Fuck, I don’t even know how to start this issue. Although technically I did just start it with a nice medium size fuck.
You know what else is fun? The fact that I’ve been checking my website stats and people are actually coming to my website on a more frequent basis. I’m impressed because no one was coming here for a while when this first started. Are people actually reading the lengthy thesis level issues I present on a monthly basis? I have no idea, but you’ve been logged in the record book either way niggaaaaaa.
So Spoiler Alert, this isn’t going to be your standard issue of me recalling a photoshoot. Honestly at this point in my life I am too exhausted for it right now.
Despite the fact that the next few issues are pretty straight forward and simple. Probably because they aren’t my ideas and don’t involve the chaos of me trying to find a model, a location, etc, etc, et fuckin cera.
Yay, I guess.
But right now I am legit not in the mood for a flashback of Jano Bizarre JRPG Adventure….and I may not be for a month, or two…or more…..
I type this as I listen to Minthaze latest album which matches my somber mood as of late.
OMG Jano are you ok?
Eh, its a litany of things honestly.
Hey Google play H.E.R. I’m not ok. If this was Myspace i would totally have that song embedded on this issue. Simpler times…kinda.
I’m not sure why September sucks for me, but it does. Every year for no apparent reason, maybe it is some form of seasonal affective disorder. You may think I say this in jest, but I’m not. Like clockwork when September arrives my spirit withers for the bulk of the month, even if there is no type of dramatic saga occuring.
However this year it is coupled with a few things.
My Car still isn’t working sadly. I finally took it to the shop and I’m hoping next week ends me having to depend on lyft drivers and using my girlfriends car. At this point in my life I just wanna do hoodrat shit with my friends while surviving a pandemic and racism. That feels like a facebook status, but right now I think I am about to be in recluse mode and disappear off the internet for a while. But this saga has persisted for the last 6 months and I just want it to end.
Essentially I have been grounded and as such I’ve tried to make the best of my time. And with that I have been doing entirely too fucking much in hopes to get my art in these streets. Particularly in the streets of Atlanta, New York City and California via bookstores.
Thats the goal at least. I already have it in one here in Charlotte, but that isn’t good enough for me. I think going to New York City really changed my perspective on somethings. At some point I want to have a book signing event, but I’m still currently making merchandise to ideally sell.
Thats right, lil ol Jano is crafting up in these streets. Ideally before October ends there will at least be a store front. I say ideally because I wanted all this shit done over the fucking summer. But when you combine a Jeff Bezos cottonfield that doesn’t provide many hours nor chances to pick up extra shifts and a car problem that isn’t properly diagnosed, and other things that i can’t put in quick quip phrases. It makes any plans that involve cash rather difficult to fulfill.
So there is that as well.
On top of that I found out I have another art show in a month, which i need to make 2 new pieces for which isn’t so bad. However, I really want to finish coloring issue 13 and do the final touches on act 3 of my comic series. Sadly that may be the last full issue I finish this year.Maybe i can get through issue 14, maybe. The current cottonfield I’m in is busy until Halloween and after that everything tapers off. The real question is will I get kept afterwards and then how long. If i could be unemployed for a few months to work on my book that would be great, but things cost fucking money and its upsetting. Here’s hoping things work out on the art front of life and everything else follows suit.
In midst of all this I found out a friend from college passed away from cancer, adding fuel to the existential fire. Contemplation of how at some points we will either be mourning the lost of friends over the years or we will be the one who is being mourned.
The concept of time is absolutely terrifying. As is how eventually we drift apart from each other after we leave a space, and eventually get caught up in the space of our new lives to the point where we rarely reach out to those we no longer share a space with. That sentence was probably a run on but you. caught what I was pitching.
It hurts….at least for me. I miss my friends as I navigate this trail of trials.
I realized in the 4 years I’ve had this site this is the most vulnerable I’ve been.
Sometimes vulnerability is needed tho. Especially when it comes to breaking a pattern I have established over the bulk of the past four years. Right now I’m not in the space to recall a saga with all the plates I need to prepare for consumption as well. Maybe I’ll be gone til November…maybe by then I’ll be back to just working on my book and an issue a month.
In non somber news, I just finished Dear White People today. I legit loved that show. I was hoping to be finished with my comic before it was over, that and Insecure. However it does not appear to be the case. Ugh I just got somber and existential again.
As long as I finish before One Piece ends. That is still doable…I think.
Side note, if you want to help me get out of these bullshit seasonal cottonfields, while wanting to help have a meaningful job that helps the community and care about the black community. You should donate to Back to Black, the organization I help out with when not wandering through the art fields.
Was that a shameless promotion to help me the non profit work with to get funded faster so that I can have real job?
Do I give a shit how tactless that was?
At least it wasn’t as tasteless as a youtube ad.
FUCK, i just remember another Mercury Retrograde is on the way.
Life has been a bit wonky lately. Part of me wants to blame it on Mercury Retrograde….ya know what fuck it. I totally blame it on Mercury Retrograde. More so since I found out there has been 2 this year so far and a third is still to come.
What type of fuckery is this?
All I wanna do is do hood rat shit with my friends, play video games, be a witch, work on my comic series, and save up enough money from the bullshit cotton field I work at and from art products I want to make and sell so that I can quit and work on my book again until its completed.
Spoiler Alert, I Just want to color all night like I did in 2016.
Thats all. I’m a simple man.
But no, lately its been trying to figure why the fuck my car keeps on stalling. Dude its so annoying and traumatic all things considered, on Kami. Hopefully this will be resolved soon.
Anyway today I felt nostalgic as fuck as I realized the position of the calendar day of this month. 5 years ago in the trying times of 2016….actually in retrospect 2016 was kinda fun, minus being unemployed….I was trying to figure out how to build this fucking website on a Saturday after watching Dope for the first time.
FUCK, its been 5 years since i really got serious in this art journey.
The concept of time is so scary….also are all these fire works that are being shot off right now as I type this.As a nigga in the hood I know the difference between firecrackers and gunshots. Although right now it sounds like canons are being shot off.
Swing your dicks bro, I guess.
I’ve been bathing in a sea of existential ennui today as i wonder have I even achieved that much in my journey. I have learned ways to improve over the years. I’m not so awkward at shooting models, 5 years ago tho nigga i was trash.
So much trash.
But for the most part all I did was events which weren’t much of a challenge. None, no such challenge exist. The bond with my camera has gotten closer in terms of technical skills. I’m not the best but i def know more than i did 5 years ago. MAN the shoots i’ve done and the journeys to complete them have felt like quest in JRPGs. Some I would redo just for the sake of a new skill level.
Spoiler Alert, I still am on the search of the last 2 infinity stones that I started search for at the tail end of 2017. UGH. Unfortunately, i don’t think i will get them this year…its a another jrpg side quest it seems.
Might as well segue off JPRG and link it to my comic that i started in the fall of 2016.
Man. MAAAAN. MAAAAAAAAAN.
That has been the bulk of the past 5 years, legitly. The irony is when 2016 started was hoping to have a stable job and not bounce from cotton field to cotton field. But here I am thanking life for all the times I was not working, because without it I wouldn’t have gotten as much as done.
Here I am hoping for another employment break so I can finish the last 8 issues. Thats right 8 issues are left for me to color. Being quarantined because of Covid at the end of April, Early May def helped. If i can get at least 1 page done a day I should reach my goal of finishing before the end of 2022.
If life stops distracting me with these ordeals I can go back to focusing on what is important to me.
When it is over, honestly I just want to be a real boy. Of chilling, playing video games, and no big major projects. I miss that portion of my life. That may not ever truly return but at least I won’t have a major project looming over my head anymore.
There will be projects surely, but not a project that is at least 1000 pages.
FUCK! *Tyler the Creator voice.
Despite what you just read, I still love my story with all my heart.
Will I ever do another comic series? Honestly I don’t know. I want to say no because of how arduous this one has been, but random storyboard thoughts and character design flow through my head. If I did do it, It would be way shorter than my current saga or I would be paid for it.
But what I do have planned art wise are the following.
A store with art products I’ve designed. Literally the only thing I have to do is make said products and the store.
Yes, amid all the craziness of this spring I got my book in one of the local book stores here. Nigga when I got the email I screamed like Will Smith did in various episodes of Fresh Prince of Bel Air.
YEET TO THE GAWDZ!!!!
Right now I’m playing email tag with the owner. Hopefully things will go smoother since Retrograde is over.
Also more art shows. At this point i’ve done 4 and I dare say I’m getting use to them, Kinda. The next time I hope I have aforementioned merchandise ready.
Moral of the story; Jano is on the way to becoming an Icon that will make you yeet so hard cum will leak from your organs. I def need to get some photoshoots of me done for the sake of my narcissism and my website.
May this lead to me getting my Jrpg comic saga animated and so much more.
With that being said thats it for now. Next month I’ll pick back up on my photo journey with the shoots I’ve done this year so far. They are not chaotic in the slightest in the terms of what I have gone through for the shoots of summer 2017.
If you were helpful to me on this journey in the last 5 years Thank you. If not and you pissed me off…fuck you and everything you stand for.
Also big shout to Spotify for being there as I work on all my projects, and slowly learning my music habits. I appreciate you and your creepy ways.
Hail to the Guardians of the watch tower, Sun, Moon, star, North, south, east and west. Please help me achieve all my art dreams, those spoken and not spoken of. Let my life being balanced of art, joy, relaxation and no stress.
MAN, I want to have one month this year without car problems. Actually no, not just one. Several months. My car has been stalling on me faithfully, and It hurts.
Oh how it hurts so much.
UGH, so much fucking UGH. At least this time I was in my driveway and not on the highway.
Yea that was a thing. A horrible fucking thing.
2021 is almost making me miss 2020. At least in 2020 there wasn’t this reoccurring issue.
Anyway Its adventure time. C’mon tell a friend.
Side note, I’m hoping the next issue will be a more joyful intro. The ironic thing is I actually have really good news to share.
Spoiler Alert, that may get its own issue.
So back in the fall of 2018, I started working at what I call Cotton field 10. When I started it was ok I guess, but then ya know the whole throat swelling up because I was allergic to the actual job thing happened. Fuckers.
At some point I saw this guy and I literally thought….this nigga is dressed like a black Dracula. My nigga had on something that looked like Velvet, ole smooth as looking nigga. At some point him and I ended up working on the same shift and we became friends. Side note, he is one of the reasons I ended up being in my first art show.
AWWW tender moments.
Fast forward to fall 2020 I hit up said Dracula looking nigga asking would he be down to model for me, and he was.
Ok, so I forgot to mention this is actually another chill issue with no type of drama what so ever. This like what the 5th one this year. This is so odd for me. Is this what peace feels like? Or at least a semblance of peace? Nevermind the projects I still have to do.
At any rate we coordinated our schedules between our new different cotton fields. He told me he would need me to pick him up, which was fine considering he is helping with a random artist vision of mine of a nigga in the woods.
No really, thats was the vision.
I went to go pick him up on a not so cold as fuck December day. It was nice to see him again, it was. The last time I saw him was during super slave season when he quit that raggedy ass cotton field. I drove up to the location where I did the mermaid saga, but on the other side. I had walked the other side a few times during the unemployed summer of 2018. It was a bit difference from the other side, the key difference of having a well, a bridge, and some type of camp site that may or may not have been haunted.
We jumped right into it. Now equipped with new knowledge of how my fucking lens worked, I found myself switching between all 3 of my lens. It is nice to be loaded with new information, but the lens switching process became tedious after a while as we traversed through the dead leaf trail.
Honestly that may be the most conflict in this whole issue, and I’m ok with that.
Wait no, at some point I saw that the fucking well was no longer there. Aggravated, aggravated as fuck. That was so key in my mind. Nigga I was bothered. Like angry Vegeta yelling bothered. UGGGGH.
Niggas out here really taking the time to disassemble a well. There is a whole ass super virus fucking up humanity and you raggedy motha fuckas wanna break a well. Bitch go buy some legos and do some other shit.
Ok, I’m done.
As we walked to the other side he started to tell me about his love life. The crushes, the heartbreaks, the emotions felt and the cascade of sorrow that swept him under at times. It was very touching, and the emotions he felt as he told his story translated on his face as he shot him.
You never really know someone until you walk with them in the woods and take their pictures for an artistic vision of yours.
When it was all done I drove him back home, said our goodbyes, and laid the fuck down. At this time Masta had me shucking and jiving at 4 fucking am. NIGGAS ARE TIIIIIED.
That is actually the last photoshoot of the trying times of 2020. WOOOOOOO, lucky I survived it. Legit lucky I survived it, shit was a long ass black mirror episode no one asked to be part of.
Speaking of photoshoots (of the sorts), I had my fourth art show today. Man a nigga yeeted today. Literally as we were about to leave a swarm of bikers came toward the end, just to get pictures of us.\
ON KAMI NIGGA. I’ve never felt so flabbergasted in my life. A literal group of people I’ve never met in my life came to support me and my 2 friends who are local artist. Shit is pretty dope. I need to get better in being in front of the camera. I’m use to being behind it in case you haven’t noticed.
I guess I we are at the point in the JRPG journey were I need to level up my in front of camera stats.
I don’t know if thats a thing, but right now in this moment we are going to make it a thing.
First and fucking foremost, I Miss DMX. HOLY FUCK His death hurt. FUCK. Fuck Prince Phillip, that nigga did nothing for my life like DMX. Shit.
Man here we are still in a pandemic. Here we are still trying to avoid a super virus. Here we are trying to avoid a super virus and racism.
Well, some of us.
*Deep exasperated sigh*
So fucking exhausting. Meanwhile I am trying to navigate through the aforementioned lanes, and multiple other avenues of life. MAN I wish knew getting my life together was going to be this complicated years ago…wait did I? I don’t know if I would have stuck around for it.
No really. I’m pretty fucked up. Spoiler Alert.
Meh, but I do like JRPG and that is what I am defining this art journey which I roughly started 5 years ago.
FUCK!! The concept of time is wild. Drive slow homie.
Thats right this is a JRPG. if you know what that stands for man I really fuck with you. If not well google it, I’ll still be here.
What started with a simple quest of me wanting to get better with posing people since I had only really done events, has morphed into…whatever the fuck this is. Am I even close to the final boss? Or am I on a string of side quest with no real end sight? Honestly I have no fucking idea.
I did have a realization that the last summer I had where I didn’t obsess over projects was Summer 2016. So the goal is, as surprising as this may sound considering how much I abhorred that year, is to be as free as I was that blasphemous year.
Whew Chile, that was a sentence that really came out of my mouth. Ok, we are here now.
But I legit just miss playing video games without having some sense of guilt and existential dread/ crisis/ ennui….all of the the existentialism I’ve felt it. Deep, DEEP In my chest.
Hopefully I can consolidate lanes and reach a destination in Jano’s Bizarre Art Adventure.
Yo on Kami, sometimes my metaphors come out so smooth I get a lil moist and juicy.
Anyway, none of that has anything to do with this months issue. None, no such bearing on this issue exist.
This months issue is a peaceful, wholesome issue that occurred during the trying times of 2020. I said fucking wholesome nigga. Translation, nothing to do with my quest to get any of the infinite stones. Yea those things.
Spoiler Alert, It is going to be a while until that guantlet is complete.
Honestly, don’t hold your breath.
This issue is a rare moment where my personal life and my art journey intersect in this Venn diagram, henceforth here we are.
Do you remember the Portal issue? No? Ok go read that if ya didn’t. And if you did well congrats for keeping up with my life. Well her and I celebrated our 1 year anniversary at the tail end of last June.
Awww Jano thats sweet.
Yea tender moments and all that. Well to celebrate we went to Charleston, a place I was going to treat myself when I completed my gauntlet, but ya know that ain’t happened. Plus Charleston is expensive especially when you don’t make shit and you are saving to quit a cottonfield that makes your throat lump up.
Smh fuckin’ horrible bro.
But we went down there on a whim, it felt nice to go esp after I finished coloring Act 2 of my comic series, and it was a legit goal of mine. I went in 2014 as part of a staff retreat but I didn’t get to enjoy it. This time, yea I did.
During our visit we went to an aquarium. YAAAAS to marine life. YAAAAAAS. This lil nigga gets excited about fish, judge me if you want I don’t give a shit. At some point during our visit one of the guides told us that if we liked this one we would enjoy the Georgia Aquarium in Atlanta. So fast forward to early August we went to Atlanta for her bday.
On kami, that aquarium was huge.Thoughts I had as our hotel was right across from it. Part of the reason it had such girth was because it was the home of whale sharks. Which she made her goal to swim with.
Yea.Swim with Whale Sharks.
Jano, did you do it too?
If I did, who would have taken the images that you are about to look at? Do you really think I will place someone else art work on MY website. Nigga bye.
1. I can’t swim
2. Anxiety and terror are a real thing.
3. I still was unemployed at this time, and it wouldn’t be fair to have her spend that large of an amount on something I wasn’t that excited to do. Tickets were at least in the 230-250 range. Sometimes I am decent person, sometimes.
She bought her ticket early on and literally had the entire day until that episode of adventure time aired. Until then we toured the rest of the aquarium. Ya’ll I saw dolphins, turtles, and octopi. Nigga I yeeted.
The time came and she armored up to dive with those behemoths. We were escorted to the top of a tank, meanwhile I chilled in an area designated for those who were accompanying the divers. The experience last for at least an hour. They were told they could no touch the sea spawn as a sign of respect. She told me swimming wasn’t necessary, the gear they was issued out kept you floating without any work on your part.
I still feel like I would have panicked and drowned. As I said anxiety and terror are a very real thing. Very real.
Anyway to see this Marine level excursion with whale sharks and manta rays go here.
Like I said , this is a pretty peaceful issue.
Join me next time when…..eh just come back in a month. I’m too tired to do a preview.
No really, I ran errands all day and its now 2:42 am, and I’m supposed to have a shoot tomorrow. Supposed to.
Shit, I just woke up and the original intro I had for this issue is a blank to me now.
FUCK, I had a clear monologue prepared from picking cotton today and now its a blur.
Eh, oh well.
*Boyz II Men End of the Road plays in the background. No Literally its playing, Spoiler Alert.
Guys, this is it…Kinda.
Its finally happened, I’ve caught up with all the photoshoots I’ve done since I began this journey since July 2016. Kinda.
Jano, explain all these kindas.
When I started when this photography part of my art journey, the whole point was to gain experience working with models because for the bulk of my life has been me doing events, What ensued the summer of 2016 was a myriad of quests of trying to capture ideas with the lens of my camera. There are a few side quest I am still pursing, but for right now I am all caught up with all my adventures.
I do have images from doing a workshop for the nonprofit organization Back To Black, and from my New Years Florida vacation but those are just events to me. Not to say that I won’t do events any more but 1. they don’t feel essential to my art quest, and 2. at this point right now they feel like filler episodes. And personally I am not a fan of filler episodes, I will not be like Naruto.
I rather be like Attack on Titan, Seven Deadly Sins, Fairy Tail, and My Hero Academia and have off seasons and come back when I have something significant.
From this point on the monthly issue format you have gotten accustomed to will dissipate into the ether, and I will be updating this site on a more random sporadic basis. It’ll be ironic that even after I make this issue that I still have monthly issues.
In the meantime, I’ll be focusing on coloring my comic series. I had this bad habit in recent months of saying I would get my issue out at the beginning of the month so that I could get it out the way. But obviously there were times I wouldn’t and my foolish mindset was to focus only on that and nothing else would get done since that was the only thing I was focused on.
Smh at my damn self and my raggedy thought process.
Also with that being said I’m not accepting any commissions of any sorts, not that I had an influx of orders or anything.
I’ll still be updating my social media channels (see side navigation) with images every month from previous adventures, and if you don’t follow me on anything then subscribe via email (see side navigation) to be notified when the updates occur.
In the meantime check out this issue, to help me fundraise for my comic quest.
For now guys that’s it, see ya’ll again hopefully…..maybe…….
The frigid season of winter is damn near, but it already feels like the bottom of a frozen ocean. FUCK MAN. So far the only good thing that has happened this month is that I got to see Incubus in concert.
At various points before they started playing I thought how I wish Gym Class Heroes was still a thing like Incubus, Fall Out Boy, Panic at the Disco and everyone else. Can someone make this a thing.
Anyway, honestly this is gonna be a brief and easy issue. And by brief and easy I mean itisn’t dramatic as fuck as much as my other issues about my art journey. Thats right this issue will be inadvertently family friendly for the holidays.
One blazing as fuck summer day this summer, one of my friends texted me saying that she wanted to do pictures of her son. That sounds doable. We started discussing slave schedules and locations. She texted me a location that she saw on her mail route, but was open for other locations. Since data limits were a thing for me this year, I waited til I got home to google the area.
Not gonna lie, I wasn’t impressed…at all.
And I told her that. I suggested Freedom Park the same place where I shot (Insert issue link here) since 1.It actually has more visually as opposed to an open grass field with a raggedy ass swing that the original park had and 2. It would be more for her son to interact with.
She was down for it. We set a date for a Friday afternoon in August. I left the cotton field, grabbed a sandwich from Harris Teeter and headed to the park.
I told ya’ll this is a really simple story.
I waited for her to arrive. She called me at some point because she wasn’t sure of the area. Eventually she showed up and we walked into the park.
Remind me to never to do a photoshoot of a child after picking cotton all day.Lil dude was an energy dynamo, like Finn from Adventure Time. On god nigga, On god. I was struggling to keep up, but I took solace in the fact how much I was gonna pass out when I got home.We were there for 2 hours at best, and we dispersed to separate paths and life.
See like I said this a real simple issue. To see the jubilation of my friends child click here.
Anyway this is probably gonna be last issue of the year. I had hoped to release another one before the year was out, but the way my slavery schedule is looking and the physicallimits of this human vessel I inhabit that may not happen.
Hopefully I can, but spoiler alert don’t hold your breath.
Hopefully 2020 I will accomplish more of my goals on my journey. To be honest I am so disappointed with myself. I still have 2 stones left that have yet to acquire. If you have been paying attention to these issues and know about Thanos, I really appreciate ya’ll I do. If not well, go back and do some reading.
Need some guidance on stone journey? Well here ya go the stones I collected purple, pink, blue and green. Honestly the other issues I released this year were just, well for a lack of better words filler issues.
As far as my comic saga Azure Ascendance, Man I’m so irked that I didn’t get as far as I wanted. Real shit this job exhaust the shit out of me, a nigga just wants to color like its 2016, that’s it. And ya know eventually get it animated on a streaming service,
Thats it.Ya know simple things.
Spoiler Alert, depending on how the next few months go will determine if I will be releasing issues monthly as I have the past few years. I’m literally all caught up in my photo journey after the next issue.
Hail to the Guardians of WatchTower
Sun, Moon, star, north, south, east and west.
Osiris my king
Hekate my queen
Let 2020 be a more productive year for my photography. Let me acquire the last 2 stones, as well the other shoots that I want to do.Free me from this current cotton field and please let me be able to workon my comic series, Azure Ascendance and release issues on a more steady rate. While eventually working toward a way to get my series animated in the way I imagine.
First and fucking foremost, I am legit upset that I didn’t get superpowers from this spider bite on my leg. The only thing I got is 1. immense fragging pain 2. probably a huge bill for going to the Emergency Room for the first time in years, and 3. I didn’t get to wear my Vegeta costume that I ordered for Halloween last year, but didn’t arrive until after aforementioned Holiday because I was passed out in pain. NO NIGGA WE AIN’T YEETING HERE.
Maybe later in this issue but at this current point, nope this is a yeet free zone.
So for those who have not been paying attention on any of my social media channels and never clicked on my about me page. The picture above is of me, and I just did my first art show. I know right I am a pretty dude, and thank youuuuuu.
The lead up to this was legit unexpected but deeply appreciated it.
Side note, to avoid the excessive use of pronouns I will be referring to some people by their IG names.
So September day whilst I was picking cotton, well making sure the cotton was up to par before it got sent out to random cunts who I’ll probably never meet. One of the field slaves I shuck and jive with, PurpleKloudz, randomly started talking, ya know about anime, art, dreams to be chased and nigga shit. He was telling me how one of his goals was to be in an art show before the year is over, I was like yooooo go ahead and follow your dreams. As the convo went on,I found out it was an anime and art show that he was going to be in.
Hold up, I like anime and I’m an artist. The voices of my ancestors told me I needed to be part of this. Spoiler Alert, When the voices of your ancestors speak you listen, always.
I asked him for more details and how I could be a part of it, he said he would talk to our other slave we shuck and jive with for the scraps master give us, JohnnyLovely.
Look I get it, I am laying it on thick with the slave cotton field references, but I legit work in a plantation that contains majority cotton so I am allowed to say these things. Hella allowed, especially since this is my damn site.
So at some point after a day of picking cotton, me and both of the aforementioned fellow slaves had a nerd gathering in the parking lot. Thats where it went down. YEET YEET.
JohnnyLovely told me about how this is the second anime and art show that his friend was having. I asked could I show any of my pieces, and he was like ummmm idk. Fuck it, I’ll try anyway and I did. He gave me the information of the person who was orchestrating the event. I sent him the links to all of my galleries, ALL of my galleries. Need a reminder, no problem. Starting from oldest to the most recent we have Miasmic Emancipation, Velvet Sweaters,Numinously Noir, Emerald Evisceration and oh yeah my house party invites just for good measure.
And he said I was in. YEET YEET NIGGA. Actually Yeet didn’t really do justice for how excited I was, especially when you hear people saying you shouldn’t draw the things you draw. Well fuck you naysayers, especially those I am genetically linked to.
The next step was to choose which images I wanted to display. Eventually I chose the 3 below.
Yep that last one was def chosen. Not gonna lie the process was hard. When it was all said and done,I hit up one of my friends I use to pick cotton with at another field a few years ago. I asked him would he mind printing out my images for the show, and he said sure. It was going good but due to the amount of colors I use in my drawings, I kinda killed his blue printhead. Yea, I wasn’t expecting that. So for images 2 and 3, I had to go to Office Max to get those printed out. Pretty sure they were confused and concerned about what I had them make.
As if I give a fuck, Spoiler Alert I don’t.
I got my frames and bam, I was all set.Since I finally got my images printed and frame I could actually start posting ads for it on social media. The last thing I wanted to do was post I was going to be in an art show and not have my stuff ready. The day before I met with the organizer of the show, and briefly dropped off the above pieces along with some small ones I had made when I did the pop art show in 2017. I got home, did my hair because my hair was an arid dry mess, and passed the fuck out.
The day of the show came, and I wish I requested off. I was excited, legit excited as fuck. Me and my girl left the cotton field, grabbed food from Chick Fil A, and went back to my place. I changed first then she did. Joy is when you get to wear a shirt you ordered a month ago for the first time at a kool event that you are in.While she did I meditated, because sometimes you got to do that before something major in your life is about to happen. On the way there I legit was trying to find a song to amp me, this is the bad thing about primary listening to somber music. I did find some pleasure in Rapsody’s Nina and Cleo and J.Cole’s Middle Child. In hindsight I wish I remembered Awerooh’s- Its My turn now, that was my shit, 3 years ago when I was developing my website.
Eh, maybe next time.
We got to Camp North End, did a brief photoshoot before we headed to the event. Yo, real shit I am legit awkward in front of a camera, I am. Yea I take selfies but full body poses aren’t a thing I’m use to doing, even though I tell others what to do when I am behind the lens. The event didn’t start until 7, but I wanted to be there to see the set up process and place flyers for my site, and a copy of my book series for people to view.
The night flew by after that honestly. Lush Lofi flowed in the background,feeling as if I was in an episode of Samurai Champloo. Her and I walked around for a while at some point we saw our fellow slaves who were also having their art exhibited, the one’s told me about the show. As the night went on, I was both the subject and the usual detached observer while I took photos of the event. Its a weird feeling since I am never am the subject of an event.
I promise sometimes I feel like I am the unborn child of Samantha White and Lionel Higgins from Dear White People.
Our other slave friends showed up, and we were all like AWWW SHIT NIGGA. She helped get people to look at book, Yaaaaaaas honey Yaaaaaaas. In case anyone hasn’t noticed I’m shy as shit, so her amping me up defiantly helped my spirit. My friend who printed one of my images came with his wife and daughter, and at some point the 5 of us walked around. Eventually we doubled back to the event and they head out.
Another slave showed up, who I met in an odd way. Well not really odd considered the digital word we live in. We work at the same place, but our first interaction was when she liked a post I did of me starting a book on AfroFuturism by YTasha L. Womack.
I still need to finish that book.
At the time I didn’t know who she was, until one day at work I was stopped and she was like I think I liked your post. Oh shit, wasn’t ready. The convo couldn’t last long because if masta see’s us lil field niggas not picking his cotton we gets in bigs trouble, and we don’t wants no trouble.
But Jano, how is this relevant to the story?
I’m about to get to that, impatient ass.
She showed up with her daughter, and she was thoroughly impressed with the pieces that me and our fellow field slaves had to put up. From the perspective that we had worked hard to create something, and going to the extra effort of making our work being seen to the public something that some people hesitate to do. The fact that the artist space was primarily created by and for black artist thrilled her more. Thrilled her to the point that she felt inspired to do something similar and create an AfroFuturism con here in Charlotte.
Now you get the relevance.
Oh shit, that would be awesome. I’ve been hoping to do shows especially black themed sci fi art shows, it would be an added bonus if there was one here in Charlotte. Hopefully this will manifest into something flourishes, heavily.
The night trickled on, at some point there was a group photo taken of me and the other artist. Still awkward as hell for me to pose, so fucking awkward. After that me and some of the people I pick cotton with went on to go play Cards Against Humanity. I bounced back to the event to get my prints, at some point the dude who organized all this said there would be another one in March. Nigga I’m so down.
And thats it. I was talking with JohnnyLovely a few times before the day of the show. At some point he said a black art renaissance is heading towards Charlotte, and after this I can see it happening. Another conversation, I made reference to Dear White People, how after the Black Face Party there were a series of events that occurred after and it affected everyone differently. My ancestors say that both of our feelings are accurate. Was this event an adequate save point and it will propel me into another direction that will benefit me greatly or will I stagnate and float on in a void of despair?
Spoiler Alert, either result will be chronicled here as usual.
Hopefully this clearing will lead to an oasis that splinters many paths of abundance. In the meantime to see photos from the even go here.
Pretty sure this was a big save point in my art journey. Speaking of save points I’m gonna resume from the one in Final Fantasy 7 and hopefully beat it before the year is over. Also next issue we will go back to the regular flowing timeline. This was an omg I need to talk about it now so my spirit can go back to chill mode, and I have.
This has been a sporadic and slaveful as summer,at least for me. FUCK. Kanye West Spaceship is legit playing both in my head and on my Spotify Can my Azure Ascendance spaceship come in and so I can fly away and do art things instead.
This saga actually isn’t complicated, compared to some of the others I’ve shared. Its just more so a matter of waiting.
It literally started Spring 2017 with a white girl.
But Jano, how did it go from white girl to your friend we have seen model for you 3 times who clearly isn’t white?
Well if you shut the fuck up you will find out :).
At some point in Spring 2017 when I was unemployed as fuck, yep that unemployment streak that started January 2016. MAN that was an arduous time.
I random white girl followed me on IG. At the time I was not posting anything on any social media platform. At the time my mindset I wasn’t gonna post anything until I got a full time job finally…
HA I was foolish.
Anyway because of that some of the most recent things I posted were photos of cosplay images. She DM’d me saying she would like to do a cosplay shoot, and me at the time who has not done one yet was down.
What followed was a series of events that made me more so loose patience with humanity, more so.
For those who weren’t paying attention, I wasn’t employed at the time.Employment didn’t happen until mid April and lasted until Early June. Followed by me being unemployed for 2 weeks, working for a month, then unemployed again until September. All of which, except for the 1st weekend of new slavery, I had the weekends off.
I would hit her up multiple times, and yet despite it being her idea she was never available. I appreciated her actually replying but at the same time I was irked. From the time period of Mid July to September, asking became ridiculous. She would tell me that she had alot going on, but then her IG stories would have a caption of going to meet a photographer. Days later it would be photos up of her in the outfit from the IG stories from said photographers.
Ya’ll listen, the older I get the less fucks I give.
I’m not gonna continue to chase people down for something that was their idea. I’m not.That mindset translate into a lot of things these days. I don’t have the time nor patience from it.
If you have an idea that you want done, and you don’t make an effort to make it happen. I.E. if I keep asking and the only thing you tell me is you’ll let me know, I’ll let it go.
During the mermaid saga when I finally had my model solidified. I told my homegirl about the aforementioned treachery, and she told she would do a cosplay photoshoot for me.
So let me publicly gush for once. She is legit my favorite model out of all the people I worked with.
She is, she drove down to help me out multiple times to help me fulfill my art dreams and was willing to do it again. I’m sorry none of you others can compare to her at all. Some of you may be mad, but I don’t give a fuck. If I actually get to shoot any of them more than once for another idea of mine I will be surprised. So to my homegirl I want to say you are the best, and I’m glad we met at that winter comic convention in 2013. Whenever I see you again I owe you food for all the times you helped when I was unemployed, plus you left your brush here.
Tender moments are over.
Back to this journey.
Even though she had agreed to help me out, it wasn’t that a simple thing. No major reason, just schedule conflicts. We both were working retail, and even when my schedule switched to weekend availability in the Spring of 2018 she still wasn’t able to make it down. Which sucked because I did have an idea to do it during the Spring while the trees were blooming new leaves for the year after a frigid callous winter.
Eventually August 2018, it happened after the original agreement was formed in September 2017. The day came and she arrived at my house, it took a minute before we actually did the shoot. I was recovering from a lush filled night, ironically enough when I did the masquerade shoot it was the day after I drank on a Sunday in August too.
She prepared herself make up wise, while I got my equipment ready. I drove to downtown where I envisioned this happening. The weather was perfect, as in I didn’t have to worry about her dying from heat exhaustion. It was a cloudy chill day so neither of us would sweat our spirits away.
Nothing extraordinary happened. She knew more about the character than I do, so my usual look at Pintrest for posing ideas was useless. The only other things that happened was that children thought that she was kool and wanted pictures with her. There was this one nigga, who was exactly that a nigga. I regret letting him take a photo with her, his last words were that picture will get ya’ll famous.
Negro please I didn’t even edit that nonsense.
I reject thou niggatry with the greatest power of the force.
We ended the shoot since she hadn’t eaten all day. We had talked about doing a night shoot but that didn’t happen. Partially because I was afraid it would be a repeat of what happened in Incandescent Spirits, the other half was because niggas were tired as fuck. OMG, I really need to start stretching before I shoot people I do.
At any rate, we went to get something to eat. She introduced me to Poke’bowls and Poke’ Burritoes. OMFG, they are so great. Blessed Be Korean food. We went back to my house and hung out, while she played her favorite songs.
Ugh, I just remembered how she played that foolishness of Kanye West Lift Yourself…OMG. I legit didn’t think it was him, and I’m upset I heard it.. A far from cry from Spaceship I mentioned earlier.
Someone save Kanye from Kanye
At any rate to see the images from that day click here.
On another note, this is actually the photoshoot I did of 2018. Not by choice, not by choice at all. As far “Infinity Stones” go, at this point I have 3 of the 6 I am determined to get. Other shoots were supposed to happen, but ya know life and peoples fickleness.
Moral of the story, Don’t trust white girls who slide and your DM’s. As well don’t chase anyone down when it is their idea.
Next issue will take place in 2019. I am almost caught up with time…or something…whatever…..
Spiderman on Ps4 is a great game, I haven’t beaten it at all but I like what I’ve done so far. I def need to finish Final Fantasy 7 before I fully emerge myself into this masterpiece.
Speaking of Masterpieces
I’m finally releasing Azure Ascendance Issue 2.
But Jano why the delay?
Yea well a lot of things, but thats not really important, ie I don’t feel like typing all that. I will say that I can finally afford the copyright for this issue. Point of the story is that I am releasing the next chapter of my saga which I conceived in the demon year of 2016.
At any rate lets dive into Issue 2.
Watatsumi and other members of the Posei Kingdom recover in the hideout of their unknown masked assailant. As they wonder how they will save Princess Yosei, threats loom within the enemy camp that threaten her life. Will the Posei Kingdom be able to save her in time? Or will Yosei fall prey to more anguish than she has already experienced?
I’m so excited to put the next issue out, I hoping to go at a faster rate. But fuck adulthood and having a job. I wonder is this how TeamFourStar feels when they produce videos.
Anyway to see a preview page, go here. And to actually purchase the issue venture forth to Amazon here.
And with that being said we now go back to our regular scheduled program. In the meantime I’ll be web slinging my spirit away or maybe I’ll finally finish Final Fantasy 7 so that I can enjoy Spiderman without wondering can I beat Sephiroth.
Sidenote, Fuck the whole PDF process that I have to go through to create this issue. The admin process is literally the worse.
Frag this shit, but at the same time I am glad to have it ooze out like juice out of a vagina.
Moist as fuck.
*Crosses Fingers that this gets me closer to having it animated on a streaming services, so I can stop working cotton fields that don’t feed my soul.
Damn its that time of year again. Time for that nigger heat, the heat that oppressed my ancestors my ancestors in the times of slavery.
So this issue is a lengthy one. Longer than the mermaid saga. This saga started September 2017 and ended June 2018.
So we are gonna skip how I don’t know how I feel about the series finale of Game of Thrones. Thats who rules over Westeros?? Never would have thought, even though apparently there were signs according to all the recent theories Google feels the need to suggest to me.
Anyway, make sure your wifi is on for this. It is a whole anime arc.
The saga of the summer projects ended, and the feeling was comparable to how the calm after big anime boss battles. Need examples that put your favorite heroes through hell, sure. Togoru, Sensui, Freeza, Majin Buu, The Dark Moon Clan, Lady Debonair, Mistress 9, Doflamingo, Apocalypse, Thanos, The Night King,Shredder (Not the 1990’s cartoon one, he was a joke), need I go on.
Niggas were exhausted, more so mentally than physically. I was over the whole model search and legit just wanted to chill, finish act 2 of my book series, play video games and beat my meat in bliss. Ya know simple shit.
That legit didn’t last long.
At some point in September a friend I use to pick cotton with at my least favorite plantation, (Ikea for those who don’t know my life), hit me up. He told me about a girl that he thought would be a good model for me. He sent me her IG profile and I agreed.
Honestly at this point in time I had no idea what I wanted to bring to life, legit didn’t. The only thing saw artistically was inking act 2 of Azure Ascendance, nothing else mattered. Never the less I messaged her and tried to think of a concept and a possible location.
I didn’t have shit. None, No such shit existed.
I would scroll on my IG timelines and would lean toward flowery and Japanese themes. At some point I even went to Plato’s Closet to browse for possible things I may want to use. We would communicate during this process, I know this sounds vague in contrast to my usual vivid details but this part of the saga is a blur to me. Maybe it was because I didn’t have clue where the fuck I was going, or maybe it was because the job I just started after not working for 9 weeks was having me wake up early as fuck to set up for halloween fuckery.
But one day I found a path to follow, and man it was a fucking path that will probably take a few hours to type. First google The Black Tape Project, go ahead I’ll wait.
This project has actually been in existence since 2013. When I saw it years ago I thought the concept was pretty kool and wanted to do something similar to it. Legit forgot all about it until one September day when I saw something pop on IG. In that moment abstract ideas I previously had amalgamated into one grand idea.
And when it did she stopped replying to my messages. Of course.
Jano, did you chase her down for this idea?
Nigga fuck no. After the war of summer 2017 my spirit no longer has no urge to chase people down who don’t want to be part of my life or art journey. She got one email to see if she was still down but after that, nah bruh.
So here I was with this idea with no one to shoot it with. Sadly even though I have mostly female friends, I’m pretty sure none of them would be down for me to cover their bodies in ribbons while being naked in front of me. Spoiler Alert, I’m the cutest loser you will ever meet.
So off to craigslist I go.
I knew what I wanted I wanted a brown, dark skin girl with natural hair. Usually I don’t have a preferred genotype for the ideas I’ve done but this time I did. Replies were scarce as fuck. But before we continue can someone tell me why this white woman replied when I clearly stated that I desire the opposite of her. I even had a picture as an example. NIGGGAAAA!!!!
Dear White People, when I say I want a brown skin female you don’t meet the requirements. Your basic Becky aesthetic can be taken elsewhere.
Anyway at some point that fall I considered one of my coworkers for the part since met the criteria. Since I got a possible model for this project I started the how the fuck am I going to pull this off part, because ya know that is important. First, my homegirl who I shot in the park, let me borrow her eldest daughters cotton candy machine. I actually didn’t use since the shoot took longer to do than expected, and I didn’t want stop her from making cotton candy. Second, since my mermaid cosplay friend, knows the way of cosplay culture I asked her what can I use to adhere ribbons to the skin that won’t cause any type of discomfort. She told me of a spray that I found in hobby lobby one day post cotton field. I tried it on myself while shopping, yea that shit stuck.
I had told my coworker that I needed to get her measurements and I needed to test the spray on her. We attempted to make plans for this to happen, did it tho? Nah, not at all. After several attempts I said fuck it, especially since she told me she had gotten a second job, and ironically the days we planned on something came up.
Spoiler Alert, I’m so over that happening in all avenues of my life.
At this point it is December 2017, and the idea of shooting someone outside who was only ribbon cladded was as dead as the flowers I hoped to capture as a backdrop in this saga. Plus not gonna lie I’m not a cold weather person, not all….unless I’m getting paid. So figured I’d aim to do the shoot in the spring.
The way my life goes it would probably be spring when I found someone.
The search continued. I thought I found a potential one but of course she fizzled out of existence too, honestly there isn’t a point in bringing her up. Another friend who I met during the the mermaid saga, was interested but decided against it for reasons I’m not mad at.
If you give me a legit reason why you don’t want to do a shoot, opposed to just vanishing out of my life after saying you were down I won’t cast stones. Its only when you ghost me do I throw stones, salt, shade and sarcasm. All the painful S’s. Especially if you don’t reply to my message but like my fucking post on social media.
Fast forward to March 2018. One of my homegirls who I shucked and jived with at the plantation wanted to get dinner, we met at Zoe’s Kitchen and talked about how our lives were going. I told her about the shoot I was trying to do, and asked did she have any friends that I may want to shoot for it. She pulled out her phone and showed me her coworker…OMG.
Nigga, I was floored. She was gorgeous, I told her I want her for my bday (no literally my bday was coming up soon) she would be a great gift so I could end this search. She told me she would ask her and man this mystic hybrid was hopeful as fuck. The next time I saw her was at my bday party the following week, and her friend was down.
Blessed Be!! Hail to the guardians of the watch tower.
I got her contact info, and we set up a meeting sometime during the following week.
Real Shit she was kool as fuck. I told her the whole project and was excited. She told me she never modeled before aside from this one thing at college where she was essentially the token black person on the college brochure. I took her measurements, and told her as it warmed up we could start thinking about a date. In the meantime I asked what her favorite type of candy was and liquor choices. She told me gummy bears and was down for any type of spirit consumption. As spring approached I bought a candy dish and a fan off Amazon. In May we met at Hobby Lobby one day post cotton field to see if the ribbons I wanted to use would be a good contrast on her. They won’t. The original intent was pastel colors but they appeared more sheer than anything. I chose 2 variations of the pink and purple I desired.
Side note, I like how after I actual found someone who I wanted and they solidified that they were down things flowed effortlessly.
When we got in the parking lot we talked about a date. She had told me that every Saturday in June she would be off in addition to the Tuesdays she is normally allotted off. We picked the Tuesday the 3rd week of June, and that Saturday as the back up date. In the meantime, my jobs project had ended and I began my 4 months of unemployment.
Not gonna lie,I legit kinda miss being unemployed. All I did was draw, chase my art dreams, eat and sleep in late. Sucks I couldn’t afford to turn on my a/c but I survived….somehow.
Anyway, at some point I fashioned a floral crown from supplies from Party City and Dollar Tree. Yay for the crown making experience points I gained during the mermaid epic. But the cape was a whole different thing. Spoiler alert, I don’t know how to sew, at all. Yay for my homegirls who told me about Hem tape and my cosplay friend who told me about chiffon because my cape may have not existed at all. Rigging the ornament of the cape was the hardest part. As the date came closer she bought a pair of shoes that were way better than anything I could have imagined.
The week came of the shoot FINALLY. OMFG, this took forever. If you think reading this was arduous try living it. That Monday I had called Mcgill Rose Garden to see that there were no events occurring the following day. This garden is legit kool as shit, however it is only open for a few hours a day and it is a popular place people like to have events. The last thing I need is for the background to be loaded with gawking people. That is way more editing than I prefer to do.
They told me no, so the rest of the day I spent buying gummy bears, making a new version of Jano Juice, buying a glass royalty would use and image training on how I wanted the shoot to go and hoped the awkward loss of words that occurred a few weeks prior wouldn’t repeat itself. At some point that night she called me to tell me that we couldn’t do the shoot the next day for a very good reason, her period came.
But Jano why does that matter?
Spoiler Alert, she is going to only be wearing ribbons. Only Ribbons. Pretty sure a females menstrual cycle involves light and heavy blood flow. And from what I heard the first few days are the heaviest, and the last thing that is desired is blood oozing from her while shooting. That is a whole lot of discomfort for her that can be avoided if we rescheduled. So we did for that Saturday. What is a few days compared to several months?
The day before I walked the venue again since I haven’t been there in months, and did the whole visualization thing. My only other hope was that the cops wouldn’t be called on us, that was def a thing last summer. Black people were getting the policed called on them for simple things like living, pretty sure someone would do it if they saw a black girl wearing only ribbons being shot by black photographer with a Black Dynamite Afro for following his dreams if they had the chance. On god my anxiety was high as fuck the night before.
Anyway, the morning came and I did not hear anything from her around the time we were supposed to meet up. My mind started to swell with fear and a million thoughts raced through my head. Was all this for nothing? Would she vanish on me like other models have the past few months? Fuck am I just trash to be thrown away so easily after all?
And those were only the nice thoughts.
I was having another existential crisis similar to what I had the past few months while trying to do other photoshoots, that to this day I still haven’t done 2 of the desired ones. Nigga its June 2019 still have yet to be done, the two aforementioned shoots were conceived October 2017 and January 2018. NIGGA!! A myriad of thoughts clenched my throat leaving me grasping for air, hoping to not drown in an ocean of depression again.
Yea I’m real fucked up and have a trash complex. Yay for conditioning.
Hold on, Let me breath.
I texted her hoping she had just overslept for good reason, and that was the case. The deepest sigh of relief came from me. But we only a had a few hours that the garden would be open. The goal was to be there by the time it opened, mainly to avoid human background traffic. Plus it would be less hot as fuck earlier in the morning, it would still be hot as fuck but not less as fuck. The place opened at 10, and that is when she got to my house around that time. She got to my place, stripped and I applied the ribbons as hastily as I could. There wasn’t any major issues, other than the adhesive getting stuck to me sometimes. I stuck to my design as much as I could, the application wasn’t as neat as desired but I knew I could fix it in photoshop. We got to the venue around 12ish, the place closes at 3.
Luckily barely anyone was there, the few that were there observed proper etiquette of staying the fuck out of our way. I poured her Jano Juice Volume 3 for effect, nice to know I can make good mixed drinks. If this art journey fails maybe I’ll be a bartender. I told her to channel the royal, bad and boujee side she keeps locked away. And she did successfully and elegantly. For someone who never modeled before she did a legit good job. It was worth the wait, of course I would prefer if my ideas didn’t take months to fucking flourish but whatever.
Anyway to see the culmination of my 10 month journey, go here.
That is the end of this epic, I would say saga but I feel epic is more appropriate given the length of time it took to do this. It damn near equated to a whole school year. Since this ribbon concept worked, hopefully I can do it again in another shoot. But will I? No seriously, I have no idea. I def want to but these model searches are so fucking taxing. If you are interested email me, with photos of yourself and please be in Charlotte, N.C.
Moral of the story; keep in touch with your friends from the cotton field they may help you follow your dreams.
Or something, infer what you want from this. Or not. I don’t care.
Thats it for now, I’m going to do something that doesn’t involve typing a narrative for 4 hours, like rewatch Durarara for the fourth time and getting for ConCarolinas.
Yea, I told you this was an epic.
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