Its 2019 and it is a legit warm day opposed day compared to how cold it felt during the fall. MAN I hope it stays like this for like the rest of winter. My bank account would so appreciate it. Legit don’t want to pay more of a gas bill than necessary. No seriously. Keeping warm is fun until you have to pay for it.SMH.
Anyway right now I am legit typing this after deep throating a Burrito at Qdoba and fighting my urge to fully pass the fuck out like I usually do post cotton field. Spoiler Alert, I legit picked cotton today. No seriously. I felt the pain of my ancestors today in a diluted form, Moments like this why I totally sided with Killmonger. Nigga where the fuck is Wakanda??
This issue will actually be a stark contrast to the last four in terms of the amount of salt, shade and sarcasm. As in little to none.
But Jano why? I like the asshole part of you.
Awwww thanks, I actually feel warm because of that. Still tired as shit, but just a lil bit warm. Is this what humanity feels like?
But this issue is a family issue, and the events of this photoshoot was no where near as difficult as the last four. Side note this is the last photoshoot I did of 2017. By choice? No, but we will talk about that later on.
MAAAAN 2017-2018 was an existential nightmare. As Avril Lavigne’s complicated plays in my head now.
Hell this issue probably won’t be that long.
So my really close awesome homegirl friend, mother of the child I shot in Nature Badge, told me that she wanted to get photos of all her children. And since her and I have been besties since the era of Tom and Myspace I said that’s kool. The only actual issue there was with his entire shoot was to pick a time that we were both available.
In case you forgot I wasn’t working for 9 weeks over the summer of 2017, and when I did start working again it was back in the cursed land of retail. Fun. She told me about this Freedom Park Festival thing, which I literally have never heard of before a day in my life. Interestingly enough my schedule for that week allowed me to be free when she wanted. Look at retail hours not fucking up my life. Kinda.I was working 5am shifts, which are kool to a point., but nigga when you get off your body is ready to crash like *insert crashing body reference here.
Around the time it was time for me to get off I saw the store getting filled with people and it looked like my coworkers needed help…and I made no effort to help at all. Nope, no such help existed. I went to Food Lion to get cookies for the kids for a bribe. Yep, I’m not ashamed of it. I’m not good with children at all, so if snacks as a reward are gonna help you said children right so I can get photos of said children, then damn it I’m gonna buy snacks, with the parents permission. Consent is key.,
We all arrive at the park, and I’m legit trying to stay awake and keep up with the pace of life. I talked mostly to my home girls eldest daughter who I shot before, still not legit use to children liking me. Unlike R.Kelly I don’t spend time around underaged people. The whole event was fun though, the kids got their face painted, had funnel cakes, play on the playground, and did other kid things. At some point I got pointed out that a member of the Carolina Panthers was there. Don’t ask me who I legit couldn’t tell ya.
I told ya’ll this is a pretty peaceful issue. Did I give the Spoiler alert? if not
Spoiler Alert, this is a pretty peaceful issue.
To see the chillest and most relaxed photoshoot I did of 2017 click here.. Most of these are candids, but I do candids oh so well.
Anyway like I said this is the last shoot I did of 2017. Next issue will be the start of the existential crisis that was 2018.
Spoiler Alert, unlike 2017 all of the photoshoots I did in 2018 will be premiered on may website this year.
Anyway, I am about to do what I did after the events of this shoot….go home and pass the fuck out. Well probably after I watch Naruto and One Piece. This year I’m on the final episodes of Naruto, and the DressRosa Arc of One Piece. At some point before next issue I need to beat Final Fantasy 7. Especially since I just ordered X-Men vs Street Fighter. I can finally play it in the manner it was intended 20 years ago. 14 year old Jano would be happy as fuck.
Here we are the last issue of the year, well last planned issue of the year. Unless something interesting happens….yea this is the last issue of the year. Usually I would start off with some random blurbs about the current circumstances of my life, but this issue is lengthy as fuck.
Jano how long?
Think RPG playtime, final anime boss battle long.
Yea, trust me living it felt a lot longer. OMG it felt like waiting for Planet Namek to explode.
In April of 2017 I thought it be kool to do a shoot about a mermaid. I don’t know if it was because of the internet or the voice of my ancestors, but that idea was planted in my head and damn it stuck. Oh how it stuck. It stuck like a super chain of STDs a serial rapist got for violating the personal space of others who had their own STDS..
As usual I went to Craigslist to sweep through the various communities in hopes to find one that can possibly bring my idea to life. But this time I had another problem to figure out. So in case you haven’t been paying attention I live in Charlotte, North Carolina. And for those who weren’t paying attention in elementary school social studies, it lies within the Piedmont region. Which, spoiler alert, means that there isn’t any coastlines or beaches near me. At best there are lakes and rivers, but that is about it.
So not only did I have to find a model, I had to figure where the fuck I was going to do this shoot at. I made an ad for help on that and color me shocked that it didn’t take that long. This dude replied and said that he would be willing to help me out and let me shoot it at as his fathers house. His father resides in South Carolina for some reason and he was house sitting for him. He sent me a picture of the area and I went YES LAAAAAWD * Anderson Paak voice. He wanted to meet first, which makes sense. I let him know at some point that I was black male, cuz we all know sometimes being black comes at ya fast even when you are doing ordinary things such as living.
Real Shit, I was nervous as fuck about this.
But Jano, haven’t you met people off the internet before?
Duh, but never has it been an elder white guy who was going to use his parents house to let me do a photo shoot to fulfill my art dreams. Even typing that now it sounds odd. Fuck, shits crazy.
Despite that we set a date to meet one May morning. The things we do for our dreams.I drove over to his house, with a box cutter in my bag and my home girl informed of my location just in case shit got weird, well weirder. Dude was odd, kool, but odd. The scariest moment of the whole conversation was when he told me how he got rid of stray cats that roamed into his yard. My niggas eyes were so lifeless when he talked of their disposal.
At some point we went to his dad’s house and OMG, the picture he had sent me didn’t do it justice. I fell more in love with the photographic potential more so. OMG. However, there was only problem with this whole scenario. Due to the nature of this dudes job of being an organ delivery driver, if he got called to do a delivery that shoot would have have to be postponed for another time since he wanted to be there on the property. That nagging factor bothered me. I told him I would be back in contact with him once I solidified a model and a time, which was true at the time. But you know life it is a fickle cunt. The girls who had shown interest prior to the meeting went full ghost when I reached back out to them. BLARGH.
Before we go back to the model hunt, lets get these other details out the way. First off the location, since back up plans are a necessary thing. The place creepy cat killer had showed me was near Latta Plantation Park. Yes, the place I mentioned several issues ago. On a whim I decided to walk the path less traveled, Literally. When I was there before I had never walked any of the trails, so I figured might as well.
Yay for whims.
The environment was so Shway for the narrative I wanted to present. At the end of the trial there was a peninsula that had a nice view of the lake and barely any traces of humanity. Side note when I was surveying the area, there were people Jet skiing, I was so hoping one of them would drown and die. Anyway. Safe to say this was my location, I legit never contacted that creepy cat guy again. He has a name, but honestly at this point it doesn’t matter.
As the search for a non fickle model continued, I had to craft some props for this shoot. Timeline wise, we are in mid June at this point. I legit have never crafted shit in my life, aside from art projects in school I never had to. But you are surprised what you learn to do when there is an aesthetic you have in mind. Shout out to Youtube and Pintrest teaching how to use my hands in more magical ways. The goal one Friday June night was to make a mermaid bra and crown. Hobby Lobby and Walmart is where I got most of my supplies, in particular seashells, pipe cleaner, ribbon, and hot glue gun, There was a tiara I needed, which I promise you I have seen a million times before this day BUT the day I actually was going to buy it. Nope couldn’t be found at all. I legit bounced from several different stores to find a fucking tiara. Blessed be Super Target for having it and a bag of jewels. As for the tail, one of my home girls was a mermaid for the last halloween. She said I could borrow her dress, she didn’t have the exact dress but had one similar that I can make it look mermaid tail esque.
Now for the models. Side note, shout out to it being a snow day because real shit this is a lot to navigate through my memories. If I had picked cotton today this wouldn’t be getting done.
Anyway, the model search. Because that is the one thing that is missing from this whole fucking saga.
Spoiler alert; the upcoming contains fuckery, confusion, betrayal and more fuckery than should be encountered.
At this point we are still in June, the girls who had expressed interest were no longer replying and others were replying who honestly I didn’t like their face or vibe. I told ya’ll I’m picky, no apologies.
I was following one girl on IG, and decided to DM her to see if she was down for the concept. And she was….kinda.
When I reached out again to see if she was available for the next week, she had informed me that she got signed to a modeling agency. Congrats I told her and the convo ended there oddly. I hit her back a week later to see if she was free the following w.end, she asked if her manager had informed me of her rates.
Bitch a few weeks ago you were so down for the TFP. Now you done got brand new and talking about some rates? The fuck you mean rates? Look I respect the craft, but I can’t afford the craft. Especially when I am working erratic seasonal project jobs with end dates after not working for a year and 4 months. Maybe when I am full level up adult with a stable job, but right now I am relying on the kindness of strangers who with mutual interest to help me make my art dreams come true. I told her I’ll have to pass because of the whole job situation. A legit reason because I was laid off again mid July and didn’t work again until September.
This shit is aggravating. Even recounting this arc is aggravating. I wanna drink some Jano Juice to soothe my spirit. Maybe this weekend.
So there was another girl who replied to one of my witch photoshoot ads. I never replied to her about that because obviously I found someone who matched what I wanted more so. But this girl had a mermaid tattoo, so I thought to ask her. MAAAAAAN I shouldn’t have. She had asked how much was she going to paid.
Bitch hold up. In the ads I am very upfront about the only compensation will be copies of the final images. I was so clear about that, so fucking clear. There legit is no room for interpretation. At all. Aside from that maybe you should not reply with ads with dirty bathroom selfies. you pasty posh cunt face.
Ok I’m done for now.
At this point it is July and I’m aggravated, so fucking aggravated. I placed a final ad on Craigslist and I won’t lie I aired out all my grievances. In particulate don’t waste my time with this, if you aren’t serious about this please don’t waste my time and please read all of the ad before asking me stupid fucking questions.
Of course someone replied….
Spoiler Alert; this is the climax of the story. Oh so much climax. That sentence probably does not make sense but fuck it.
Her name was Marlene, and she wanted to know more about the project. I told her and at some point she shared how she always felt she has been a mermaid all of her life. Who the fuck am I to argue that you felt like a mythical creature? If thats what you feel when you wake up, feel it. In my mind it will translate great in the images. Fuck Big Dick Energy, You got that mermaid energy. She inquired about a tail and since it actually seemed like I finally had a model for this fucking project, I figured I actually extend the effort to make it. I hit up my home girl who helped me with Demented Rose and Scarlet Tracks since she is big into cosplay and crafting. I was hoping she had a quick way to make a tail since every way I saw was complicated as fuck. Her answer was to buy one, and I was like nah. I’m legit not spending over 100 on fucking mermaid tail, in case you guys haven’t been paying attention I’ve been dealing with some fickle ass cunts. And I didn’t wanna be stuck with a tail for a model who went ghost on me.
So my homegirl decided to help me out, she said would be willing to help me out. She had recently brought one and would be willing to let this girl use her tail if they were the same size to help me achieve my dreams.
Ya’ll I felt like a person in that one moment. Kinda how in How The Grinch Stole Christmas when his heart grew 3 sizes bigger for some sentimental reason which I can’t exactly remember. She was Cindy Lou Hoo and I was the Grinch who was essentially at the spiritual place of fuck this.
Spoiler Alert,I have a legit complex in case you couldn’t tell.
Emotional Moment Over.
Ironically enough new girl and my friend both wear the same size. The next thing we had to do was see if the bra and crown I made fit. The crown did, but the bra that was something else. SO I let her borrow some of my supplies that I brought to make a bra, we had set a date, I told my friend and we were all in agreement.
August came as well the week of the shoot, and I messaged new girl asking are we still down for the weekend and was the bra done. She told me that she had been busy with work and school.
Ok here is the thing, I checked UNCC’s school calendar. School hadn’t started yet, it wasn’t going to start until a week later. But I assumed she meant getting ready for school. Man when your ancestors tell you fuckery is afoot, you listen to your ancestors. Thursday came and I asked was she still down for the shoot, and she replied saying that wouldn’t be.
So I had to tell my homegirl lives in Raleigh, who took off from work not to come down. She wasn’t happy about it. I can’t blame her, I would be pissed off too. So the next day since my shoot wasn’t happening, I decided to go scout Midtown Park for a future photoshoot I wanna do at some point. I get home and check my snapchat…..this bitch is driving to Baltimore, Maryland.
WHORE!!! I COULD KILL YOU!!!!!! NOT ONLY DID YOU WASTE MY TIME!!!! YOU WASTED MY FRIENDS TIME WHO WAS WILLING TO ME OUT!!!!. I SHOULD CUT YOUR BOULDER SIZE BREAST OFF AND THROW THEM AT YOUR FUCKING HEAD YOU FILTHY SNOBBISH CUNT!!!!!!!
I was so god damn mad.I wanted no still want to set her apartment on fire and hope someone beats her head with a brick as she tries to escape.
I apologize to my friend, for the fact that her time was wasted and this snobbish bitch wasn’t as professional as she seemed. I asked her would she be my mermaid to help me out, she texted me after I got the email saying she would do anything to help me out. Legit felt joy and felt like I mattered to someone. I have never heard those words uttered to me before, at all. And still haven’t since then.
There goes that trash complex again.
Me and her picked a date, and at some point she came down. The first time I had seen her in a year, awwww tender moments. Problem was she forgot the bra, so we had to wait another week to do the shoot. She apologized but it was kool, at this point one more week wasn’t going to hurt all things considered. She came back down a week later, she wanted to stop by Hobby Lobby and got some supplies.
This was it and it was finally happening. 4 months later it was finally happening. Ya’ll have no idea how arduous the past 4 months had been.You legit don’t. At this point we are the on the first weekend of September. I just got a new job, the sun is starting to set earlier and the wind has gotten a chill in it that hasn’t been felt in months. Luckily the area I want to shoot my friend is pretty vacant, as in there is no one there to obstruct the background. People are legit the worse.
The narrative I had in mind was ironically similar to The Little Mermaid, Mermaid washes on shore and explores the new world.I say ironic because I never saw The Little Mermaid. Well I saw it in Spanish in 11th grade, so that doesn’t really count. She switched between her tail and the dress of my friend. At some point that fall chill became a thing and she got cold, so I tried to wrap it up as soon as I can. Defiantly didn’t want her to catch a cold because of me, my conscious can’t deal with that. When it was all said and done we went to get something to eat and watched youtube videos, as my body remembered I need to stretch before I do these shoots that involve me acting like Nightcrawler. Acrobatic as fuck even though I ain’t been to the gym in years.
But wait, before we show the pictures from this saga. We need to finish the arc first.
But Jano, what do you mean….oh that Siren faced no ass bastard.
Well, at some point she called me a week after we were supposed to shoot. But yo wtf do we have to talk about? Honestly I am not a confrontational person, I’m pretty chill until you piss me off. Waisting me and my friends time is def a way to piss me off. *Yusuke Urameshi voice. The day after me and my homegirl did our photoshoot, I checked my snapchat and Siren face had posted a video of the shells and a net saying something about mermaid things or something to that effect. A few days later there was a photo she posted about with her mermaid hashtags. Oh nah, I need my shit back. See I only let her borrow those materials to help me out, not to shoot with some other nigga.
I emailed her and we agreed on a time that week…man that meeting was so awkward. Every cell in my usually chill being wanted to take the net off the wall and Lynch her like they lynched black people in the south, but I kept it together. My father has this saying don’t piss on me and tell me it is rain. This bitch legit treated me like R.Kelly did those teenagers in the early 2000s, metaphorically. I’ll be damn if I let a cunt whore piss on em. The lies she told of how she really wanted to do the shoot but was really busy. Bitch you did the shoot, you didn’t do it with me but you did it. Pretty sure you never even thought of doing a mermaid shoot until you saw that Ad on Craigslist.
Moral of Story, Fuck it I don’t know. Infer one for yourself. But if you get a chance to choke a bitch with a net they made that is hanging on the wall, take that opportunity. Life will figure out the rest later.
I told ya’ll this was a long story, if you actually read the whole thing. Congrats your reward is here.
Hell typing this was exhausting as fuck. Shout out to this snow day again because otherwise I would have been too exhausted to recall this fuckery. I felt like I just wrote a paper when I was at UNCG.
In other news that is fuckery free, I finally finished storyboarding my comic Azure Ascendance. Now the only thing left to do is color the remaining issues. YAAAAASSSS got the impending coloring coma.At least I got that done, sadly I didn’t get all the photoshoots done this year that I wanted. Hopefully the last 3 won’t be no where near this difficult as this was, hopefully. MAN, even typing this arc was a headache.
Anyway. thats it folks. The next issue won’t be no where near this heavy and filled with salt. Its actually the last photoshoot I did of 2017, which will be the first issue…of next…..year…..FUCK IT.
Yo if anyone gets me the new Spider Man game for PS4 I PROMISE, I fucking promise on god that I will….probably just be extremely grateful. Idk. I’m not big on making promises that I may not or don’t want to keep.
Anyway, here we are. That nice little bonus issue that I was talking about in my last issue filled with high grade NaCl.
Some of you are probably googling NaCl. Salt niggas, Salt. Which I don’t plan on having an abundance of in this issue.
Anyway I want to debut my new Sketchtape.
Definition of Sketchtape, a clever combination of Sketchbook and Mixtape.
Used in a sentence,
Jano Ryusaru Presents his new Sketchtape Emerald Evisceration.
I actually finished this earlier this year, but didn’t want to premiere it until I finish debuting each image on my social media pages from my last project Numinously Noir.
I started working on this spring 2017. At some point when I was working on Act 1 of my comic series Azure Ascendance, I had an urge to draw crazy ridiculous shit like I did in my first Sketchtape Miasmic Emancipation.
No thoughts, no fucks, just random line strokes and whatever formed is what formed. In a sense it was my Marshall Mathers 2. You can try to figure out “the meaning” of each image if you want, its your cognitive function you are wasting not mine.
However Spoiler alert, only 2 of these images in this project have any significance to me at all. If you figure out which then feel free to email me which 2 you think it is. The only thing you will get is a right or wrong answer. So if validation is what you are seeking feel free. Don’t expect us to do a discussion on it though.
The initial plan was to color these images when I was all finished with my comic series, but ya know how life be. Me getting my computer and drawing tablet stolen really fucked up my production schedule of my series. So I shifted to a mindset of I’ll color Act 2 once I finish storyboarding Act 3 and 4. Eventually I got my replacements, but the photography projects that I thought I would be able to knock out with no problems kept having well problems. Hell it still it is, here it is September and I still haven’t been able to do the 6 shoots I wanted to do this year. Fickle ass cunts denying me my infinity stones.I promise you disrespect is when someone says they will do the shoot, you buy the supplies and you never hear from them again. A message saying “I changed my mind” or something similar would suffice, instead of me foolishly reaching out and wasting my time waiting.
OMG Jano, what if they are reading this?
Spoiler Alert; I don’t give a fuck.
What does this have to do with my SketchTape, well a person has to self medicate some how. Some people buy adult coloring books, I color in images that I already drew a year prior. The combination of continuous cancellations and delays, fickle mindsets of those who previously agreed and a hidden episode from a saga in 2016 hit me pretty hard. Gotta love an existential crisis that you can numb through coloring with a myriad of hex codes, while blasting Incubus, Jungle Pussy, and Krizz Kaliko. I think I would have rather fought Thanos instead but an art catharsis is kool too, I guess.
I emotionally stroke this project down and didn’t pull out. Drip Drip.
You can either view the project in its entirety here. Or you can either follow my social media pages (see links on side bar navigation because I am not linking each of them here again) and watch me drop an image a month. Your choice, not my concern.
Next issue we continue my photography journey. Until then I’m gonna do hood rat shit with my friends, I think I have earned it after the past few months. But right now I am gonna lay here and let my back heal from drawing. Yea you read that right. Also yay for Iron Fist season 2 not sucking, I actually didn’t cringe nearly as much as I did in season 1.
1. There isn’t that much to say about why I drew this 2. I gotta pick cotton in a few hours so ya know.
I saw Black Panther this w.end with 2 of my friends and well Wakanda Forever.
I wonder if we would have had a Wakanda if slavery never existed? Fuck Slavery,Colonialism,and greedy racist white people.
Real Shit this movie is equal to Deadpool to me, even though unlike my favorite Merc with a Mouth I had no knowledge of the Wakanda King what so ever. However my favorite character in the movie was Killmonger. I want to model my life after him, maybe if I do I’ll get me some white slaves. Reparations is goals, so is bound through oppression of my oppressors.
But Jano what about your white friends? Would we be slaves too?
Dear White People, if I know you and actually like you, you’ll be in the house with me.If not you better get ready to pick cotton like my ancestors.
Spoiler Alert, I want to wear nice high quality Bill Cosby sweaters so you better pick that good cotton.
Anyway I decided to draw a picture with the King of Wakanda with the Empress Watatsumi of the Posei Kingdom and all of the country of Azure from my story Azure Ascendance. Yay Black Love and Black Excellence.
But Jano what about Storm?
Look I like Storm and the X-Men, I do they are one of my favorite non anime properties. BUT I felt like drawing my character with T’Challa instead. Straight like that.
Anyway thats it.
To see the image check out the new gallery I made on my Behance Page here.. It will be where I put all drawings that are Bonus special occasionish, I’m calling it Bonus DLC, cute right.
Like I said this was gonna be a short issue cuz I have to be up in a few hours.
Spoiler Alert, this is the first thing I have colored in a month. NIGGA THE CATHARSIS I felt while I colored listening to Ella Mai, Sabrina Claudio, and Halsey on Spotify. While thinking that the new season of Atlanta premieres tonight. NIGGA WHAT!!!
Anyway thats it, next issue will be the Mad Monster Party images from a few weeks ago.
Well here we are the last photo shoot of 2016. The last time I meaningfully picked up my camera that year.
Yeah I’ll get to that in a moment.
Wait Jano, you are doing 2 issues this month?
Yeah well, I realized when I was in the cotton field today that March will have a few things I will debuting Sooooooooooooooo figured I’d do this one now.
Alright are we done with the questions? We are? Ok good.
Back to what I was initially saying, this was the last time I meaningfully I picked up my camera that year. Around this time I was STILL unemployed, Spoiler Alert I didn’t get a job at all that year. Through a litany of events which I don’t feel like typing, I started going to a bunch of networking events….which literally was a waste of my fucking time. OMG, all that social anxiety and awkwardness for no reason whatsoever. Anyway whenever I went I always brought my camera to photograph the event, cuz ya know habits. And at some point I legit thought about selling my camera and saying frag it all, yeah shit was pretty dark at that time.
Anyway at some point one of my home girls I went to college together at UNCG with told me that her and her husband were expecting their first child together and was having a gender reveal party. And since this was important to her and she has fed me so many times since Oct 2007, no really she has fed me a lot. OMG Jano would have starved sometimes if it won’t for her.
I showed up and did what I do best, observe through a camera lens. At some point the gender of the baby was revealed and she had a……..yeah you’ll have to click here to find out. I will say that I am very happy for her and husband and the lives they are creating together.
Spoiler Alert, that is probably one of the nicest things you will ever hear me say.
Anyway as I said this was the last time I meaningfully picked up my camera in the cunty year of 2016. And with that I can let this year go finally, yaaaas closure.
Next issue, no actually all of next month will be flashback free. Do you remember how a few issues ago I said sometimes I was doing the Sonic Cd, past, present, past format. Right well we are gonna be in the present for all of next month. Then come April we will continue my photo journey into 2017, which won’t that bad…..wait….yea we will get to that in time.
In other news, last night I finally saw Thor: Ragnarok. Loki is still probably my favorite character followed by Thor’s mannerisms. But OMG Tessa Thompson in Valkyrie’s battle costume was amazing to me when she walked off the ship with the fireworks.
YES LAWD *said in Anderson Paak voice
But now that I have seen that I can journey to Wakanda Saturday and see the new Black Panther movie. Legit wasn’t going to see it until I saw Thor. I don’t give a damn if they individually don’t link for the sake of the whole cinematic Marvel Story I can’t skip movies. I don’t know shit about Black Panther but I feel like this KillMonger will be my new favorite villain.
Ok, I’m done now, I’m off to do art related things since I don’t have to wake up early as fuck to pick cotton tomorrow. And remember class always and forever, Fuck 2016.