fucking up my life. Kinda.I was working 5am shifts, which are kool to a point., but nigga when you get off your body is ready to crash like *insert crashing body reference here.

Around the time it was time for me to get off I saw the store getting filled with people and it looked like my coworkers needed help…and I made no effort to help at all. Nope, no such help existed. I went to Food Lion to get cookies for the kids for a bribe. Yep, I’m not ashamed of it. I’m not good with children at all, so if snacks as a reward are gonna help you said children right so I can get photos of said children, then damn it I’m gonna buy snacks, with the parents permission. Consent is key.,

We all arrive at the park, and I’m legit trying to stay awake and keep up with the pace of life. I talked mostly to my home girls eldest daughter who I shot before, still not legit use to children liking me. Unlike R.Kelly I don’t spend time around underaged people. The whole event was fun though, the kids got their face painted, had funnel cakes, play on the playground, and did other kid things. At some point I got pointed out that a member of the Carolina Panthers was there. Don’t ask me who I legit couldn’t tell ya.

I told ya’ll this is a pretty peaceful issue. Did I give the Spoiler alert? if not

Spoiler Alert, this is a pretty peaceful issue.

To see the chillest and most relaxed photoshoot I did of 2017 click here.. Most of these are candids, but I do candids oh so well.

Anyway like I said this is the last shoot I did of 2017. Next issue will be the start of the existential crisis that was 2018.

Spoiler Alert, unlike 2017 all of the photoshoots I did in 2018 will be premiered on may website this year.

SMH.

Anyway, I am about to do what I did after the events of this shoot….go home and pass the fuck out. Well probably after I watch Naruto and One Piece. This year I’m on the final episodes of Naruto, and the DressRosa Arc of One Piece. At some point before next issue I need to beat Final Fantasy 7. Especially since I just ordered X-Men vs Street Fighter. I can finally play it in the manner it was intended 20 years ago. 14 year old Jano would be happy as fuck.

A hunt for a mermaid, no a literal FUCKING HUNT.

11 Tuesday Dec 2018

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unspecified-66

Dear Friends of Jano,

Here we are the last issue of the year, well last planned issue of the year. Unless something interesting happens….yea this is the last issue of the year. Usually I would start off with some random blurbs about the current circumstances of my life, but this issue is lengthy as fuck.

Jano how long?

Think RPG playtime, final anime boss battle long.

DAMN!

Yea, trust me living it felt a lot longer. OMG it felt like waiting for Planet Namek to explode.

In April of 2017 I thought it be kool to do a shoot about a mermaid. I don’t know if it was because of the internet or the voice of my ancestors, but that idea was planted in my head and damn it stuck. Oh how it stuck. It stuck like a super chain of STDs a serial rapist got for violating the personal space of others who had their own STDS..

As usual I went to Craigslist to sweep through the various communities in hopes to find one that can possibly bring my idea to life. But this time I had another problem to figure out. So in case you haven’t been paying attention I live in Charlotte, North Carolina. And for those who weren’t paying attention in elementary school social studies, it lies within the Piedmont region. Which, spoiler alert, means that there isn’t any coastlines or beaches near me. At best there are lakes and rivers, but that is about it.

So not only did I have to find a model, I had to figure where the fuck I was going to do this shoot at. I made an ad for help on that and color me shocked that it didn’t take that long. This dude replied and said that he would be willing to help me out and let me shoot it at as his fathers house. His father resides in South Carolina for some reason and he was house sitting for him. He sent me a picture of the area and I went YES LAAAAAWD * Anderson Paak voice. He wanted to meet first, which makes sense. I let him know at some point that I was black male, cuz we all know sometimes being black comes at ya fast even when you are doing ordinary things such as living.

Real Shit, I was nervous as fuck about this.

But Jano, haven’t you met people off the internet before?

Duh, but never has it been an elder white guy who was going to use his parents house to let me do a photo shoot to fulfill my art dreams. Even typing that now it sounds odd. Fuck, shits crazy.

Despite that we set a date to meet one May morning. The things we do for our dreams.I drove over to his house, with a box cutter in my bag and my home girl informed of my location just in case shit got weird, well weirder. Dude was odd, kool, but odd. The scariest moment of the whole conversation was when he told me how he got rid of stray cats that roamed into his yard. My niggas eyes were so lifeless when he talked of their disposal.

At some point we went to his dad’s house and OMG, the picture he had sent me didn’t do it justice. I fell more in love with the photographic potential more so. OMG. However, there was only problem with this whole scenario. Due to the nature of this dudes job of being an organ delivery driver, if he got called to do a delivery that shoot would have have to be postponed for another time since he wanted to be there on the property. That nagging factor bothered me. I told him I would be back in contact with him once I solidified a model and a time, which was true at the time. But you know life it is a fickle cunt. The girls who had shown interest prior to the meeting went full ghost when I reached back out to them. BLARGH.

But.

Before we go back to the model hunt, lets get these other details out the way. First off the location, since back up plans are a necessary thing. The place creepy cat killer had showed me was near Latta Plantation Park. Yes, the place I mentioned several issues ago. On a whim I decided to walk the path less traveled, Literally. When I was there before I had never walked any of the trails, so I figured might as well.

Yay for whims.

The environment was so Shway for the narrative I wanted to present. At the end of the trial there was a peninsula that had a nice view of the lake and barely any traces of humanity. Side note when I was surveying the area, there were people Jet skiing, I was so hoping one of them would drown and die. Anyway. Safe to say this was my location, I legit never contacted that creepy cat guy again. He has a name, but honestly at this point it doesn’t matter.

As the search for a non fickle model continued, I had to craft some props for this shoot. Timeline wise, we are in mid June at this point. I legit have never crafted shit in my life, aside from art projects in school I never had to. But you are surprised what you learn to do when there is an aesthetic you have in mind. Shout out to Youtube and Pintrest teaching how to use my hands in more magical ways. The goal one Friday June night was to make a mermaid bra and crown. Hobby Lobby and Walmart is where I got most of my supplies, in particular seashells, pipe cleaner, ribbon, and hot glue gun, There was a tiara I needed, which I promise you I have seen a million times before this day BUT the day I actually was going to buy it. Nope couldn’t be found at all. I legit bounced from several different stores to find a fucking tiara. Blessed be Super Target for having it and a bag of jewels. As for the tail, one of my home girls was a mermaid for the last halloween. She said I could borrow her dress, she didn’t have the exact dress but had one similar that I can make it look mermaid tail esque.

Now for the models. Side note, shout out to it being a snow day because real shit this is a lot to navigate through my memories. If I had picked cotton today this wouldn’t be getting done.

Anyway, the model search. Because that is the one thing that is missing from this whole fucking saga.

Spoiler alert; the upcoming contains fuckery, confusion, betrayal and more fuckery than should be encountered.

*Deep Breath*

At this point we are still in June, the girls who had expressed interest were no longer replying and others were replying who honestly I didn’t like their face or vibe. I told ya’ll I’m picky, no apologies.

I was following one girl on IG, and decided to DM her to see if she was down for the concept. And she was….kinda.

When I reached out again to see if she was available for the next week, she had informed me that she got signed to a modeling agency. Congrats I told her and the convo ended there oddly. I hit her back a week later to see if she was free the following w.end, she asked if her manager had informed me of her rates.

Rates?

Bitch a few weeks ago you were so down for the TFP. Now you done got brand new and talking about some rates? The fuck you mean rates? Look I respect the craft, but I can’t afford the craft. Especially when I am working erratic seasonal project jobs with end dates after not working for a year and 4 months. Maybe when I am full level up adult with a stable job, but right now I am relying on the kindness of strangers who with mutual interest to help me make my art dreams come true. I told her I’ll have to pass because of the whole job situation. A legit reason because I was laid off again mid July and didn’t work again until September.

FUCK.

This shit is aggravating. Even recounting this arc is aggravating. I wanna drink some Jano Juice to soothe my spirit. Maybe this weekend.

Anyway

So there was another girl who replied to one of my witch photoshoot ads. I never replied to her about that because obviously I found someone who matched what I wanted more so. But this girl had a mermaid tattoo, so I thought to ask her. MAAAAAAN I shouldn’t have. She had asked how much was she going to paid.

Bitch hold up. In the ads I am very upfront about the only compensation will be copies of the final images. I was so clear about that, so fucking clear. There legit is no room for interpretation. At all. Aside from that maybe you should not reply with ads with dirty bathroom selfies. you pasty posh cunt face.

Ok I’m done for now.

At this point it is July and I’m aggravated, so fucking aggravated. I placed a final ad on Craigslist and I won’t lie I aired out all my grievances. In particulate don’t waste my time with this, if you aren’t serious about this please don’t waste my time and please read all of the ad before asking me stupid fucking questions.

Of course someone replied….

Spoiler Alert; this is the climax of the story. Oh so much climax. That sentence probably does not make sense but fuck it.

Her name was Marlene, and she wanted to know more about the project. I told her and at some point she shared how she always felt she has been a mermaid all of her life. Who the fuck am I to argue that you felt like a mythical creature? If thats what you feel when you wake up, feel it. In my mind it will translate great in the images. Fuck Big Dick Energy, You got that mermaid energy. She inquired about a tail and since it actually seemed like I finally had a model for this fucking project, I figured I actually extend the effort to make it. I hit up my home girl who helped me with Demented Rose and Scarlet Tracks since she is big into cosplay and crafting. I was hoping she had a quick way to make a tail since every way I saw was complicated as fuck. Her answer was to buy one, and I was like nah. I’m legit not spending over 100 on fucking mermaid tail, in case you guys haven’t been paying attention I’ve been dealing with some fickle ass cunts. And I didn’t wanna be stuck with a tail for a model who went ghost on me.

So my homegirl decided to help me out, she said would be willing to help me out. She had recently brought one and would be willing to let this girl use her tail if they were the same size to help me achieve my dreams.

Ya’ll I felt like a person in that one moment. Kinda how in How The Grinch Stole Christmas when his heart grew 3 sizes bigger for some sentimental reason which I can’t exactly remember. She was Cindy Lou Hoo and I was the Grinch who was essentially at the spiritual place of fuck this.

Spoiler Alert,I have a legit complex in case you couldn’t tell.

Emotional Moment Over.

Ironically enough new girl and my friend both wear the same size. The next thing we had to do was see if the bra and crown I made fit. The crown did, but the bra that was something else. SO I let her borrow some of my supplies that I brought to make a bra, we had set a date, I told my friend and we were all in agreement.

…..

Well…

August came as well the week of the shoot, and I messaged new girl asking are we still down for the weekend and was the bra done. She told me that she had been busy with work and school.

Ok here is the thing, I checked UNCC’s school calendar. School hadn’t started yet, it wasn’t going to start until a week later. But I assumed she meant getting ready for school. Man when your ancestors tell you fuckery is afoot, you listen to your ancestors. Thursday came and I asked was she still down for the shoot, and she replied saying that wouldn’t be.

UGH.

So I had to tell my homegirl lives in Raleigh, who took off from work not to come down. She wasn’t happy about it. I can’t blame her, I would be pissed off too. So the next day since my shoot wasn’t happening, I decided to go scout Midtown Park for a future photoshoot I wanna do at some point. I get home and check my snapchat…..this bitch is driving to Baltimore, Maryland.

WHORE!!! I COULD KILL YOU!!!!!! NOT ONLY DID YOU WASTE MY TIME!!!! YOU WASTED MY FRIENDS TIME WHO WAS WILLING TO ME OUT!!!!. I SHOULD CUT YOUR BOULDER SIZE BREAST OFF AND THROW THEM AT YOUR FUCKING HEAD YOU FILTHY SNOBBISH CUNT!!!!!!!

*deep breath.

I was so god damn mad.I wanted no still want to set her apartment on fire and hope someone beats her head with a brick as she tries to escape.

I apologize to my friend, for the fact that her time was wasted and this snobbish bitch wasn’t as professional as she seemed. I asked her would she be my mermaid to help me out, she texted me after I got the email saying she would do anything to help me out. Legit felt joy and felt like I mattered to someone. I have never heard those words uttered to me before, at all. And still haven’t since then.

There goes that trash complex again.

Me and her picked a date, and at some point she came down. The first time I had seen her in a year, awwww tender moments. Problem was she forgot the bra, so we had to wait another week to do the shoot. She apologized but it was kool, at this point one more week wasn’t going to hurt all things considered. She came back down a week later, she wanted to stop by Hobby Lobby and got some supplies.

This was it and it was finally happening. 4 months later it was finally happening. Ya’ll have no idea how arduous the past 4 months had been.You legit don’t. At this point we are the on the first weekend of September. I just got a new job, the sun is starting to set earlier and the wind has gotten a chill in it that hasn’t been felt in months. Luckily the area I want to shoot my friend is pretty vacant, as in there is no one there to obstruct the background. People are legit the worse.

The narrative I had in mind was ironically similar to The Little Mermaid, Mermaid washes on shore and explores the new world.I say ironic because I never saw The Little Mermaid. Well I saw it in Spanish in 11th grade, so that doesn’t really count. She switched between her tail and the dress of my friend. At some point that fall chill became a thing and she got cold, so I tried to wrap it up as soon as I can. Defiantly didn’t want her to catch a cold because of me, my conscious can’t deal with that. When it was all said and done we went to get something to eat and watched youtube videos, as my body remembered I need to stretch before I do these shoots that involve me acting like Nightcrawler. Acrobatic as fuck even though I ain’t been to the gym in years.

But wait, before we show the pictures from this saga. We need to finish the arc first.

But Jano, what do you mean….oh that Siren faced no ass bastard.

Well, at some point she called me a week after we were supposed to shoot. But yo wtf do we have to talk about? Honestly I am not a confrontational person, I’m pretty chill until you piss me off. Waisting me and my friends time is def a way to piss me off. *Yusuke Urameshi voice. The day after me and my homegirl did our photoshoot, I checked my snapchat and Siren face had posted a video of the shells and a net saying something about mermaid things or something to that effect. A few days later there was a photo she posted about with her mermaid hashtags. Oh nah, I need my shit back. See I only let her borrow those materials to help me out, not to shoot with some other nigga.

I emailed her and we agreed on a time that week…man that meeting was so awkward. Every cell in my usually chill being wanted to take the net off the wall and Lynch her like they lynched black people in the south, but I kept it together. My father has this saying don’t piss on me and tell me it is rain. This bitch legit treated me like R.Kelly did those teenagers in the early 2000s, metaphorically. I’ll be damn if I let a cunt whore piss on em. The lies she told of how she really wanted to do the shoot but was really busy. Bitch you did the shoot, you didn’t do it with me but you did it. Pretty sure you never even thought of doing a mermaid shoot until you saw that Ad on Craigslist.

Moral of Story, Fuck it I don’t know. Infer one for yourself. But if you get a chance to choke a bitch with a net they made that is hanging on the wall, take that opportunity. Life will figure out the rest later.

I told ya’ll this was a long story, if you actually read the whole thing. Congrats your reward is here.

Hell typing this was exhausting as fuck. Shout out to this snow day again because otherwise I would have been too exhausted to recall this fuckery. I felt like I just wrote a paper when I was at UNCG.

In other news that is fuckery free, I finally finished storyboarding my comic Azure Ascendance. Now the only thing left to do is color the remaining issues. YAAAAASSSS got the impending coloring coma.At least I got that done, sadly I didn’t get all the photoshoots done this year that I wanted. Hopefully the last 3 won’t be no where near this difficult as this was, hopefully. MAN, even typing this arc was a headache.

Anyway. thats it folks. The next issue won’t be no where near this heavy and filled with salt. Its actually the last photoshoot I did of 2017, which will be the first issue…of next…..year…..FUCK IT.

See ya in 2019.

Let The Dead Watch

02 Sunday Sep 2018

Posted by janoryusaru in Uncategorized

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unspecified-18

Dear Friends of Jano,

Before we get started I just want to publicly lament how I couldn’t accomplish any of my travel goals this year because of typical job fickleness. Maybe next year I can I go afford to go to DragonCon, AfroPunk, and Charleston SC.Oh the goals I had this year, and how life scoffed at said goals. Maybe next year. Hell I hope next year I can afford to use the air conditioning,NIGGA it is September and it is still hot as fuck. NIGGA!! At this point my body has adjusted to the heat, mostly.

At least Eminem dropped a new CD which I heard is fiya. Its the little things in life that give me pleasure, especially the big victories that allude me.

ANYWAY.

Spoiler Alert. The next few issues about my photography journey will be filled with mass amounts of Shade, Salt and Sarcasm. More so than usual.

So who remembers the movie The Craft? Ya know the movie with 4 witches on the west coast. Right, well I just recently saw the movie for the first time in December of the cunt bag year of 2016.

Damn Jano, why so late?

Look we can have a whole discussion of all the movies I never saw growing up, if you really want that disappointment just email me.

I saw it and my spirit liked it, so much to the point that it inspired to do a Craft themed photoshoot. April 2017 came and I took to Craigslist and placed an ad, figured since I got a model in a quick fashion last time it would be just as easy.

Things were not that easy. Not at All.

When I planned this out in my head I wanted this to be a two parter. Half of it would take place on UNCC’s campus and the other half in a graveyard. Not any graveyard, I wanted a graveyard with actual headstones not just plaques. I had to google graveyards, because not like I spend times chilling in graveyards. Well there was that one time back in summer 08 when I was home for break. Two of my friends were like lets go hang out at a graveyard and drink late Saturday night. Spoiler Alert, that shit was kinda odd at least for me, for my two homeboys it was just another night.. Fear of being arrested is a very real thing. But man things were simpler back then.

Anyway.

My graveyard search didn’t last long, literally the first place I decided to check out had the atmosphere I was looking for. Thank you Elmwood Cemetery. Now for the model.

MAAAAAAN Listen. Arduous does not define the fuckery of this process. Holy fucking fuck of AIDS cunt fuckdom. I did get some candidates who I were legit impressed by, but these basic face Beckys would stop replying. How the FUCK do you sign up to do a witch themed photoshoot but have issues taking pictures in a graveyard? Basic fucking white girls.

Dear White People, don’t claim a lifestyle that you ain’t really down for.

The other candidates who replied to the Ad, I legit didn’t like their aesthetic. At all. Spoiler Alert, I am picky at times. Despite the desire to knock out a project I’m not just gonna accept anybody. What type of nigga do you think I am? Gosh.

There was one girl who was totally excited for the entire concept. She was fine with the graveyard, I liked her face (well how she made up her face) and I genuinely thought she was going to bring my project to life.

Nope.

At some point this little pale,sour face, anorexia nervosa, spoiled cunt stopped replying to my messages when I reached out to see if she was still down. I think I saw her working at a Starbucks at Northlake mall. I legit wanted to bash her head into the pastry container and pour hot coffee on this bitch, after I pummel her to death with a god damn scone.I bet her pussy smells like rotten garlic and a spoiled Mcdonald egg mcmuffin.

Side note, I’m actually a really chill and lackadaisical person….until you waste my time or piss me off.

At this point we are in July. Yes Friends of Jano, fucking July.

A girl replies and says she wants to model for me but thinks because she is black I won’t pick her. I tell her I don’t give a fuck as long I think she can help bring my idea to life. So she replied back with her photo and I was like YAAAAAAS. I liked her face, especially since unlike the others girls who replied she didn’t have much if any make up on in any of the photos she sent me.

And now ya’ll know where I got the term basic face Beckys, because majority of the white girl population have very beat down and bland faces without make up. Google it. Even though I don’t think this should be news.Some don’t and I applaud ya’ll for over coming that genetic defect.

Anyway we make plans to meet one day. I get downtown and try to figure out a place to park, I almost had to push this old white woman into traffic when I asked her about downtown parking and she replied with a preppy attitude. Bitch I hope your lover gives you an STD, and lets a homeless person piss on your sunburnt skin.

I told ya’ll I’m full of high grade sodium chloride for the next few issues.

We meet at the Graveyard and we vibe with each other the entire time. She tells me she hasn’t modeled in a while, I tell her its Kool as we both played off each others ideas. I had to go get quarters for our parking meters at some point, as I did that she did an outfit change. The only problem I had the entire time that there was a homeless guy who 1. Looked like he was gonna take out stuff and 2. This nigga was in the back of my potential shots so I had to rearrange what I wanted to.

OMG Jano, I can’t believe you actually did a photoshoot in a graveyard.

Look, I have dreams to follow. Plus according to all the tombstones I’m pretty sure everyone buried were old racist fucking white people. And I took great joy in trampling over their hate filled graves. I would legit fuck in a graveyard, pull out and bust my nigga cum from my bbc. Bukake for all the dead racist spirits.

Reparations Nigga!! *Dave Chappelle voice.

Anyway.

When it was over we went Amelies and she told me about the type of photos she wanted to do. I was like word sounds fun. None of them have happened yet but maybe one day hopefully. In the meantime to see the photos from this day that took 3 months in the fucking making click here.

Next issue will be special issue for lack of better words, so it won’t be any where near this amount of shade and hostility. Not to say it won’t be there but it will be diluted compared to this. Until then I’m gonna finish up rewatching Gundam Wing. 18 years later I still love that show.

Sunday Stroll

01 Wednesday Aug 2018

Posted by janoryusaru in Uncategorized

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unspecified-8

Dear Friends of Jano,

Yo On God my nigga, I hate summer rain forecast. How am I supposed to accurately plot out my life if it says it is going to rain, but yet it is as dry as all the old cum in my belly button. Now Summer Rain By Carl Thomas is playing in my head, great because I don’t have enough over emotional ass songs playing in my head.

Anyway.

Remember when I said I did 3 photoshoots last April, well this is the final one. AWWW the simple times of picking a location, asking someone to model for you, then shooting them on a set date. MAN, what a time to be alive.

But Jano what do you mean?

You’ll see in upcoming issues. Holy Fuck you will see.

Anyway.

Back in the cunt bag year of 2016 in August when I was unemployed and foolishly trying to get a stable job as a web designer.

I went to a crash course coding networking event for the now defunct as fuck Iron Yard. It was in Uptown/ Downtown Charlotte in this building called Packard Place.While I was waiting for this event aka waste of my time to start, I stared out the window and saw Romare Bearden Park. I started thinking it would be fun to do a shoot there.

Fast Forward to March 2017.

Two of my friends from college decided to visit me. At some point when they were having a conversation which I could contribute nothing to, so I started scrolling on Instagram.

Jano, that is so rude.

Fuck off, ya’ll do it too.

Anyway, I was scrolling and saw a photo from one of my former slave coworkers from the plantation, IKEA. At some point I decided to ask if she would model for me, she said yea, and I internally while externally went YAAAAS.

I promise ON GOD, ON GOD MY NIGGA, this is the last time that a model search will be this fucking easy for me. I legit just face palmed.

Anyway.

Even though me and her worked together at that cunt customer cotton field for 3 years, I legit didn’t know anything about her or fashion sense. Real shit majority of the time I saw her I talked shit to her. But not hardcore shit that would make someone do a Hannah Baker, but like soft core shit that you could put on a ice cream cone and serve up with a smile.

I just threw up in my mouth a little with that analogy.

We met up so I could browse her closet and we picked an outfit each, picked a date, and caught up about life after. The next day I went to downtown to plan a route for how I wanted this shoot to go. Because ya know its important to storyboard mentally how you want events to go that you are planning. At least in my world.

Alicia Keys so simple is so playing in my head right now.

The day came and I was one of the few who realized that drinking and driving isn’t a good thing and spent the night at a friends house after a bday party. Safety First. Fast Forward through slow service at Midnight Diner, Goodbyes, college buddy group photos, and me going home to showering (because ya know hygiene is key), it was shoot time.

She had never modeled before and I was like girl you’ll be fine.

And she was, Legitly.

She had a lot of excitement and I didn’t regret my choice. She channeled her Americas Next Top Model as she got comfortable being in front of the camera. I almost felt bad for all the soft serve shit I gave her in the cotton field. Almost.

Everything for the next few hours were Kool….. except when my nuts met a guard rail. HOLY FUCK OF FUCKING FUCKED CUNTS, FUCKING JOB HAZARDS. She told me to shhh my yelling because a child was near by. NIGGA FUCK THAT CHILD!!. My tender freshly clean nuts just got more tenderized by this fucking metal guard rail. NIGGA!!!!

Spoiler Alert, if we do a shoot and I get hurt in an extreme way I will yell. No fucks shall be given about the opinions and ear drums of the surrounding people. None, no such fucks shall exist.

Anyway to see the by product of this blissfully planned day go here.

In case ya’ll have been wondering why I keep emphasizing how easy things went is because the next four photoshoots I talk about were arduous as when Vegeta was trying to become a Super Saiyan. Didn’t get that anime reference? Fine, it was like trying to avoid spoilers on the internet when you haven’t seen an episode or movie yet. Actually I rather try to avoid spoilers then deal with the fuckery I dealt with last summer.

Ironically enough despite planning it is happening again this year.

Spoiler Alert, the next few issues will be full of shade, sarcasm and salt. So much Salt that you would think I was gonna put Mortons Salt out of business.

The moment you realize that your Art Journey is similar to a Role Playing Game.

Have I leveled up yet?

Antics

27 Wednesday Jun 2018

Posted by janoryusaru in Uncategorized

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antics2

Dear Friends of Jano,

Pretty sure most of you looked at the picture and guessed what this issue is about.

Spoiler Alert, you probably ain’t wrong.

I finally saw Deadpool 2 today, literally late as fuck compared to the rest of humanity. But the good part I had the theater to myself…mostly. I hate going to the movies when it is first released. Legit too many people for my liking. Plus if it is a super hero movie there are kids. I hate kids. I legit hate the children with all their noise, noise and noise.

Jano, Did you just quote the Grinch?

Yes because that is the way I feel in my heart. I went to go see Fantastic Four back in 2005, and there were kids asking their parents could they get Fantastic Four toys after the movies. NO YOU CAN’T GET NO DAMN TOYS JOHNNY, YOU ARE RUINING MY MOVIE EXPERIENCE. CUNT!!

No Apologies for calling a child a cunt.

Somehow after avoiding weeks of spoilers, I legit managed to be surprised by everything that happened when I saw it. Despite how many times I say Spoiler alert, I will not actually say anything that will spoil the movie for any of you.

But Jano you just called a child a cunt.

Whats your point?

The point of this whole issue is that I enjoyed this movie so much, that I drew the image at the top before it came out months ago.

Wait what?

Yep, The result of not giving a fuck about the cotton you are picking at work. I legit didn’t know anything about the movie except that Cable and Domino were going to be in it.

Before we go on, can we take a minute to appreciate Zazie Beats as Domino. YES LAWD *Anderson Paak Voice.

Oh yea that there was going to be time travel, because duh Cable.

Its so ironic to see him as Cable when 2 months ago he snaps away half the universe as Thanos. Awwww tender moments.

At any rate, the point of this image was to promote my comic series Azure Ascendance, just in case it wasn’t obvious with Deadpool holding an issue.

SMH y’all ain’t woke.

To see it in gallery format, go forth yonder here.

Moral of the story. Deadpool 2 makes my soft boy parts throb with joy like the first one. I hope when my friends watched it, I hope they thought about me like they said they did during the first one.

Blah I have the biggest hunger headache right now, even though I have been eating like…something…that eats a lot. FUCK IT!!!

Go watch the movie, bring lotion or you’ll regret it. I did.

I want cheese sticks.

JanoRyusaru.com: Home of the Jrpg Jano's Bizarre Art Adventure

~ Charlotte Artist, Photographer, and Creator of Azure Ascendance

Tag Archives: anime

Fat Henry, BTS

Azuma Kara

DAMN IT RYUSARU!! GET ME PICTURES OF SILK!!

Gummy Rose

Abandoned Ravens Nest

A hunt for a mermaid, no a literal FUCKING HUNT.

Let The Dead Watch

Sunday Stroll

Antics