Well here we are in 2022. I won’t be foolish enough to say that this will be my year and neither should you. Let us just hope for the best and brace for the worse. As Spike Spiegel said
“Whatever happens, happens.”
But i’m hoping i don’t loose my shit like I did in the extra trying times of 2021.
Holy fucking fuck of fuckdom, and we lost Betty White. SHIT!!!
Kinda wanna watch Golden Girls now. I’ve seen a few episodes but not enough to say I was a fan. But it was enjoyable. At some point I’ll watch it, some point.
I just jumped down The Witcher 3 hole. I saw my homeboy play it back in 2016, that and Dragon Age Inquisition but i chose the Dragon Age Path. Whenever I finish my book, i’m going to play through all the Dragon Age games thus far. I’m somewhere in 1 right now. At this point I’m hoping I finish my series before Dragon Age 4 comes out.Legit looking forward to playing games with no guilt again. So many games….to beat…so many….
Anyway time for Adventure time C’mon tell a friend.
The chaotic spring of 2021, shortly after me having Covid and in the midst of my car randomly shutting off on me….yea.
My non profit boss, who helped me do the groundwork for my store, decided that she was going to create a new shop.
YEEET.
Crystals, Candles, and all those other witchy related things that make your soul go
YAAAAAAAAS….or maybe that just me. Is it just me? Can’t be. This is a safe witch zone.
Omg Jano are you a witch?
Spoiler Alert.
I’ve been interested since i was fledgling, but I didn’t have money for a witch life style until cotton field 10.
Blessed be. But also fuck that job.
Anyway I told her if she helped me buy a photo light wand, I would help her do her product photography. Surprisingly she bought me a wand and here we are 7 months later. When I held the wand I felt like i was holding a light saber.
Use the Force Jano.
MAN It was so cool, so fucking kool. I yeeted as my meat leaked. I ordered myself another light saber because balance is a thing. When my Covid quarantine was over her and I agreed on the nearest Saturday. I packed my car with my newly acquired light sabers, light studio set, and all my witchy things.
“Ma I’ve been Hussling rocks” as Cam’ron said.
Ya know crystals, incense, sage cauldron, charcoal, and herbs. The basices.I drove to her house and we stopped by Dollar Tree to get a few other things.
And food, niggas need food to properly function in all aspects in life.
I like how my art interest and witchy interest intersected here. In this moment my life was a Venn diagram.
She had a piece of fabric that I used as a backdrop which helped with the mystic mood. I placed the products and props on the table and the light sabers on the adjacent side of the table. I shifted the colors to match the corresponding of each candle.As smoke flowed through each image as the water flows down a stream.
ISSA VIBE!!!
Ain’t that what the kids say?
I used my newly acquired tripod since I didn’t want a repeat of the headshots from last issue. Literally the only thing that moved in these images were the smoke, that it. No such other movement existed.
It was a fun 1-2 hrs for me. Product photography is interesting, at least this was since I am interested in this subject matter.
And that was the end of that. My metaphysical image buzz ended unfortunately as my car shut off on me while on the way home.
UGH.
Side note, I like how my photo journey in my car problems are synonymous for the early part of last year. Not really tho.
Anyway to see the images from this mystic day click here. And if you want things to help you with your occult journey and want to support black owned business, yonder over here.
I’m going to do my hair now, because that is what you do when your love your curls.
Here we are. You and I gazing into an abyss of the internet as I post a new page in my Bizarre Art Journey.
Nigga What???
I don’t know, i didn’t really have an actual opening plan so I just started spouting words.
As if.
Tonight we have a special occasion. I am releasing a new issue of comic series.
YEEEEEEET.
Small confession, I have literally been done with Issues 1-5 since Summer 2017.
But Jano why haven’t you been releasing them at a faster rate?
Legitly there is no real reason. Although I am glad I didn’t because just recently a friend went through the aforementioned issues and pointed out my grammatical errors. So much gringe. This is what happens when you work bullshit slave jobs after graduating, your sense of grammar and proper sentence structure dies.
So just in case you ever wondered why these issues have so many run on sentences and what not that is why.
As I was saying I don’t have an exact reason why I haven’t been releasing them, I don’t. Part of me wanted to have the whole series done, another part wanted to have a certain gap between issues. Now I literally have a ten issue gap seeing that i just finished coloring issue 13. As of right now I have only seven issues left with a total of 319 pages.
Spoiler Alert, this is only going to be a 20 issue series. If you wanted a new Naruto, DBZ, Sailormoon, Bleach or One piece this def isn’t it.
But i’m legit looking forward to finally coloring the next 7 issues, especially considering I did issues 11-20 in the summer of 2018.
Yea…So in case you haven’t figured it out coloring has been a journey. I blame cotton field fatigue for it all. What I hoped to finish in 4 years from the fall of 2016 has not manifested.
Issues 1-5 were done by spring 2017, issue 6 June 2019, Issue 7-10 summer 2020 (thanks lockdown), Issues 11-13 Fall 2020-Fall 2021.
Ugh. So much fucking ugh.
But since I actually have my book in a local bookstore and I just did the QC Zine fest, where people actually expressed interest in my book. I may actually try to release these in a faster rate. Maybe 1 every 2 months? Maybe, no promises. Hopefully I’ll be done with this JRPG saga before the releases catch up.
*does math…2025, that is if i drop an issue every 2 months from this point on. On kami if i’m not done with this saga by then I’m trash, legit trash.
Hey Google, play Charles Hamilton Loser.
Side note, if you are wondering what the final villain is gonna look like. Head towards my boutique and look at the current tshirt and prints I have for sale.
Super Final Battle JRPG Vibes bro.
With all that out of the way I present Level 3 of my comic book series Azure Ascendance.
*starts narrator voice
A battle royal begins. Coco, Boumei, Raiken, Coral and Kuchihige battle fiercely as Princess Yosei is still passed out from her recent ordeal. Meanwhile Watatsumi finds out the true identity of her masked savior. Truths are revealed as a battle rages on in another part of Azure while a new foe waits to ravage bodies indiscriminately.
*ends narrator voice
The intensity continues to build in this story my ancestors told me to write in a medium I was fond of growing up. At usual I have a preview page so that you can view.
And as usual you can find this issue on my publications page along with the back issues. I have the full witches intent to put an issue out every 2 months, especially since now this little hermit has people who are interested in this saga I’ve created. I need to do another show to keep this momentum growing.
As Namie Amuro…This is for all my fans.
Maaaan if I get people cosplaying my characters and get this animated I will yeet so hard I may cum.
First and fucking foremost, I Miss DMX. HOLY FUCK His death hurt. FUCK. Fuck Prince Phillip, that nigga did nothing for my life like DMX. Shit.
DAMN!!
So….ugh….lets continue.
Man here we are still in a pandemic. Here we are still trying to avoid a super virus. Here we are trying to avoid a super virus and racism.
Well, some of us.
*Deep exasperated sigh*
So fucking exhausting. Meanwhile I am trying to navigate through the aforementioned lanes, and multiple other avenues of life. MAN I wish knew getting my life together was going to be this complicated years ago…wait did I? I don’t know if I would have stuck around for it.
No really. I’m pretty fucked up. Spoiler Alert.
Meh, but I do like JRPG and that is what I am defining this art journey which I roughly started 5 years ago.
FUCK!! The concept of time is wild. Drive slow homie.
Thats right this is a JRPG. if you know what that stands for man I really fuck with you. If not well google it, I’ll still be here.
What started with a simple quest of me wanting to get better with posing people since I had only really done events, has morphed into…whatever the fuck this is. Am I even close to the final boss? Or am I on a string of side quest with no real end sight? Honestly I have no fucking idea.
I did have a realization that the last summer I had where I didn’t obsess over projects was Summer 2016. So the goal is, as surprising as this may sound considering how much I abhorred that year, is to be as free as I was that blasphemous year.
Whew Chile, that was a sentence that really came out of my mouth. Ok, we are here now.
But I legit just miss playing video games without having some sense of guilt and existential dread/ crisis/ ennui….all of the the existentialism I’ve felt it. Deep, DEEP In my chest.
*deep breath*
Hopefully I can consolidate lanes and reach a destination in Jano’s Bizarre Art Adventure.
Yo on Kami, sometimes my metaphors come out so smooth I get a lil moist and juicy.
Anyway, none of that has anything to do with this months issue. None, no such bearing on this issue exist.
This months issue is a peaceful, wholesome issue that occurred during the trying times of 2020. I said fucking wholesome nigga. Translation, nothing to do with my quest to get any of the infinite stones. Yea those things.
Spoiler Alert, It is going to be a while until that guantlet is complete.
Honestly, don’t hold your breath.
This issue is a rare moment where my personal life and my art journey intersect in this Venn diagram, henceforth here we are.
Do you remember the Portal issue? No? Ok go read that if ya didn’t. And if you did well congrats for keeping up with my life. Well her and I celebrated our 1 year anniversary at the tail end of last June.
Awww Jano thats sweet.
Yea tender moments and all that. Well to celebrate we went to Charleston, a place I was going to treat myself when I completed my gauntlet, but ya know that ain’t happened. Plus Charleston is expensive especially when you don’t make shit and you are saving to quit a cottonfield that makes your throat lump up.
Smh fuckin’ horrible bro.
But we went down there on a whim, it felt nice to go esp after I finished coloring Act 2 of my comic series, and it was a legit goal of mine. I went in 2014 as part of a staff retreat but I didn’t get to enjoy it. This time, yea I did.
During our visit we went to an aquarium. YAAAAS to marine life. YAAAAAAS. This lil nigga gets excited about fish, judge me if you want I don’t give a shit. At some point during our visit one of the guides told us that if we liked this one we would enjoy the Georgia Aquarium in Atlanta. So fast forward to early August we went to Atlanta for her bday.
On kami, that aquarium was huge.Thoughts I had as our hotel was right across from it. Part of the reason it had such girth was because it was the home of whale sharks. Which she made her goal to swim with.
Nigga what?
Yea.Swim with Whale Sharks.
Jano, did you do it too?
If I did, who would have taken the images that you are about to look at? Do you really think I will place someone else art work on MY website. Nigga bye.
Besides
1. I can’t swim
2. Anxiety and terror are a real thing.
3. I still was unemployed at this time, and it wouldn’t be fair to have her spend that large of an amount on something I wasn’t that excited to do. Tickets were at least in the 230-250 range. Sometimes I am decent person, sometimes.
She bought her ticket early on and literally had the entire day until that episode of adventure time aired. Until then we toured the rest of the aquarium. Ya’ll I saw dolphins, turtles, and octopi. Nigga I yeeted.
The time came and she armored up to dive with those behemoths. We were escorted to the top of a tank, meanwhile I chilled in an area designated for those who were accompanying the divers. The experience last for at least an hour. They were told they could no touch the sea spawn as a sign of respect. She told me swimming wasn’t necessary, the gear they was issued out kept you floating without any work on your part.
I still feel like I would have panicked and drowned. As I said anxiety and terror are a very real thing. Very real.
Very.
Fucking.
Real.
Anyway to see this Marine level excursion with whale sharks and manta rays go here.
Like I said , this is a pretty peaceful issue.
Join me next time when…..eh just come back in a month. I’m too tired to do a preview.
No really, I ran errands all day and its now 2:42 am, and I’m supposed to have a shoot tomorrow. Supposed to.
Damn its that time of year again. Time for that nigger heat, the heat that oppressed my ancestors my ancestors in the times of slavery.
FUUUUCK!!!!!
*deep breath
So this issue is a lengthy one. Longer than the mermaid saga. This saga started September 2017 and ended June 2018.
Riiiiight.
So we are gonna skip how I don’t know how I feel about the series finale of Game of Thrones. Thats who rules over Westeros?? Never would have thought, even though apparently there were signs according to all the recent theories Google feels the need to suggest to me.
Anyway, make sure your wifi is on for this. It is a whole anime arc.
The saga of the summer projects ended, and the feeling was comparable to how the calm after big anime boss battles. Need examples that put your favorite heroes through hell, sure. Togoru, Sensui, Freeza, Majin Buu, The Dark Moon Clan, Lady Debonair, Mistress 9, Doflamingo, Apocalypse, Thanos, The Night King,Shredder (Not the 1990’s cartoon one, he was a joke), need I go on.
Niggas were exhausted, more so mentally than physically. I was over the whole model search and legit just wanted to chill, finish act 2 of my book series, play video games and beat my meat in bliss. Ya know simple shit.
That legit didn’t last long.
At some point in September a friend I use to pick cotton with at my least favorite plantation, (Ikea for those who don’t know my life), hit me up. He told me about a girl that he thought would be a good model for me. He sent me her IG profile and I agreed.
Honestly at this point in time I had no idea what I wanted to bring to life, legit didn’t. The only thing saw artistically was inking act 2 of Azure Ascendance, nothing else mattered. Never the less I messaged her and tried to think of a concept and a possible location.
I didn’t have shit. None, No such shit existed.
I would scroll on my IG timelines and would lean toward flowery and Japanese themes. At some point I even went to Plato’s Closet to browse for possible things I may want to use. We would communicate during this process, I know this sounds vague in contrast to my usual vivid details but this part of the saga is a blur to me. Maybe it was because I didn’t have clue where the fuck I was going, or maybe it was because the job I just started after not working for 9 weeks was having me wake up early as fuck to set up for halloween fuckery.
Yay.
But one day I found a path to follow, and man it was a fucking path that will probably take a few hours to type. First google The Black Tape Project, go ahead I’ll wait.
This project has actually been in existence since 2013. When I saw it years ago I thought the concept was pretty kool and wanted to do something similar to it. Legit forgot all about it until one September day when I saw something pop on IG. In that moment abstract ideas I previously had amalgamated into one grand idea.
And when it did she stopped replying to my messages. Of course.
Jano, did you chase her down for this idea?
Nigga fuck no. After the war of summer 2017 my spirit no longer has no urge to chase people down who don’t want to be part of my life or art journey. She got one email to see if she was still down but after that, nah bruh.
So here I was with this idea with no one to shoot it with. Sadly even though I have mostly female friends, I’m pretty sure none of them would be down for me to cover their bodies in ribbons while being naked in front of me. Spoiler Alert, I’m the cutest loser you will ever meet.
So off to craigslist I go.
Again.
UGH,
I knew what I wanted I wanted a brown, dark skin girl with natural hair. Usually I don’t have a preferred genotype for the ideas I’ve done but this time I did. Replies were scarce as fuck. But before we continue can someone tell me why this white woman replied when I clearly stated that I desire the opposite of her. I even had a picture as an example. NIGGGAAAA!!!!
Dear White People, when I say I want a brown skin female you don’t meet the requirements. Your basic Becky aesthetic can be taken elsewhere.
Anyway at some point that fall I considered one of my coworkers for the part since met the criteria. Since I got a possible model for this project I started the how the fuck am I going to pull this off part, because ya know that is important. First, my homegirl who I shot in the park, let me borrow her eldest daughters cotton candy machine. I actually didn’t use since the shoot took longer to do than expected, and I didn’t want stop her from making cotton candy. Second, since my mermaid cosplay friend, knows the way of cosplay culture I asked her what can I use to adhere ribbons to the skin that won’t cause any type of discomfort. She told me of a spray that I found in hobby lobby one day post cotton field. I tried it on myself while shopping, yea that shit stuck.
I had told my coworker that I needed to get her measurements and I needed to test the spray on her. We attempted to make plans for this to happen, did it tho? Nah, not at all. After several attempts I said fuck it, especially since she told me she had gotten a second job, and ironically the days we planned on something came up.
Spoiler Alert, I’m so over that happening in all avenues of my life.
At this point it is December 2017, and the idea of shooting someone outside who was only ribbon cladded was as dead as the flowers I hoped to capture as a backdrop in this saga. Plus not gonna lie I’m not a cold weather person, not all….unless I’m getting paid. So figured I’d aim to do the shoot in the spring.
The way my life goes it would probably be spring when I found someone.
The search continued. I thought I found a potential one but of course she fizzled out of existence too, honestly there isn’t a point in bringing her up. Another friend who I met during the the mermaid saga, was interested but decided against it for reasons I’m not mad at.
If you give me a legit reason why you don’t want to do a shoot, opposed to just vanishing out of my life after saying you were down I won’t cast stones. Its only when you ghost me do I throw stones, salt, shade and sarcasm. All the painful S’s. Especially if you don’t reply to my message but like my fucking post on social media.
Fast forward to March 2018. One of my homegirls who I shucked and jived with at the plantation wanted to get dinner, we met at Zoe’s Kitchen and talked about how our lives were going. I told her about the shoot I was trying to do, and asked did she have any friends that I may want to shoot for it. She pulled out her phone and showed me her coworker…OMG.
Nigga, I was floored. She was gorgeous, I told her I want her for my bday (no literally my bday was coming up soon) she would be a great gift so I could end this search. She told me she would ask her and man this mystic hybrid was hopeful as fuck. The next time I saw her was at my bday party the following week, and her friend was down.
YAAAAAAAAAAAS.
Blessed Be!! Hail to the guardians of the watch tower.
I got her contact info, and we set up a meeting sometime during the following week.
Real Shit she was kool as fuck. I told her the whole project and was excited. She told me she never modeled before aside from this one thing at college where she was essentially the token black person on the college brochure. I took her measurements, and told her as it warmed up we could start thinking about a date. In the meantime I asked what her favorite type of candy was and liquor choices. She told me gummy bears and was down for any type of spirit consumption. As spring approached I bought a candy dish and a fan off Amazon. In May we met at Hobby Lobby one day post cotton field to see if the ribbons I wanted to use would be a good contrast on her. They won’t. The original intent was pastel colors but they appeared more sheer than anything. I chose 2 variations of the pink and purple I desired.
Side note, I like how after I actual found someone who I wanted and they solidified that they were down things flowed effortlessly.
When we got in the parking lot we talked about a date. She had told me that every Saturday in June she would be off in addition to the Tuesdays she is normally allotted off. We picked the Tuesday the 3rd week of June, and that Saturday as the back up date. In the meantime, my jobs project had ended and I began my 4 months of unemployment.
Not gonna lie,I legit kinda miss being unemployed. All I did was draw, chase my art dreams, eat and sleep in late. Sucks I couldn’t afford to turn on my a/c but I survived….somehow.
Anyway, at some point I fashioned a floral crown from supplies from Party City and Dollar Tree. Yay for the crown making experience points I gained during the mermaid epic. But the cape was a whole different thing. Spoiler alert, I don’t know how to sew, at all. Yay for my homegirls who told me about Hem tape and my cosplay friend who told me about chiffon because my cape may have not existed at all. Rigging the ornament of the cape was the hardest part. As the date came closer she bought a pair of shoes that were way better than anything I could have imagined.
The week came of the shoot FINALLY. OMFG, this took forever. If you think reading this was arduous try living it. That Monday I had called Mcgill Rose Garden to see that there were no events occurring the following day. This garden is legit kool as shit, however it is only open for a few hours a day and it is a popular place people like to have events. The last thing I need is for the background to be loaded with gawking people. That is way more editing than I prefer to do.
They told me no, so the rest of the day I spent buying gummy bears, making a new version of Jano Juice, buying a glass royalty would use and image training on how I wanted the shoot to go and hoped the awkward loss of words that occurred a few weeks prior wouldn’t repeat itself. At some point that night she called me to tell me that we couldn’t do the shoot the next day for a very good reason, her period came.
But Jano why does that matter?
Spoiler Alert, she is going to only be wearing ribbons. Only Ribbons. Pretty sure a females menstrual cycle involves light and heavy blood flow. And from what I heard the first few days are the heaviest, and the last thing that is desired is blood oozing from her while shooting. That is a whole lot of discomfort for her that can be avoided if we rescheduled. So we did for that Saturday. What is a few days compared to several months?
The day before I walked the venue again since I haven’t been there in months, and did the whole visualization thing. My only other hope was that the cops wouldn’t be called on us, that was def a thing last summer. Black people were getting the policed called on them for simple things like living, pretty sure someone would do it if they saw a black girl wearing only ribbons being shot by black photographer with a Black Dynamite Afro for following his dreams if they had the chance. On god my anxiety was high as fuck the night before.
Anyway, the morning came and I did not hear anything from her around the time we were supposed to meet up. My mind started to swell with fear and a million thoughts raced through my head. Was all this for nothing? Would she vanish on me like other models have the past few months? Fuck am I just trash to be thrown away so easily after all?
And those were only the nice thoughts.
I was having another existential crisis similar to what I had the past few months while trying to do other photoshoots, that to this day I still haven’t done 2 of the desired ones. Nigga its June 2019 still have yet to be done, the two aforementioned shoots were conceived October 2017 and January 2018. NIGGA!! A myriad of thoughts clenched my throat leaving me grasping for air, hoping to not drown in an ocean of depression again.
Yea I’m real fucked up and have a trash complex. Yay for conditioning.
Hold on, Let me breath.
FUCK.
I texted her hoping she had just overslept for good reason, and that was the case. The deepest sigh of relief came from me. But we only a had a few hours that the garden would be open. The goal was to be there by the time it opened, mainly to avoid human background traffic. Plus it would be less hot as fuck earlier in the morning, it would still be hot as fuck but not less as fuck. The place opened at 10, and that is when she got to my house around that time. She got to my place, stripped and I applied the ribbons as hastily as I could. There wasn’t any major issues, other than the adhesive getting stuck to me sometimes. I stuck to my design as much as I could, the application wasn’t as neat as desired but I knew I could fix it in photoshop. We got to the venue around 12ish, the place closes at 3.
Luckily barely anyone was there, the few that were there observed proper etiquette of staying the fuck out of our way. I poured her Jano Juice Volume 3 for effect, nice to know I can make good mixed drinks. If this art journey fails maybe I’ll be a bartender. I told her to channel the royal, bad and boujee side she keeps locked away. And she did successfully and elegantly. For someone who never modeled before she did a legit good job. It was worth the wait, of course I would prefer if my ideas didn’t take months to fucking flourish but whatever.
Anyway to see the culmination of my 10 month journey, go here.
*deep breath
That is the end of this epic, I would say saga but I feel epic is more appropriate given the length of time it took to do this. It damn near equated to a whole school year. Since this ribbon concept worked, hopefully I can do it again in another shoot. But will I? No seriously, I have no idea. I def want to but these model searches are so fucking taxing. If you are interested email me, with photos of yourself and please be in Charlotte, N.C.
Moral of the story; keep in touch with your friends from the cotton field they may help you follow your dreams.
Or something, infer what you want from this. Or not. I don’t care.
Thats it for now, I’m going to do something that doesn’t involve typing a narrative for 4 hours, like rewatch Durarara for the fourth time and getting for ConCarolinas.