Azuma Kara

09 Saturday Nov 2019

Tags

.exe, afroanime, afrocentric, Afrofuturism, afrofuturistic, afronovels, afropunk, ancestors, AndersonPaak, anime, animeaesthetic, animeart, animeartstyle, Animeinspired, artexhibit, artjourney, artofvisuals, artshow, aweeroh, AZUMAKARA, AzureAscendance, Banks, BBCBloggers, BBlogRT, blackcosplay, blackcreatives, blackfaceparty, blackgirlmagic, blackheroesmatter, blackmanga, blacknerdproblems, blackrenaissance, blacksciencefiction, blacksciencefictionsociety, blackscifi, blessedbe, bruja, campnorthend, cardsagainsthumanity, chakras, Charlotte, CharlotteArtist, chillmode, chronicles, cloe, cltshooters, cosplay, cottonfield, DBZ, dearwhitepeople, DeronHorton, dope, dragonballz, dreamville, earthgang, EmeraldEvisceration, fantasy, fantasyart, fatjon, finalfantasy7, followyourdreams, galleries, greentea, Halloween, houseparty, inspiration, invites, itsmyturnnow, J.Cole, JanoRyusaru, justinsimien, lionelhiggins, LoganBrowning, lushlofi, manga, march, march2020, meditation, melaninbloggers, melaninmagic, melaninpoppin, MiasmicEmancipation, Michiko, michikoandHacchin, middlechild, minthaze, Mixtape, nina, nujabees, numionouslynoir, OnePiece, punkblack, R.LUM.R, r.lum.rsurfacing, Rapsody, renaissance, renaussance, RickandMorty, SabrinaClaudio, sabrinaclaudiotruthis, samanthawhite, samuraichamploo, savepoint, Segasaturn, SevenDeadlySins, SinitusTempo, sketchbook, slavery, spoileralert, Spotify, spring, Toonami, urbansociety, vegeta, VelvetSweaters, voiceofmyancestores, Xmenvsstreetfighter, YTashaLWOMACK

AK38

Dear Friends of Jano,

First and fucking foremost, I am legit upset that I didn’t get superpowers from this spider bite on my leg. The only thing I got is 1. immense fragging pain 2. probably a huge bill for going to the Emergency Room for the first time in years, and 3. I didn’t get to wear my Vegeta costume that I ordered for Halloween last year, but didn’t arrive until after aforementioned Holiday because I was passed out in pain. NO NIGGA WE AIN’T YEETING HERE.

Maybe later in this issue but at this current point, nope this is a yeet free zone.

Anyway.

So for those who have not been paying attention on any of my social media channels and never clicked on my about me page. The picture above is of me, and I just did my first art show. I know right I am a pretty dude, and thank youuuuuu.

The lead up to this was legit unexpected but deeply appreciated it.

Side note, to avoid the excessive use of pronouns I will be referring to some people by their IG names.

So September day whilst I was picking cotton, well making sure the cotton was up to par before it got sent out to random cunts who I’ll probably never meet. One of the field slaves I shuck and jive with, PurpleKloudz, randomly started talking, ya know about anime, art, dreams to be chased and nigga shit. He was telling me how one of his goals was to be in an art show before the year is over, I was like yooooo go ahead and follow your dreams. As the convo went on,I found out it was an anime and art show that he was going to be in.

Hold up, I like anime and I’m an artist. The voices of my ancestors told me I needed to be part of this. Spoiler Alert, When the voices of your ancestors speak you listen, always.

I asked him for more details and how I could be a part of it, he said he would talk to our other slave we shuck and jive with for the scraps master give us, JohnnyLovely.

Look I get it, I am laying it on thick with the slave cotton field references, but I legit work in a plantation that contains majority cotton so I am allowed to say these things. Hella allowed, especially since this is my damn site.

Anyway.

So at some point after a day of picking cotton, me and both of the aforementioned fellow slaves had a nerd gathering in the parking lot. Thats where it went down. YEET YEET.

JohnnyLovely told me about how this is the second anime and art show that his friend was having. I asked could I show any of my pieces, and he was like ummmm idk. Fuck it, I’ll try anyway and I did. He gave me the information of the person who was orchestrating the event. I sent him the links to all of my galleries, ALL of my galleries. Need a reminder, no problem. Starting from oldest to the most recent we have Miasmic Emancipation, Velvet Sweaters,Numinously Noir, Emerald Evisceration and oh yeah my house party invites just for good measure.

And he said I was in. YEET YEET NIGGA. Actually Yeet didn’t really do justice for how excited I was, especially when you hear people saying you shouldn’t draw the things you draw. Well fuck you naysayers, especially those I am genetically linked to.

The next step was to choose which images I wanted to display. Eventually I chose the 3 below.

creep-2

torment1

Private Party1_edited-1

Yep that last one was def chosen. Not gonna lie the process was hard. When it was all said and done,I hit up one of my friends I use to pick cotton with at another field a few years ago. I asked him would he mind printing out my images for the show, and he said sure. It was going good but due to the amount of colors I use in my drawings, I kinda killed his blue printhead. Yea, I wasn’t expecting that. So for images 2 and 3, I had to go to Office Max to get those printed out. Pretty sure they were confused and concerned about what I had them make.

As if I give a fuck, Spoiler Alert I don’t.

I got my frames and bam, I was all set.Since I finally got my images printed and frame I could actually start posting ads for it on social media. The last thing I wanted to do was post I was going to be in an art show and not have my stuff ready. The day before I met with the organizer of the show, and briefly dropped off the above pieces along with some small ones I had made when I did the pop art show in 2017. I got home, did my hair because my hair was an arid dry mess, and passed the fuck out.

The day of the show came, and I wish I requested off. I was excited, legit excited as fuck. Me and my girl left the cotton field, grabbed food from Chick Fil A, and went back to my place. I changed first then she did. Joy is when you get to wear a shirt you ordered a month ago for the first time at a kool event that you are in.While she did I meditated, because sometimes you got to do that before something major in your life is about to happen. On the way there I legit was trying to find a song to amp me, this is the bad thing about primary listening to somber music. I did find some pleasure in Rapsody’s Nina and Cleo and J.Cole’s Middle Child. In hindsight I wish I remembered Awerooh’s- Its My turn now, that was my shit, 3 years ago when I was developing my website.

Eh, maybe next time.

We got to Camp North End, did a brief photoshoot before we headed to the event. Yo, real shit I am legit awkward in front of a camera, I am. Yea I take selfies but full body poses aren’t a thing I’m use to doing, even though I tell others what to do when I am behind the lens. The event didn’t start until 7, but I wanted to be there to see the set up process and place flyers for my site, and a copy of my book series for people to view.

The night flew by after that honestly. Lush Lofi flowed in the background,feeling as if I was in an episode of Samurai Champloo. Her and I walked around for a while at some point we saw our fellow slaves who were also having their art exhibited, the one’s told me about the show. As the night went on, I was both the subject and the usual detached observer while I took photos of the event. Its a weird feeling since I am never am the subject of an event.

I promise sometimes I feel like I am the unborn child of Samantha White and Lionel Higgins from Dear White People.

Our other slave friends showed up, and we were all like AWWW SHIT NIGGA. She helped get people to look at book, Yaaaaaaas honey Yaaaaaaas. In case anyone hasn’t noticed I’m shy as shit, so her amping me up defiantly helped my spirit. My friend who printed one of my images came with his wife and daughter, and at some point the 5 of us walked around. Eventually we doubled back to the event and they head out.

Another slave showed up, who I met in an odd way. Well not really odd considered the digital word we live in. We work at the same place, but our first interaction was when she liked a post I did of me starting a book on AfroFuturism by YTasha L. Womack.

I still need to finish that book.

At the time I didn’t know who she was, until one day at work I was stopped and she was like I think I liked your post. Oh shit, wasn’t ready. The convo couldn’t last long because if masta see’s us lil field niggas not picking his cotton we gets in bigs trouble, and we don’t wants no trouble.

But Jano, how is this relevant to the story?

I’m about to get to that, impatient ass.

She showed up with her daughter, and she was thoroughly impressed with the pieces that me and our fellow field slaves had to put up. From the perspective that we had worked hard to create something, and going to the extra effort of making our work being seen to the public something that some people hesitate to do. The fact that the artist space was primarily created by and for black artist thrilled her more. Thrilled her to the point that she felt inspired to do something similar and create an AfroFuturism con here in Charlotte.

Now you get the relevance.

Oh shit, that would be awesome. I’ve been hoping to do shows especially black themed sci fi art shows, it would be an added bonus if there was one here in Charlotte. Hopefully this will manifest into something flourishes, heavily.

The night trickled on, at some point there was a group photo taken of me and the other artist. Still awkward as hell for me to pose, so fucking awkward. After that me and some of the people I pick cotton with went on to go play Cards Against Humanity. I bounced back to the event to get my prints, at some point the dude who organized all this said there would be another one in March. Nigga I’m so down.

And thats it. I was talking with JohnnyLovely a few times before the day of the show. At some point he said a black art renaissance is heading towards Charlotte, and after this I can see it happening. Another conversation, I made reference to Dear White People, how after the Black Face Party there were a series of events that occurred after and it affected everyone differently. My ancestors say that both of our feelings are accurate. Was this event an adequate save point and it will propel me into another direction that will benefit me greatly or will I stagnate and float on in a void of despair?

Spoiler Alert, either result will be chronicled here as usual.

Hopefully this clearing will lead to an oasis that splinters many paths of abundance. In the meantime to see photos from the even go here.

Pretty sure this was a big save point in my art journey. Speaking of save points I’m gonna resume from the one in Final Fantasy 7 and hopefully beat it before the year is over. Also next issue we will go back to the regular flowing timeline. This was an omg I need to talk about it now so my spirit can go back to chill mode, and I have.

Restarts ChillMode.exe

Midtown Park Funk

02 Monday Sep 2019

Posted by janoryusaru in Uncategorized

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

1080, 13reasons, 13reasonswhy, 4k, 70s, 80s, 90s, 90sHipHop, 90sr&b, abari, abariblockparty, accomplishments, aesthetic, afropunk, Akahana, AliciaKeys, AliciaKeysSoSimple, altblackgirls, alternativeblackgirl, alternativeblackmodels, alternativemodel, Arcade, ArmadaSkateShop, Art, artlife, BBCBloggers, BBlogRT, beerandchicken, blackcreatives, blackhippie, blackmodels, Blackphotographers, blackwomen, bleachedhair, bleachednaturalhair, blessedbe, Boombox, carefreeblackgirl, Cassette, CassettetoMp3converter, Central, Charlotte, clt, cottonfield, curly, curlygirl, curlyhairkillas, decepticon, depomarket, dreamville, dreamvillefestival, dyedhair, dyednaturalhair, easter, easter2019, Ecuadorian, entrepreneur, expression, eyewearfashion, eyewearstyle, fashionphotography, Ff7, FFVII, finalfantasy7, firstshift, flowerchild, followers, freespirit, FriedChickenArtParty, gold, goodvibes, GraveDestiny, green, greenhair, greenstone, HD, healhyhairjourney, hippie, ig, InfinityGauntlet, instastyle, introvert, J.Cole, JanoRyusaru, Jcole, KalyanaPrice, KillerBFried CHicken, laborday, lexicon, mermaidhair, middlechild, midtown, naturalhair, naturalhairgoals, NODA, nomad, OSOskatepark, PBR, punkblack, QFXJ-22UBk, RachelTrue, ravage, RerunXradio, Retro, slaves, socialmedia, Soundwave, spring2017, spring2018, spring2019, stayweird, stone, style, Thanos, TheCraft, thirdshift, Transformers, travel, trophy, vintage, vivachicken, vocabulary, weirdo, womensaccessories, womenswear, wonderlust, YEET

ILYV1QwL-2

Dear Friends of Jano,

Man I actually worked a full summer, that hasn’t happened in years. Def not a fan, even though I did get to do fun things this summer. The price of freedom yields monetary gain for joy. Yay Capitalism…. I suppose.

Anyway.

This another entry in the existential Infinity stone saga that started in the wee early days of 2017. For those keeping up this would be the fourth stone of the arc, 2 more and I’ll have a full set.

Side note, As I type this I am still in search of those two stones. As long as it has taken to get to this point I hope that they are worth it.

MAN, on god nigga, on GOD my nigga this concept was pretty simplistic, it was. But for some reason it took a year and four months to achieve it.

Spoiler Alert.

Who remembers that one part of the mermaid saga when I said I went to go scout Midtown Park for a possible shoot location? Well I am piggy backing off that for this issue. When 2018 started I remembered that location on that aggravating as fuck day. Couple that and the random images I see on the internet from Instagram and Pintrest, an idea gestated in my mind. I decide to do a 90’s era photoshoot.

But Jano that sounds like it would be simple to pull off. Why did it take so long?

Have ya’ll not been paying attention to my life? How often are any of my ideas simple? Exactly. I promise this art journey comes with more side quest than most modern video games. I should have hella trophies unlocked now. Fuck I should have bonus points for cussing anyone out. Wait would I get a trophy for actually loosing my cool? I might go for a trophy next time I get hit with some 1080 HD 4k fuckery.

I was scrolling through my IG timeline and thought to ask this girl I follow and models, who I thought would do it. I had asked her to model for me in 2017, but I didn’t really have an idea in mind unlike this time. I approached her with the idea and the time frame I wanted to do it, Ie when it wasn’t cold as fuck. She was down for it.

YEET.

I wasn’t saying Yeet last year, but I am now, So fuck it. Time travels is a fluid concept.

Eventually I bought an Old school 90’s boombox, ya know the type you would see on TV. The type you can carry on your shoulder and disturb all the peace, but be harmonious to yourself and those who appreciate the genre of music you like. I found some old blank cassette tapes I had in my room from when I use to actually listen to the radio, and record music off.

MAN the nostalgia of simple times, take a nigga back. Not gonna lie tho Spotify is def the best, especially since I can’t stand what is on the radio nowadays.

At this point we are in Mid March. I emailed her asking what songs would she want on the mixtape. I like going for a full effect of what the fuck I am trying to shoot if I can.

Ya’ll bitches be the worse. They do, the absolute fucking worse.

I would email her, and assuming that not everyone checks their mail all the time (even though our initial conversation about what I was trying to achieve with this shoot was via email and she replied, but whatever) I would message her asking if she got my email as a prompt for her to check it. Bitch would leave me left on read, but on god would like all my memes. All of em.

Bitch Whet???

At some point when I attempted to communicate with her, she did reply saying that she hadn’t checked her email. I took a screenshot of the msg and sent it to her via IG DM’s….and still no reply.

FUCK IT.

Just absolute fuck it.

Ya’ll think this is bad, wait til we get the last 2 stones. Oh boy those are true anime arcs, long as fuck. Filled with Daunting moments of existentialism.

Timeline wise we are near the nigger heat summer of 2018. I got laid off from my job, so I was free as fuck. Figured I’d make the best of my time the best I can. It was upsetting because on the photography part of the art journey, you can’t do a photoshoot without a model. And unlike the mermaid saga and the candy queen arc, this wasn’t a difficult concept.

AT ALL.

Summer came and I would fill my days of being laid off of going to restaurants, of stuffing my face, working on acts 3 and 4 of my book, while using their wifi to play hours of music on Spotify. At various points I would have random text conversations with friends.

One friend in particular, I was telling her about the aforementioned events. And she said she would do it. Awe struck I was, especially since she told me can’t be out in the sun for too long. Truthfully I had thought about asking her, but there was reasons I didn’t. Mainly because us hanging out is always difficult, typically the days we have attempted to hang out something always happened. At this point in time, we had only seen each other 2 times….

…and we had known each other for a few years. I know adult friendships are hard but this was final level boss hard.

I knew better, but hoped for the best.

Unfortunately the same patterns repeated themselves. The days when we had made plans to meet up to pick the songs for the mixtape, something drastic came up on her end. And at some point I stopped hearing from her for a while, found out who later on why which has no bearing on the rest of this issue.

Again this project was dead in the water. I kept searching, and eyeballing people of who I would want to do this. Eventually I started working a new job in October and 2018 ended and 2019 arrived.

Now we are getting to the climax of this story.

At some point in the cotton field I became cool with one of the fellow slaves. Due to the weekend shift being dissolved, her and a few others were now part of my shift. As time went on I noticed she had a 90s aesthetic. I figured maybe I should ask and see would she model for me.

So one February day in the cotton field I asked.

She seemed squeamish to the idea, but gave me her email anyway so I could give her all the details of what I am trying to do for the project. She told me she would give it some thought, I was like Koolio beanzo.

However, *deep sigh*

Her started to get complicated for various reasons which I don’t feel like typing. But emotionally she was starting to go through it. The tiny part of me that is humane thought it would be in bad taste to ask her about it.

I promise this could have been so simple, but was like Nah Nigga.

Anyway, One week I saw an art event on Facebook about Art, Beer and Chicken. And this nigga likes chicken and art.

Spoiler Alert.

Friday came, and I made an effort to stay awake post cotton field. If I passed out like I usually do I would have not made there at all. I got there and legit didn’t plan on seeing anyone I know at all. I didn’t. Social skills was not a thing I was planning on using that night.

Ironically enough I did.

At some point I went to the restroom, came back and while I was waiting in line there was a girl ahead of me in line. I recognized the green hair and the pointy cat ear frames, internally I was like I think thats a person I follow online. And it was.

You know how you what if scenarios play in your head? Well sometimes I have ones where I’m out and someone who follows me online sees me and they go OMG you are so kool, nice to meet you, you are hilarious as fuck. Well thats what happened.

We catch eyes and she starts talking to me, and me being the awkward, tired person I am finds myself in a scenario I legit never thought was gonna happen especially since I didn’t think I would run into anyone that night. Oh irony. We talk for a few mins, goes off to grab some food and thats it for our interaction for the night. I see her with 2 other people, but don’t go over to them because I legit didn’t wanna be a odd as fuck spare wheel who is socially awkward. At some point I leave to go home and pass out, but before I do send her a message sorry if I came off awkward as fuck. She said it was kool, she thought she was awkward and I was like nah you were ok.

Awww tender moments.

Ironically enough, I ran into her the next day at Abari’s block party and it was like we were friends from 10 years ago. It was me, her, the two guys I saw her with last night and my homegirl. It was a pretty chill day. At some point I started to think maybe she would model for me.

The following week I asked my aforementioned coworker when did she want to work on her mixtape. Man the apprehension and nervous on her face was all the answer I needed, and after a discourse she told me my least favorite words when it comes to a photoshoot.

I’ll let you know.

Essentially those words are nails in a coffin for me, because no one ever lets me know shit. Spoiler Alert, its several months later and I still have not been let known anything. I decide to message my recent internet friend to real life friend, and she said would totally be down.

YEEEEEET!!!!

HOLY FUCK, THE YEEET I FELT DEEP IN MY HEART. The ball started rolling finally. Something that should have happened last fucking spring finally was happening.

We started an email correspondence, of what songs she would want on the mixtapes, when each of us would be free, and what not. Her playlist was crack on a stick. I somehow downloaded all the songs from Spotify using some program, and the transferred them to a cassette tape.

Kinda.

The transfer didn’t go as smooth as I had planned. First I had to order a new flash drive because my kool Transformer Ravage one fragged out on me. Even after that I didn’t get the order of the songs arranged like I thought. And for some reason the last 30 secs to minute of the song would abruptly cut off, which was really fucking odd considering the songs were downloaded in full.

Odd, but not odd enough for me to sweat it. We chose Easter Sunday to do the shoot. As excited as I was, I was also nervous as fuck. To be honest I was nervous that it would be a repeat event of Incandescent Spirits, where I had acted like I never held a camera before Plus this was the first photoshoot Ive done since August 2018.That was humiliating for me and I didn’t want that to occur again. At any costs. As usual I spent the day mentally preparing how I wanted this to go down. I had recently scouted the area again, since the last time I was there was August 2017.

She and her boyfriend arrived, which was kool because he helped carry some of the things that were brought. Oh I forgot to mention, she had never modeled before which really didn’t matter because she did a great job. She had made a comment how she hated how she looks in photos, and then I showed her and she was like well damn.

Not to be cocky, but thats usually the reaction when I show people photos of them. Nice how I make people believe in themselves….even though I am a legit asshole.

As the shoot went on we laughed each time a song ended abruptly, not gonna lie it was hilarious and annoying when it was a song we all really liked. At some point we called it quits for various reasons. She was exhausted from her job which I totally understood, and there was a still a good amount of the park to shoot. Plus there were other areas we had to skip over because people were shooting there already. And she wanted to do her make up better than she had for today. We ended it for the day, and did the 2nd half a week later.

MAAAAN Listen. She came out her car looking like Rachel True from The Craft and I won’t mad at it. At all. We did the rest of the park with no problems.

Wait, no there was a problem. So at some point this random old white man, who we presumed was homeless and drunk. Decided to piss in the area where we are shooting.

NIGGA!, There is a whole park for you to piss in and you chose the area where we are. Smells like racism and expired Budweiser. Cunt.

And after that I fulfilled my promise of feeding her when it was over. She originally wanted to go this sushi restaurant, but at some point we were talking about how I went to this Ecuadorian restaurant that my friend took me to while I was in Raleigh J.Cole’s Dreamville festival which led us to Viva Chicken. OMG blessed be Viva Chicken and the purple and yellow sauce.

YEET NIGGA YEET.

Also Dreamville Festival is where I heard the word Yeet. It was during J.Cole’s performance, and at some point after he performed Middle Child this white girl yelled it and it has been part of lexicon ever since. Damn White girls.

Anyway to see the images from this shoot that honestly should have taken this damn long go here.

With this the 4th stone was collected. Green did infect beat gold after all.

Don’t ask.

Anyway I legit just spent a good while typing this, and I’m all typed out plus hungry for some chicken.

Until next time.

2 stones left.

UGH.

On another note, my goal is to finish Final Fantasy 7 this month and finish Grave Destiny by Kalayna Price. Since ya know they should have been done along time ago.

New Book Series: Azure Ascendance Issue 2

29 Monday Jul 2019

Posted by janoryusaru in Uncategorized

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

africanfantasy, afroart, afrobooks, Afrofuturism, afronovels, allmylove, altfashipn, amazon, AndersonPaak, AzureAscendance, BBCBloggers, BBlogRT, blackartistspace, blackexpressiveculture, blackgirlsanime, blackgoth, blacknerdproblems, blacknerdsquad, blackqueen, blackscienefictionsociety, blackscifi, blackspeculativefiction, blacksuperheroes, blerdcon, CharlesHamilton, Charlotte, codegeass, cosplay, creamy, createspace, dearwhitepeople, dearwhitepeopleseason3, dopeblackart, dragonballabridged, Durarara, ekindle, Eminem, FairyTail, fantasywritersofcolor, finalfantasy7, google, gravedesitny, GundamWIng, Halsey, Hulu, incubus, JanoRyusaru, kalaynaprice, kotathefriend, lushlofi, magicknightrayerth, melaninqueen, Netflix, nubiamancy, OnePiece, poc, punkblack, quirktastic, Reiki, SabrinaClaudio, Sailormoon, scifiwritersofcolor, sense8, sephiroth, SinitusTempo, supportblackart, teamfourstar, tfs, unapologeticallyblack, urbanfantasy, Vagina, vaporwave, Wale, youngblackartist, YuYuHakusho

Final cover Issue 2

Dear Friends of Jano,

Holy Shit

Spiderman on Ps4 is a great game, I haven’t beaten it at all but I like what I’ve done so far. I def need to finish Final Fantasy 7 before I fully emerge myself into this masterpiece.

Speaking of Masterpieces

I’m finally releasing Azure Ascendance Issue 2.

YEET.

But Jano why the delay?

Yea well a lot of things, but thats not really important, ie I don’t feel like typing all that. I will say that I can finally afford the copyright for this issue. Point of the story is that I am releasing the next chapter of my saga which I conceived in the demon year of 2016.

At any rate lets dive into Issue 2.

Watatsumi and other members of the Posei Kingdom recover in the hideout of their unknown masked assailant. As they wonder how they will save Princess Yosei, threats loom within the enemy camp that threaten her life. Will the Posei Kingdom be able to save her in time? Or will Yosei fall prey to more anguish than she has already experienced?

I’m so excited to put the next issue out, I hoping to go at a faster rate. But fuck adulthood and having a job. I wonder is this how TeamFourStar feels when they produce videos.

Anyway to see a preview page, go here. And to actually purchase the issue venture forth to Amazon here.

And with that being said we now go back to our regular scheduled program. In the meantime I’ll be web slinging my spirit away or maybe I’ll finally finish Final Fantasy 7 so that I can enjoy Spiderman without wondering can I beat Sephiroth.

Sidenote, Fuck the whole PDF process that I have to go through to create this issue. The admin process is literally the worse.

Frag this shit, but at the same time I am glad to have it ooze out like juice out of a vagina.

Moist as fuck.

*Crosses Fingers that this gets me closer to having it animated on a streaming services, so I can stop working cotton fields that don’t feed my soul.

Gummy Rose

01 Saturday Jun 2019

Posted by janoryusaru in Uncategorized

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

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Dear Friends of Jano,

Damn its that time of year again. Time for that nigger heat, the heat that oppressed my ancestors my ancestors in the times of slavery.

FUUUUCK!!!!!

*deep breath

So this issue is a lengthy one. Longer than the mermaid saga. This saga started September 2017 and ended June 2018.

Riiiiight.

So we are gonna skip how I don’t know how I feel about the series finale of Game of Thrones. Thats who rules over Westeros?? Never would have thought, even though apparently there were signs according to all the recent theories Google feels the need to suggest to me.

Anyway, make sure your wifi is on for this. It is a whole anime arc.

The saga of the summer projects ended, and the feeling was comparable to how the calm after big anime boss battles. Need examples that put your favorite heroes through hell, sure. Togoru, Sensui, Freeza, Majin Buu, The Dark Moon Clan, Lady Debonair, Mistress 9, Doflamingo, Apocalypse, Thanos, The Night King,Shredder (Not the 1990’s cartoon one, he was a joke), need I go on.

Niggas were exhausted, more so mentally than physically. I was over the whole model search and legit just wanted to chill, finish act 2 of my book series, play video games and beat my meat in bliss. Ya know simple shit.

That legit didn’t last long.

At some point in September a friend I use to pick cotton with at my least favorite plantation, (Ikea for those who don’t know my life), hit me up. He told me about a girl that he thought would be a good model for me. He sent me her IG profile and I agreed.

Honestly at this point in time I had no idea what I wanted to bring to life, legit didn’t. The only thing saw artistically was inking act 2 of Azure Ascendance, nothing else mattered. Never the less I messaged her and tried to think of a concept and a possible location.

I didn’t have shit. None, No such shit existed.

I would scroll on my IG timelines and would lean toward flowery and Japanese themes. At some point I even went to Plato’s Closet to browse for possible things I may want to use. We would communicate during this process, I know this sounds vague in contrast to my usual vivid details but this part of the saga is a blur to me. Maybe it was because I didn’t have clue where the fuck I was going, or maybe it was because the job I just started after not working for 9 weeks was having me wake up early as fuck to set up for halloween fuckery.

Yay.

But one day I found a path to follow, and man it was a fucking path that will probably take a few hours to type. First google The Black Tape Project, go ahead I’ll wait.

This project has actually been in existence since 2013. When I saw it years ago I thought the concept was pretty kool and wanted to do something similar to it. Legit forgot all about it until one September day when I saw something pop on IG. In that moment abstract ideas I previously had amalgamated into one grand idea.

And when it did she stopped replying to my messages. Of course.

Jano, did you chase her down for this idea?

Nigga fuck no. After the war of summer 2017 my spirit no longer has no urge to chase people down who don’t want to be part of my life or art journey. She got one email to see if she was still down but after that, nah bruh.

So here I was with this idea with no one to shoot it with. Sadly even though I have mostly female friends, I’m pretty sure none of them would be down for me to cover their bodies in ribbons while being naked in front of me. Spoiler Alert, I’m the cutest loser you will ever meet.

So off to craigslist I go.

Again.

UGH,

I knew what I wanted I wanted a brown, dark skin girl with natural hair. Usually I don’t have a preferred genotype for the ideas I’ve done but this time I did. Replies were scarce as fuck. But before we continue can someone tell me why this white woman replied when I clearly stated that I desire the opposite of her. I even had a picture as an example. NIGGGAAAA!!!!

Dear White People, when I say I want a brown skin female you don’t meet the requirements. Your basic Becky aesthetic can be taken elsewhere.

Anyway at some point that fall I considered one of my coworkers for the part since met the criteria. Since I got a possible model for this project I started the how the fuck am I going to pull this off part, because ya know that is important. First, my homegirl who I shot in the park, let me borrow her eldest daughters cotton candy machine. I actually didn’t use since the shoot took longer to do than expected, and I didn’t want stop her from making cotton candy. Second, since my mermaid cosplay friend, knows the way of cosplay culture I asked her what can I use to adhere ribbons to the skin that won’t cause any type of discomfort. She told me of a spray that I found in hobby lobby one day post cotton field. I tried it on myself while shopping, yea that shit stuck.

I had told my coworker that I needed to get her measurements and I needed to test the spray on her. We attempted to make plans for this to happen, did it tho? Nah, not at all. After several attempts I said fuck it, especially since she told me she had gotten a second job, and ironically the days we planned on something came up.

Spoiler Alert, I’m so over that happening in all avenues of my life.

At this point it is December 2017, and the idea of shooting someone outside who was only ribbon cladded was as dead as the flowers I hoped to capture as a backdrop in this saga. Plus not gonna lie I’m not a cold weather person, not all….unless I’m getting paid. So figured I’d aim to do the shoot in the spring.

The way my life goes it would probably be spring when I found someone.

The search continued. I thought I found a potential one but of course she fizzled out of existence too, honestly there isn’t a point in bringing her up. Another friend who I met during the the mermaid saga, was interested but decided against it for reasons I’m not mad at.

If you give me a legit reason why you don’t want to do a shoot, opposed to just vanishing out of my life after saying you were down I won’t cast stones. Its only when you ghost me do I throw stones, salt, shade and sarcasm. All the painful S’s. Especially if you don’t reply to my message but like my fucking post on social media.

Fast forward to March 2018. One of my homegirls who I shucked and jived with at the plantation wanted to get dinner, we met at Zoe’s Kitchen and talked about how our lives were going. I told her about the shoot I was trying to do, and asked did she have any friends that I may want to shoot for it. She pulled out her phone and showed me her coworker…OMG.

Nigga, I was floored. She was gorgeous, I told her I want her for my bday (no literally my bday was coming up soon) she would be a great gift so I could end this search. She told me she would ask her and man this mystic hybrid was hopeful as fuck. The next time I saw her was at my bday party the following week, and her friend was down.

YAAAAAAAAAAAS.

Blessed Be!! Hail to the guardians of the watch tower.

I got her contact info, and we set up a meeting sometime during the following week.

Real Shit she was kool as fuck. I told her the whole project and was excited. She told me she never modeled before aside from this one thing at college where she was essentially the token black person on the college brochure. I took her measurements, and told her as it warmed up we could start thinking about a date. In the meantime I asked what her favorite type of candy was and liquor choices. She told me gummy bears and was down for any type of spirit consumption. As spring approached I bought a candy dish and a fan off Amazon. In May we met at Hobby Lobby one day post cotton field to see if the ribbons I wanted to use would be a good contrast on her. They won’t. The original intent was pastel colors but they appeared more sheer than anything. I chose 2 variations of the pink and purple I desired.

Side note, I like how after I actual found someone who I wanted and they solidified that they were down things flowed effortlessly.

When we got in the parking lot we talked about a date. She had told me that every Saturday in June she would be off in addition to the Tuesdays she is normally allotted off. We picked the Tuesday the 3rd week of June, and that Saturday as the back up date. In the meantime, my jobs project had ended and I began my 4 months of unemployment.

Not gonna lie,I legit kinda miss being unemployed. All I did was draw, chase my art dreams, eat and sleep in late. Sucks I couldn’t afford to turn on my a/c but I survived….somehow.

Anyway, at some point I fashioned a floral crown from supplies from Party City and Dollar Tree. Yay for the crown making experience points I gained during the mermaid epic. But the cape was a whole different thing. Spoiler alert, I don’t know how to sew, at all. Yay for my homegirls who told me about Hem tape and my cosplay friend who told me about chiffon because my cape may have not existed at all. Rigging the ornament of the cape was the hardest part. As the date came closer she bought a pair of shoes that were way better than anything I could have imagined.

The week came of the shoot FINALLY. OMFG, this took forever. If you think reading this was arduous try living it. That Monday I had called Mcgill Rose Garden to see that there were no events occurring the following day. This garden is legit kool as shit, however it is only open for a few hours a day and it is a popular place people like to have events. The last thing I need is for the background to be loaded with gawking people. That is way more editing than I prefer to do.

They told me no, so the rest of the day I spent buying gummy bears, making a new version of Jano Juice, buying a glass royalty would use and image training on how I wanted the shoot to go and hoped the awkward loss of words that occurred a few weeks prior wouldn’t repeat itself. At some point that night she called me to tell me that we couldn’t do the shoot the next day for a very good reason, her period came.

But Jano why does that matter?

Spoiler Alert, she is going to only be wearing ribbons. Only Ribbons. Pretty sure a females menstrual cycle involves light and heavy blood flow. And from what I heard the first few days are the heaviest, and the last thing that is desired is blood oozing from her while shooting. That is a whole lot of discomfort for her that can be avoided if we rescheduled. So we did for that Saturday. What is a few days compared to several months?

The day before I walked the venue again since I haven’t been there in months, and did the whole visualization thing. My only other hope was that the cops wouldn’t be called on us, that was def a thing last summer. Black people were getting the policed called on them for simple things like living, pretty sure someone would do it if they saw a black girl wearing only ribbons being shot by black photographer with a Black Dynamite Afro for following his dreams if they had the chance. On god my anxiety was high as fuck the night before.

Anyway, the morning came and I did not hear anything from her around the time we were supposed to meet up. My mind started to swell with fear and a million thoughts raced through my head. Was all this for nothing? Would she vanish on me like other models have the past few months? Fuck am I just trash to be thrown away so easily after all?

And those were only the nice thoughts.

I was having another existential crisis similar to what I had the past few months while trying to do other photoshoots, that to this day I still haven’t done 2 of the desired ones. Nigga its June 2019 still have yet to be done, the two aforementioned shoots were conceived October 2017 and January 2018. NIGGA!! A myriad of thoughts clenched my throat leaving me grasping for air, hoping to not drown in an ocean of depression again.

Yea I’m real fucked up and have a trash complex. Yay for conditioning.

Hold on, Let me breath.

FUCK.

I texted her hoping she had just overslept for good reason, and that was the case. The deepest sigh of relief came from me. But we only a had a few hours that the garden would be open. The goal was to be there by the time it opened, mainly to avoid human background traffic. Plus it would be less hot as fuck earlier in the morning, it would still be hot as fuck but not less as fuck. The place opened at 10, and that is when she got to my house around that time. She got to my place, stripped and I applied the ribbons as hastily as I could. There wasn’t any major issues, other than the adhesive getting stuck to me sometimes. I stuck to my design as much as I could, the application wasn’t as neat as desired but I knew I could fix it in photoshop. We got to the venue around 12ish, the place closes at 3.

Luckily barely anyone was there, the few that were there observed proper etiquette of staying the fuck out of our way. I poured her Jano Juice Volume 3 for effect, nice to know I can make good mixed drinks. If this art journey fails maybe I’ll be a bartender. I told her to channel the royal, bad and boujee side she keeps locked away. And she did successfully and elegantly. For someone who never modeled before she did a legit good job. It was worth the wait, of course I would prefer if my ideas didn’t take months to fucking flourish but whatever.

Anyway to see the culmination of my 10 month journey, go here.

*deep breath

That is the end of this epic, I would say saga but I feel epic is more appropriate given the length of time it took to do this. It damn near equated to a whole school year. Since this ribbon concept worked, hopefully I can do it again in another shoot. But will I? No seriously, I have no idea. I def want to but these model searches are so fucking taxing. If you are interested email me, with photos of yourself and please be in Charlotte, N.C.

Moral of the story; keep in touch with your friends from the cotton field they may help you follow your dreams.

Or something, infer what you want from this. Or not. I don’t care.

Thats it for now, I’m going to do something that doesn’t involve typing a narrative for 4 hours, like rewatch Durarara for the fourth time and getting for ConCarolinas.

Yea, I told you this was an epic.

Abandoned Ravens Nest

01 Friday Feb 2019

Posted by janoryusaru in Uncategorized

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Dear Friends of Jano,

Damn its February already, fuck thats wild. But this polar vortex is even wilder, FUCK its so fucking cold when I leave my house to go pick cotton before the freaking sun is up. Its 2019 and I’ve never heard of a polar vortex ever in my life prior to this week. Is this the end of everything??? If it is I hope I get my X-Men Vs Street Fighter game first, it still hasn’t arrived since last issue. GRRRSSSH.

Anyway.

I type this as I breath in Lavender and Peppermint mist from my diffuser, hopefully it will calm me down as I type this.

But Jano Why?

Because 2018 was a fucking existential photographic nightmare. Thats right, as of this issue we are now in 2018 and will be for only 5 issues after this issue. I had so many photographic aspirations and goals last years that went unfulfilled. And here I was thinking that it would be simpler than the concepts I tried to pursue in 2017. Definitely found out there are deeper levels to feeling like trash. But we will get to that later.

As for right now we are gonna flashback to January 2018. My actress homegirl friend England Simpson, wanted to do another birthday photoshoot with her sister like we did in 2017. Her and her sister share the same birthday as Edgar Allen Poe, yes the Edgar Allen Poe. I don’t know why I felt the need to say the Edgar Allen Poe like there is more than one. Fuck its 2019 and I’m going for dramatic effect for no reason. Anyway after our initial convo I started thinking of places where we could shoot at. The first place I thought of was McGill Rose Garden, figured it would be a nice ambiance.

Well it would have been. The original day we were going to do it England was on her deathbed (not really) and since I don’t like the idea of shooting someone when they are not feeling good we postponed it. The new shoot day became that Monday on Martin Luther King Jr Day, but we found out that the rose garden was closed on Mondays.

FUUUUUCK.

Spoiler Alert, I wasn’t that upset.

I scrolled my brain for possible new places and I remembered Stone Jackson Military School. My spirit was hit with so much joy.

But Jano why?

Stone Jackson Military School is an abandoned school with a mass amount of empty buildings. And I legit have been wanting to do an abandoned shoot for the longest period in my life. Well more so since I got serious about my photography journey in 2016. I had scouted it back in the summer of 2017, I had only drove by it though. But the campus is huge, impressive as fuck, and filled with so much potential.

That Monday came, the girls met at my house on the frigid fucking morning and we headed toward the campus. In retrospect there may have been a polar vortex that day too, cuz NIGGA it was cold. Oppressively and disrespectfully cold. England had told me on the drive up there that she was excited because she had viewed it online and saw some of the photos others had shot there. We were all filled with high hopes and magical negro joy.

Right about that.

We got there and all the buildings were fenced up, not regular fences but Jurassic Park style fences. Nigga is there a T-Rex here?

Oh nigga I was upset, when I drove by this place a few months prior these fences weren’t in existence. Well they were in existence but not there. Since the vibe from this place was forbidden as fuck, I parked at a store strip mall down the street from the school and we walked to the school.

Did I say it was cold as fuck? No well it was cold as fuck.

It only took a few minutes to get to campus from where I parked. We had to make sure not to step and slip on freshly frozen patches, the last thing was 3 negroes seen busting their asses on forbidden property. We looked around trying to see if there was any place we could sneak in a building.

*sigh*

Everything was boarded up and if it wasn’t boarded it was enclosed by fences that might as well be electric. At some point an old black man drove by and gave us a warning about us being on the property. At first we thought he was gonna be an informant and the cops would pull up and arrest us shortly after. But in retrospect he probably was just looking out for us so we wouldn’t be a new statistic of cop racism.

Despite his warning we stayed on campus a little while longer trying to make the best out of a blarghed scenario. The whole gated ambiance legit killed my mood, worse than an anime death scene I’ve seen. Shit was worse than seeing Neji die. At some point we saw a gated building that had a hole in it, so England and I decided that we were gonna sneak in to get some shots while her sister decided to watch out. We literally just got in the gate and she told us that she heard a car, we bolted out of the enclosure ASAP. England escaped with no problems, me not so much. My coat got snagged as did my jeans, HARD. Cotton oozed from my goat and my thigh to my shin was exposed.

NIGGA!!!

That frigid weather is way worse when your body is exposed. I felt the wind fill my pants and tickle my balls. My whole ball sack and butt hole was frozen.

Spoiler Alert it is not a pleasant feeling, no such feelings existed for me that day. GOD DAMN IT my balls were cold.

We stayed a little bit longer to get some more shots of what we could so this trip wouldn’t be a total waste, but at some point our collective negro spider senses said we should leave to avoid police confrontation. The last thing I wanted was to have icicles growing out my asshole while dealing with a problematic racist cop while pursing my dreams.

We left, arrived back at my house, and as they chose their photos I changed pants and reclaimed the heat that I had been deprived of for the past 2 hours. The shoot was ok, minus that and everything being fucking gated as fuck. Maybe one day I’ll get to shoot an abandoned building without fear of prosecution. Martin Luther King Jr died for the right to purse my art dreams.

Anyway to view some of the photos from the day my nuts became surrounded by ice click here.

Anyway as Bugs Bunny says Thats All Folks, for this issue at least. Hopefully by the next issue I will have gotten my damn X-Men Vs Street Fighter game, beaten Final Fantasy 7, went to Anderson Paaks Concert, and somehow managed to finish coloring as issue of my comic series. Yo real shit I miss being unemployed like I was in 2016 – early 2017, I could stay up all night and work on my art all night. I just wanna color damn it.

Hail to the Guardian of the Watch Tower. Sun, Moon, Star, North, South, East and West. Help me find time and give me the strength to color the rest of my comic series Azure Ascendance. Help me get it to where it is on Netflix and never have work these jobs I care nothing for ever again. And that I do the photoshoots that I didn’t get to last year.

Blessed Be.

Family Friday Fun Festivities

07 Monday Jan 2019

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Dear Friends of Jano,

Its 2019 and it is a legit warm day opposed day compared to how cold it felt during the fall. MAN I hope it stays like this for like the rest of winter. My bank account would so appreciate it. Legit don’t want to pay more of a gas bill than necessary. No seriously. Keeping warm is fun until you have to pay for it.SMH.

Anyway right now I am legit typing this after deep throating a Burrito at Qdoba and fighting my urge to fully pass the fuck out like I usually do post cotton field. Spoiler Alert, I legit picked cotton today. No seriously. I felt the pain of my ancestors today in a diluted form, Moments like this why I totally sided with Killmonger. Nigga where the fuck is Wakanda??

This issue will actually be a stark contrast to the last four in terms of the amount of salt, shade and sarcasm. As in little to none.

But Jano why? I like the asshole part of you.

Awwww thanks, I actually feel warm because of that. Still tired as shit, but just a lil bit warm. Is this what humanity feels like?

But this issue is a family issue, and the events of this photoshoot was no where near as difficult as the last four. Side note this is the last photoshoot I did of 2017. By choice? No, but we will talk about that later on.

MAAAAN 2017-2018 was an existential nightmare. As Avril Lavigne’s complicated plays in my head now.

Hell this issue probably won’t be that long.

So my really close awesome homegirl friend, mother of the child I shot in Nature Badge, told me that she wanted to get photos of all her children. And since her and I have been besties since the era of Tom and Myspace I said that’s kool. The only actual issue there was with his entire shoot was to pick a time that we were both available.

In case you forgot I wasn’t working for 9 weeks over the summer of 2017, and when I did start working again it was back in the cursed land of retail. Fun. She told me about this Freedom Park Festival thing, which I literally have never heard of before a day in my life. Interestingly enough my schedule for that week allowed me to be free when she wanted. Look at retail hours not fucking up my life. Kinda.I was working 5am shifts, which are kool to a point., but nigga when you get off your body is ready to crash like *insert crashing body reference here.

Around the time it was time for me to get off I saw the store getting filled with people and it looked like my coworkers needed help…and I made no effort to help at all. Nope, no such help existed. I went to Food Lion to get cookies for the kids for a bribe. Yep, I’m not ashamed of it. I’m not good with children at all, so if snacks as a reward are gonna help you said children right so I can get photos of said children, then damn it I’m gonna buy snacks, with the parents permission. Consent is key.,

We all arrive at the park, and I’m legit trying to stay awake and keep up with the pace of life. I talked mostly to my home girls eldest daughter who I shot before, still not legit use to children liking me. Unlike R.Kelly I don’t spend time around underaged people. The whole event was fun though, the kids got their face painted, had funnel cakes, play on the playground, and did other kid things. At some point I got pointed out that a member of the Carolina Panthers was there. Don’t ask me who I legit couldn’t tell ya.

I told ya’ll this is a pretty peaceful issue. Did I give the Spoiler alert? if not

Spoiler Alert, this is a pretty peaceful issue.

To see the chillest and most relaxed photoshoot I did of 2017 click here.. Most of these are candids, but I do candids oh so well.

Anyway like I said this is the last shoot I did of 2017. Next issue will be the start of the existential crisis that was 2018.

Spoiler Alert, unlike 2017 all of the photoshoots I did in 2018 will be premiered on may website this year.

SMH.

Anyway, I am about to do what I did after the events of this shoot….go home and pass the fuck out. Well probably after I watch Naruto and One Piece. This year I’m on the final episodes of Naruto, and the DressRosa Arc of One Piece. At some point before next issue I need to beat Final Fantasy 7. Especially since I just ordered X-Men vs Street Fighter. I can finally play it in the manner it was intended 20 years ago. 14 year old Jano would be happy as fuck.

A hunt for a mermaid, no a literal FUCKING HUNT.

11 Tuesday Dec 2018

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unspecified-66

Dear Friends of Jano,

Here we are the last issue of the year, well last planned issue of the year. Unless something interesting happens….yea this is the last issue of the year. Usually I would start off with some random blurbs about the current circumstances of my life, but this issue is lengthy as fuck.

Jano how long?

Think RPG playtime, final anime boss battle long.

DAMN!

Yea, trust me living it felt a lot longer. OMG it felt like waiting for Planet Namek to explode.

In April of 2017 I thought it be kool to do a shoot about a mermaid. I don’t know if it was because of the internet or the voice of my ancestors, but that idea was planted in my head and damn it stuck. Oh how it stuck. It stuck like a super chain of STDs a serial rapist got for violating the personal space of others who had their own STDS..

As usual I went to Craigslist to sweep through the various communities in hopes to find one that can possibly bring my idea to life. But this time I had another problem to figure out. So in case you haven’t been paying attention I live in Charlotte, North Carolina. And for those who weren’t paying attention in elementary school social studies, it lies within the Piedmont region. Which, spoiler alert, means that there isn’t any coastlines or beaches near me. At best there are lakes and rivers, but that is about it.

So not only did I have to find a model, I had to figure where the fuck I was going to do this shoot at. I made an ad for help on that and color me shocked that it didn’t take that long. This dude replied and said that he would be willing to help me out and let me shoot it at as his fathers house. His father resides in South Carolina for some reason and he was house sitting for him. He sent me a picture of the area and I went YES LAAAAAWD * Anderson Paak voice. He wanted to meet first, which makes sense. I let him know at some point that I was black male, cuz we all know sometimes being black comes at ya fast even when you are doing ordinary things such as living.

Real Shit, I was nervous as fuck about this.

But Jano, haven’t you met people off the internet before?

Duh, but never has it been an elder white guy who was going to use his parents house to let me do a photo shoot to fulfill my art dreams. Even typing that now it sounds odd. Fuck, shits crazy.

Despite that we set a date to meet one May morning. The things we do for our dreams.I drove over to his house, with a box cutter in my bag and my home girl informed of my location just in case shit got weird, well weirder. Dude was odd, kool, but odd. The scariest moment of the whole conversation was when he told me how he got rid of stray cats that roamed into his yard. My niggas eyes were so lifeless when he talked of their disposal.

At some point we went to his dad’s house and OMG, the picture he had sent me didn’t do it justice. I fell more in love with the photographic potential more so. OMG. However, there was only problem with this whole scenario. Due to the nature of this dudes job of being an organ delivery driver, if he got called to do a delivery that shoot would have have to be postponed for another time since he wanted to be there on the property. That nagging factor bothered me. I told him I would be back in contact with him once I solidified a model and a time, which was true at the time. But you know life it is a fickle cunt. The girls who had shown interest prior to the meeting went full ghost when I reached back out to them. BLARGH.

But.

Before we go back to the model hunt, lets get these other details out the way. First off the location, since back up plans are a necessary thing. The place creepy cat killer had showed me was near Latta Plantation Park. Yes, the place I mentioned several issues ago. On a whim I decided to walk the path less traveled, Literally. When I was there before I had never walked any of the trails, so I figured might as well.

Yay for whims.

The environment was so Shway for the narrative I wanted to present. At the end of the trial there was a peninsula that had a nice view of the lake and barely any traces of humanity. Side note when I was surveying the area, there were people Jet skiing, I was so hoping one of them would drown and die. Anyway. Safe to say this was my location, I legit never contacted that creepy cat guy again. He has a name, but honestly at this point it doesn’t matter.

As the search for a non fickle model continued, I had to craft some props for this shoot. Timeline wise, we are in mid June at this point. I legit have never crafted shit in my life, aside from art projects in school I never had to. But you are surprised what you learn to do when there is an aesthetic you have in mind. Shout out to Youtube and Pintrest teaching how to use my hands in more magical ways. The goal one Friday June night was to make a mermaid bra and crown. Hobby Lobby and Walmart is where I got most of my supplies, in particular seashells, pipe cleaner, ribbon, and hot glue gun, There was a tiara I needed, which I promise you I have seen a million times before this day BUT the day I actually was going to buy it. Nope couldn’t be found at all. I legit bounced from several different stores to find a fucking tiara. Blessed be Super Target for having it and a bag of jewels. As for the tail, one of my home girls was a mermaid for the last halloween. She said I could borrow her dress, she didn’t have the exact dress but had one similar that I can make it look mermaid tail esque.

Now for the models. Side note, shout out to it being a snow day because real shit this is a lot to navigate through my memories. If I had picked cotton today this wouldn’t be getting done.

Anyway, the model search. Because that is the one thing that is missing from this whole fucking saga.

Spoiler alert; the upcoming contains fuckery, confusion, betrayal and more fuckery than should be encountered.

*Deep Breath*

At this point we are still in June, the girls who had expressed interest were no longer replying and others were replying who honestly I didn’t like their face or vibe. I told ya’ll I’m picky, no apologies.

I was following one girl on IG, and decided to DM her to see if she was down for the concept. And she was….kinda.

When I reached out again to see if she was available for the next week, she had informed me that she got signed to a modeling agency. Congrats I told her and the convo ended there oddly. I hit her back a week later to see if she was free the following w.end, she asked if her manager had informed me of her rates.

Rates?

Bitch a few weeks ago you were so down for the TFP. Now you done got brand new and talking about some rates? The fuck you mean rates? Look I respect the craft, but I can’t afford the craft. Especially when I am working erratic seasonal project jobs with end dates after not working for a year and 4 months. Maybe when I am full level up adult with a stable job, but right now I am relying on the kindness of strangers who with mutual interest to help me make my art dreams come true. I told her I’ll have to pass because of the whole job situation. A legit reason because I was laid off again mid July and didn’t work again until September.

FUCK.

This shit is aggravating. Even recounting this arc is aggravating. I wanna drink some Jano Juice to soothe my spirit. Maybe this weekend.

Anyway

So there was another girl who replied to one of my witch photoshoot ads. I never replied to her about that because obviously I found someone who matched what I wanted more so. But this girl had a mermaid tattoo, so I thought to ask her. MAAAAAAN I shouldn’t have. She had asked how much was she going to paid.

Bitch hold up. In the ads I am very upfront about the only compensation will be copies of the final images. I was so clear about that, so fucking clear. There legit is no room for interpretation. At all. Aside from that maybe you should not reply with ads with dirty bathroom selfies. you pasty posh cunt face.

Ok I’m done for now.

At this point it is July and I’m aggravated, so fucking aggravated. I placed a final ad on Craigslist and I won’t lie I aired out all my grievances. In particulate don’t waste my time with this, if you aren’t serious about this please don’t waste my time and please read all of the ad before asking me stupid fucking questions.

Of course someone replied….

Spoiler Alert; this is the climax of the story. Oh so much climax. That sentence probably does not make sense but fuck it.

Her name was Marlene, and she wanted to know more about the project. I told her and at some point she shared how she always felt she has been a mermaid all of her life. Who the fuck am I to argue that you felt like a mythical creature? If thats what you feel when you wake up, feel it. In my mind it will translate great in the images. Fuck Big Dick Energy, You got that mermaid energy. She inquired about a tail and since it actually seemed like I finally had a model for this fucking project, I figured I actually extend the effort to make it. I hit up my home girl who helped me with Demented Rose and Scarlet Tracks since she is big into cosplay and crafting. I was hoping she had a quick way to make a tail since every way I saw was complicated as fuck. Her answer was to buy one, and I was like nah. I’m legit not spending over 100 on fucking mermaid tail, in case you guys haven’t been paying attention I’ve been dealing with some fickle ass cunts. And I didn’t wanna be stuck with a tail for a model who went ghost on me.

So my homegirl decided to help me out, she said would be willing to help me out. She had recently brought one and would be willing to let this girl use her tail if they were the same size to help me achieve my dreams.

Ya’ll I felt like a person in that one moment. Kinda how in How The Grinch Stole Christmas when his heart grew 3 sizes bigger for some sentimental reason which I can’t exactly remember. She was Cindy Lou Hoo and I was the Grinch who was essentially at the spiritual place of fuck this.

Spoiler Alert,I have a legit complex in case you couldn’t tell.

Emotional Moment Over.

Ironically enough new girl and my friend both wear the same size. The next thing we had to do was see if the bra and crown I made fit. The crown did, but the bra that was something else. SO I let her borrow some of my supplies that I brought to make a bra, we had set a date, I told my friend and we were all in agreement.

…..

Well…

August came as well the week of the shoot, and I messaged new girl asking are we still down for the weekend and was the bra done. She told me that she had been busy with work and school.

Ok here is the thing, I checked UNCC’s school calendar. School hadn’t started yet, it wasn’t going to start until a week later. But I assumed she meant getting ready for school. Man when your ancestors tell you fuckery is afoot, you listen to your ancestors. Thursday came and I asked was she still down for the shoot, and she replied saying that wouldn’t be.

UGH.

So I had to tell my homegirl lives in Raleigh, who took off from work not to come down. She wasn’t happy about it. I can’t blame her, I would be pissed off too. So the next day since my shoot wasn’t happening, I decided to go scout Midtown Park for a future photoshoot I wanna do at some point. I get home and check my snapchat…..this bitch is driving to Baltimore, Maryland.

WHORE!!! I COULD KILL YOU!!!!!! NOT ONLY DID YOU WASTE MY TIME!!!! YOU WASTED MY FRIENDS TIME WHO WAS WILLING TO ME OUT!!!!. I SHOULD CUT YOUR BOULDER SIZE BREAST OFF AND THROW THEM AT YOUR FUCKING HEAD YOU FILTHY SNOBBISH CUNT!!!!!!!

*deep breath.

I was so god damn mad.I wanted no still want to set her apartment on fire and hope someone beats her head with a brick as she tries to escape.

I apologize to my friend, for the fact that her time was wasted and this snobbish bitch wasn’t as professional as she seemed. I asked her would she be my mermaid to help me out, she texted me after I got the email saying she would do anything to help me out. Legit felt joy and felt like I mattered to someone. I have never heard those words uttered to me before, at all. And still haven’t since then.

There goes that trash complex again.

Me and her picked a date, and at some point she came down. The first time I had seen her in a year, awwww tender moments. Problem was she forgot the bra, so we had to wait another week to do the shoot. She apologized but it was kool, at this point one more week wasn’t going to hurt all things considered. She came back down a week later, she wanted to stop by Hobby Lobby and got some supplies.

This was it and it was finally happening. 4 months later it was finally happening. Ya’ll have no idea how arduous the past 4 months had been.You legit don’t. At this point we are the on the first weekend of September. I just got a new job, the sun is starting to set earlier and the wind has gotten a chill in it that hasn’t been felt in months. Luckily the area I want to shoot my friend is pretty vacant, as in there is no one there to obstruct the background. People are legit the worse.

The narrative I had in mind was ironically similar to The Little Mermaid, Mermaid washes on shore and explores the new world.I say ironic because I never saw The Little Mermaid. Well I saw it in Spanish in 11th grade, so that doesn’t really count. She switched between her tail and the dress of my friend. At some point that fall chill became a thing and she got cold, so I tried to wrap it up as soon as I can. Defiantly didn’t want her to catch a cold because of me, my conscious can’t deal with that. When it was all said and done we went to get something to eat and watched youtube videos, as my body remembered I need to stretch before I do these shoots that involve me acting like Nightcrawler. Acrobatic as fuck even though I ain’t been to the gym in years.

But wait, before we show the pictures from this saga. We need to finish the arc first.

But Jano, what do you mean….oh that Siren faced no ass bastard.

Well, at some point she called me a week after we were supposed to shoot. But yo wtf do we have to talk about? Honestly I am not a confrontational person, I’m pretty chill until you piss me off. Waisting me and my friends time is def a way to piss me off. *Yusuke Urameshi voice. The day after me and my homegirl did our photoshoot, I checked my snapchat and Siren face had posted a video of the shells and a net saying something about mermaid things or something to that effect. A few days later there was a photo she posted about with her mermaid hashtags. Oh nah, I need my shit back. See I only let her borrow those materials to help me out, not to shoot with some other nigga.

I emailed her and we agreed on a time that week…man that meeting was so awkward. Every cell in my usually chill being wanted to take the net off the wall and Lynch her like they lynched black people in the south, but I kept it together. My father has this saying don’t piss on me and tell me it is rain. This bitch legit treated me like R.Kelly did those teenagers in the early 2000s, metaphorically. I’ll be damn if I let a cunt whore piss on em. The lies she told of how she really wanted to do the shoot but was really busy. Bitch you did the shoot, you didn’t do it with me but you did it. Pretty sure you never even thought of doing a mermaid shoot until you saw that Ad on Craigslist.

Moral of Story, Fuck it I don’t know. Infer one for yourself. But if you get a chance to choke a bitch with a net they made that is hanging on the wall, take that opportunity. Life will figure out the rest later.

I told ya’ll this was a long story, if you actually read the whole thing. Congrats your reward is here.

Hell typing this was exhausting as fuck. Shout out to this snow day again because otherwise I would have been too exhausted to recall this fuckery. I felt like I just wrote a paper when I was at UNCG.

In other news that is fuckery free, I finally finished storyboarding my comic Azure Ascendance. Now the only thing left to do is color the remaining issues. YAAAAASSSS got the impending coloring coma.At least I got that done, sadly I didn’t get all the photoshoots done this year that I wanted. Hopefully the last 3 won’t be no where near this difficult as this was, hopefully. MAN, even typing this arc was a headache.

Anyway. thats it folks. The next issue won’t be no where near this heavy and filled with salt. Its actually the last photoshoot I did of 2017, which will be the first issue…of next…..year…..FUCK IT.

See ya in 2019.

The Art of Trombone

18 Wednesday Jul 2018

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unspecified-3 Dear Friends of Jano,

NIGGA ITS HOT!!! Like Disrespectful as fuck hot. Oppressively hot. Do I even need this skin hot. Put Deodorant on your genitals hot. Field Nigga slave empathy hot.I’ll def take this over winters frigid ways but holy fuck, is it this heat wave that necessary for the culture?

This issue is coming later than usual this month because honestly I didn’t feel like typing. I didn’t. Not to say that I haven’t typed anything this month, but it wasn’t anything lengthy. Ya know nice little blurbs, nothing more.

Anyway here we are finally.

So back in the Days of the Dead issue, I said that the initial shoot I was going to talk about had to be delayed because my coon college friend didn’t have one of his websites ready. Well it’s ready now and I can commence talking shit about him, and the photoshoot of that April Saturday.

But Jano didn’t you say you are friends?

Spoiler Alert, you are right. But every since I’ve met this nigga back in my 2nd semester during Spring Semester 2003 at UNCG, he has talked more shit than I thought humanly possible. If I had a Myspace style friend ranking of people who talked shit, he would be in the top 10. So I’m allowed to talk about this big nostril, cone headed, Vegeta Bashing, shit talking, blasting rappers that irk your soul (Damn Gucci Mane), detritus, diseased country bama, scum of the earth. This nigga would have you feeling like you may wanna follow in Hannah Bakers footsteps.

But despite that, he is a very gifted negro when it comes to the trombone.

Damn Jano, are you satiated yet?

Right now I am.

At any rate, My homeboy Brain called me one day and asked me could I do a photoshoot for him for his new music website. Look at Niggas following their true passions in life, even though they are exuding scum essence, YASSSS.

Sorry, not sorry.

I gave him a price, he agreed and we picked a Saturday that worked with our schedules. Legit 2nd photoshoot I got paid for last year, sadly it was also the last but whatever I could finally put some toward my tattoo fund.

So fucking close now. So…fucking….close….

I drove to Greensboro hoping that it doesn’t pour down rain anytime soon. It was cloudy as fuck as I was driving up there. Legit it was more shady than anything that has ever came out of his mouth in all the years I’ve known him.

Damn there I go again. I promise me and this nigga are actually Kool. On God.

I get to his place and we head to a park that I legit never went to or heard of any of the time I lived in Greensboro from 2002 to 2010. We arrive and we see all these white kids dressed up.

What white nonsense is this?

Then it hit us its Prom Season, OOOOOOOh that shit. But its legit pretty crowded, so we walk to where little white children are sparse to none. Luckily it was a big park. He tells me he has never modeled before, I tell him to play his trombone to relax and honestly to pretend I’m not there. It honestly went well, considering I wasn’t familiar with this park at all and he never modeled a day in his scummy puss filled soul life.

Everything was good until it started pouring down raining, and that far distance we walked to get away from a bunch of acne faced teenagers we had to run to get back to his car. You ever see 2 people run in a torrential downpour, hoping not to ruin their equipment, and not slip and bust their ass?

It is probably funny as shit watching, but being in said downpour nope not so much. No such fun exist.

Anyway, the rest of the day involved us going to meet up with some of our friends at some place. I legit promise every white boy at the bar my friends and I ended up at looked like they idolized Brock Turner and had rape intentions. I don’t apologize for that shit, I don’t. If you are mad you probably ain’t shit and think that violating ass cunt was justified, kill yourself creepy bastards.

To see some of the images that occurred before we got rained out, go here. And if you need a trombone or piano player, or a music lesson check out his website. And if you need to purchase an instrument check out his new store site as well.

See this nigga has some value in life after all.

Moral of the Story. Be careful of how much shit you talk to your friends because one day you could be exposed for filth on said friends website.

There is probably another lesson about following your dreams and passions, but eh not today.

Anyway I’m all typed out for the month. I’m gonna go play Final Fantasy 7 until next time.Damn Cloud, your backstory is tragic as fuck.

Witch Hunt

03 Thursday May 2018

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c33a_preview

Dear Friends of Jano,

Ok before we talk about anything relating to my photographic journey I holy need to say Holy Fuck in regards to Avengers Infinity War. After somehow dodging most of the spoilers on social media I saw it last night and damn Thanos. That big purple nigga has me reevaluating my favorite villains in life. Every time he came on screen I was legit shook, like damn it is the Captain of the Death Rape Squad. Thanos is the type of the nigga who doesn’t pull out after he rapes you because he is going to abort the life he blasted inside you and your life when its all done in the name of balance. DAMN. I wish Thanos would blast Kanye West into atomic particles, since this nigga want to slave that slavery was a choice. This Nugga.

Anyway.

So spoiler alert I follow a lot of random things on instagram. photographers, art, models, suicide girls, alternate models, anime and other things that I can’ think of right now. Since I’m bombarded by an array of images of course I am going to be inspired and want to incorporate new things into my art. In particular I wanted to start alternate photography and since I know no one who does it I went to Craigslist.

Spoiler Alert, this was the beginning of so many fucking ads in months to come. But unlike future episodes, I got a model on the first try. Man if it was always this fucking easy. OH MY FUCKING GOD.

She replied, we picked a time, I picked her up, we went to good ol’ Slave ghost filled Latta Plantation park and started shooting. At some point some guy who worked there spoke to us about how photography wasn’t allowed and I would have to pay an amount to shoot.

Look here ya fucking colonizer descendant:

1. I’m not paying a fucking fine to shoot with my fucking equipment. You can suck my whole dick, veins and circles.

2.My ancestors were slaves picking cotton in this god damn park that ya’ll filthy colonizers made a tribute park to. I’ll take photos here freely in honor of them. Now kill yourself ya descendant of murdering colonizing cunt.

Anyway, she did an outfit change and we migrated to the part of the park that wasn’t as plantationy. (New word bonus) That lasted for about another hour, that was about it and I dropped her off. When I did I told her I’ll get her the photos as I can, my calendar was gonna be busy compared to how it usually was with other photoshoots I had to do. More so since I was about to start working.

Holy Shit Jano you finally got a job after not 1 yr and 4 months? Congrats.Holy fuck, where was it?

Don’t Matter since I don’t work there anymore, it was insanely short lived. So one day she texts me where are her pictures? I tell her I’m working on them, I promise you I read nothing but attitude when she replied just send them to me. I don’t deal with unnecessary attitudes especially when I let you know before hand things are gonna be hectic for me. She got the pictures a few days later and that was the end of that. There was a plan to do another shoot with the lights I had got a few months prior but that never happened, fine by me.

Anyway the photos from that day are right here fam.

I wanna type more but at the same time, I wanna lay down and play some more Final Fantasy 7 while listening to J.Coles new cd again. I need to regain focus on my book. OMG.There are goals I’m hoping to meet within the next few months. The last thing I want is another existential crisis, did I say those are fun. Oh I didn’t because they ain’t. But in joyous news the new season of Dear White People comes out this w.end, so they may help my spirit in some fashion.

Before we go lets take a minute to pay our respects who lost their lives due to the Mad Titan Thanos. He definitely raped the souls out of their bodies. YES LAWD *Anderson Paak voice.

Lemonading

04 Wednesday Apr 2018

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twin 19_preview

Dear Friends of Jano,

We now return to our regularly scheduled program.

Huh?

A series of flashbacks of my art journey since the summer of that fuck boy 2016.

OOOOOOOOH

Right now that my special issues are out of the way, we go back to where we left off. 2017.

Man, two thousand fucking seventeen. Holy fuck my niggas it was a legit a god damn motha fucking journey.

Was it as bad as 2016?

No, but I promise you it felt like an RPG at some point in this journey. Spoiler alert we will get to that in a few issues.

But for now we are gonna enjoy simple times and talk about the first photoshoot I did of last year. Spoiler Alert I got paid for it. YES LAWD * Anderson Paak voice. I could afford life for a brief moment in my continued unemployment stint.

One Friday night in January while I was watching YuYu Hakusho when right at Yusuke and Sensui were starting their battle, my phone went off. Hermit me was like who in blue hell is emailing me. It was my actress homegirl England Simpson. Her and her twin sister wanted to do a photoshoot, and the theme of it was to be similar to Beyonce’s Lemonade music video.

Ok so this may piss some people off (Oh well) but I don’t like Beyonce enough to keep up with her music. She is ok but do I care when she release something, nah not at all.

So I watch the Lemonade video to see what they want. Real Shit main thing I saw was a plantation. What? It couldn’t have been just me. Then went to my Bff Google to see if Charlotte has any plantations and holy fuck it does. Legit wasn’t ready for that. Damn the monuments of slavery still fucking exist along side systematic racism and oppression.

FIX IT OBAMA PLEASE!!

Remember when I said 2017 was a journey. Well this was the first part of the literally journey. Spoiler Alert, I drove around a lot last year scouting locations.

So I spent my Sunday plantation hunting, yes that was a legit a thing.

The first place was a pass and honestly not worth describing past this sentence. Place two, hot damn. I arrive and as soon as I pull into the property this old white meth face lady hits the gas and follows me like I am a runaway slave. At some point we both open our windows, I lead to ask her some questions. Her answer was basically leave nigger before I Lynch ya.

Well damn.

Then she drove to chase someone else down. Look Bitch if you don’t want people to visit, close the fucking gate to your low budget Candy Land. Points if you caught the Django reference. Should have burned that whole bitch down.

Place three was a legit charm, well despite the fact that it was a plantation. As much as I hate slavery, I legit never saw myself looking for a plantation. Anyway Latta Plantation was the location and it ddef had that old colonial vibe of Lynch a nigger, rape his wife and then raise the child to be a foot stool, Ding Ding Ding we had a winner. Thank you for still existing a racist ass testament to the dark ages.

I email my friends and tell them that we are all set, Kinda, turns out they would be closed on the day we wanted to shoot.

Fuck. But do I give them points for being closed on Martin Luther King Jr day? Nah cuz it is still fucking plantation.

We defaulted to Independence Park which is off Hawthorne Lane….not Independence Boulevard….wait what? Fuck it. Anyway nigga it was cold as fuck. I need to get that out the way before we continue to establish the setting of this narrative. England and Ingrid had their poses already worked out and how they wanted to go, which made the shoot go faster was fine since it was cold as fuck. Did I say it was as cold as fuck earlier? Just making sure. I think I had one idea I wanted them to bring to life but that was it, and I’m Kool with that.

And that’s all folks, we came back to my place and they picked out their photos as well what they wanted edit wise.

To see some of the pictures from that project, click here.

Real shit I would type more but I think I’m done now. I’m going to indulge myself in Final Fantasy 7 for the first time. I know I’m 20 years late with that. Same with me just now starting to listen to Incubus. Either are a good distraction from recent depression episodes and this existential crisis. Yeah those are loads of fun, not really.

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Tag Archives: finalfantasy7

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