In the deep bowels of my spirit I think November went by entirely too fucking fast. It did. There is no reason for it to be 1 week before thanksgiving when this month just fraggin started.
As if.
At least the academic rape like sessions akin to my UNCG undergrad years of October are over. Sadly so is Fairy Tail, I just finished it last night. Kinda sad…BUT apparently a new season is coming next year. YEET.
And Bleach is coming back. BIG FUCKING YEET.
Enough of my usual pre flashback tangent. Time for another Tale of Jano’s Bizarre Art Adventure *cue music.
This issue begins back in 1998 on Planet Namek.
Nigga what the fuck??
Don’t worry there are time leaps. Anyway as I was saying it was Spring 1998. Goku just landed on Namek, defeated Recoome, and Vegeta dropped the term for the first time in an English dub. The world waited for what seems like an eternity (especially when you are 14) for the next episode of DBZ when Goku fought Burter and Jeice of the Ginyu Force. In summer 1999, VHS tapes of the last part of the Freeza saga started to be released. And my geek ass def start buying them as soon as they dropped. $24.00 per fucking tape with 3-4 episodes.
Man those purchases aged badly when said out loud.
Fall 1999 came. I was a sophomore in high school and i was approached by someone walking to the bus I legit never knew in life. He asked if i was ______, and i was like yea. He had heard I had the new season of DBZ tapes and i said yea.
Side note, life was so fucking simple then. Holy fucking fuck.
Anyway we formed a friendship founded in anime, and have still been friends since the tender age of 14.
AWWWWW tender moments.
Fast forward to Spring 2021.
He had hit me up one day as I was leaving the slave pit Jeff Bezos slave pit. He asked me could I do headshots of his girlfriend. I told him yea I actually have a light set which I have never used.
Wait what?
Yep, I got Christmas money for it in 2016 but I never had an opportunity to use it at all. I practiced on one of my friends kinda in 2017, but it wasn’t that deep.
We made a plans for the following Sunday, so that weekend i decided this may be a good time to practice since it is actually going to be used for an actual client.
Blessed be youtube. On Kami.
Sunday came, and i went to his place after I left the slave pit, changed and got my equipment.
Him and I chatted as I prepared everything. Practice makes perfect kids. Legit didn’t struggle as much this time settling up as the first time I did. I took test shots with my lights in various ways to minimize the harshness of the shadow being casted. Eventually his girlfriend came out and we started.
She was nervous at first. I told her to relax as best she can because it will show on her face and its not flattering.
It didn’t take long for her to relax and get comfortable. I encouraged to play some music and envision yourself as someone you admire. Sometimes I actually am inspirational when I’m not talking shit.
Spoiler Alert.
And that was it. The shoot lasted for an hour, despite that i took a plethora of photos as usual. When I was editing I realized I need to buy a damn tripod because there was no reason for some of those images to be blurry.
None, no such fuckin reason existed.
Hey Google, Play Joe Public live and learn.
As i said the issues that are drama free are the ones when its a client. The one’s where i am chasing an artistic vision my ancestors inserted in my head, MaAAAAAAN its like an anime arc or a final battle rpg fight.
Sephirtoth level shit…which I still need to beat.
FUCK….FUCK.
The rest of the time i was there we all hung out, he showed me the Snyder cut of Justice league. Which …i just remembered I need to finish that. I meant to but, yea life said fuck your summer plans nigga. fuck your plans nigga. *Dave Chappele Rick James fuck your couch voice.
At any rate to see my LinkedIn level images i snapped click here.
Next month is another client so it isn’t complicated. Avril Lavinge would be proud.
Anyone catch that? no? ok fuck yall.
I’m going try to relax without passing out…if that is a thing.
Moral of story, friendships formed in anime lead to opportunities that help your dreams…or some shit.
Wait what was the last issue about? Wait…oh yea….Whale Sharks….right literally almost forgot. Sorry having Corona kinda fucked me up.
OMG JANO!!!???!!!
Yea, I had it. The past 2 weeks were an unnecessary adventure. Do you remember in YuYu Hakusho when Genkai gave Yusuke her spirit orb and he had to absorb it in his body. Some moments he was fine and the next his whole body was on fire, as he laid there cationic.
Yea it was a lot like that, for me. I wish I had a fucking spirit animal to fucking flap around bringing me water. But as if. What would really make up for it would be walking into my old cotton field and murdering the person who caused this fiasco. But ya know murder is problematic (esp if you are black) and my throat lumps up even with allergy meds and a mask.
Ugh, so much fucking As if.
At least I lived, thats important.
*deep sigh.
Anyway.
Hi everyone.
Man I don’t know why I am having an issue with words this month. It’s annoying.
Fuck the segue then.
Today on Jano’s Bizarre Art Adventure, it is cosplay time. Come on tell a friend. Meh, that was trash.
As if.
It is now fall of the trying times of 2020. I just restarted working at a cotton field I hoped to never to return to. But desperation creates strange bed fellows. Desperation is honestly an over simplification of things. I legit hate job searching, so much. So fucking much but considering how I never got unemployment from the last slave pit, it was 6 months of no income, and I know it doesn’t take much or long to get hired figured I might as well.
Anyway around November I was scrolling through one of my social people timelines and I asked myself.
Why haven’t I asked my homeboy to model for me as Luke Cage?
We didn’t really come up with an answer, so I hit up my friend and asked would he be down. He was in fact down and we chose a date to do this.
Spoiler Alert, this is actually a really simple issue…and so are the next few too actually. This is kinda odd, but welcome all things considered.
So we chose a date, that wasn’t that hard. It just had to be after I woke up from a slave based nap. Side note the first few months I was working 4am to 8am (830 am, 9am depending how much Masta wanted us to pick.Fun) The place I chose was Camp North End, I had been here a few times, but for him it was his first time. Our GPS’s decided to send us in two different directions, and since I semi know the place I went to the area he was at. Probably for the best because the park situation was not the best where I was.
Anyway.
We met up and I said the classic line of I haven’t seen you since before the plague. No really, I hadn’t. Literally the last time was his bday w.end In February when we all partied and got brunch the day after as usual not knowing a month later when everything would be shut down and fucked with a big corona laced penis that would kill oh so many like a Thanos snap.
Tell me I’m lying.
We chatted as he got his gear, and I looked around as to where I wanted to shoot him first. Side note, aside from the Netflix show I know nothing about Luke Cage, I don’t. I had googled some Pinterest images of additional ways for him to pose, but I was literally assuming since he had been the character he would know about him.
And he did.
We shot for at least 2 hrs. It would have been more BUT there was a literal sea of people between us and the other side of where wanted to go. Some of them weren’t wearing mask either, in a pandemic….nah its time to go. So we did. we picked another date and met up ironically enough the day of my 2nd art show.
WOOT WOOT, I did another art show. which I prob won’t be doing an issue about. *shrugs*. I had thought about it, but meh idk. I’ve done 3 at this point, side note.
Anyway.
The 2nd half went the same as the first, the only difference was now I knew the capabilities of my lenses. Something I honestly should have known for years, but I didn’t. Probably would have helped out in some scenarios, but whatever we are here now.
Spoiler Alert, I was trained in photography the same way Goku was trained in martial arts. That nigga just met people and they thought him shit. Literally thats how I learned. Imagine if I actually went to class, I’d be so much better a yeet gawd.
Curious about this 2 part issue, haha comic pun. Click here.
I’m gonna go enjoy my last night of not working and work on my book. Ugh I don’t wanna go back, I don’t. I have to take a survey before I go back, it’d be a shame if I chose answers that gave me another week off.
OMG Jano, are you still sick?
Nah, but do they know that? Do I talk to anyone at that cotton field on a level that they know about my nickname, or my website? Do motha fuckas even read fully?
Well here we are March 2021, a whole year into a pandemic.
Fascinating.
Terrifying and sobering as well. I’m glad I gave up hope of going to concerts and anime cons again. At this point wondering when this pandemic is going to end is like how many episodes there are left until Namek explodes. Just long as shit for no valid reason.
Anyway.
Time for another care free issue with less drama than any previous issue, Rpg or anime I’ve watched in general.
Side Quest time.
It is weird typing issues like this. But also, Spoiler alert, I’m still in the search of the last 2 “infinity stones” that I began in 2017.
UGH. We can talk about that whenever the fuck I get there….hopefully soon. Watch me finish my comic series and my infinity gauntlet around the same time…prob next year. This is all I live for. Wait, is that why some of ya’ll are still tuning in each month? Am I your new favorite saga, Jano Bizarre’s Art Adventure.
AWWW SHIT NIGGA!!!
Need a reminder of said stones before I continue? Sure take a gander or reminder depending how often you have been to my website. I should name these stones while I’m at, right?
So here we are summer of the trying times of 2020, corona has crippled the world. Literally. Activities are limited, bodies are crippled and demolished by the fiend known as corona. Meanwhile protest for social justice spread like wild fire, since cops seem to literally get away with murder for killing black people.
STILL.
If this sounds like an intro to a dystopian nightmare it is because it was the trying times of 2020, spoiler alert.
I had finished coloring act 2 of my comic series, and decided that my break needed a break. After months of my back curling up like a snail shell design.I decided to focus on helping the nonprofit I am apart of, called Back to Black.
But Jano what is Back to Black?
WELL, essentially it is a non profit organization whose goal it is to help improve the black community. It was started by my friend who I met at UNC Greensboro. One day in Fall 2019 I was picking up an order from her hair and beauty store, because ya know I need to stay pretty and have my curls flowing.
YAAAAAAAAAS.
We decided to get dinner the next day catch up and talk about things, and she told me about her non profit dreams to help the black community. I told her you need to pursue the vision you were given, because if not there is no point in having them.
A month later when we met up for a college friends bday, I found out she added me to her staff. MAN I was not ready, at all. I have non profit experience from the past decade of cotton field experience, but still.
Moral of the Story, sometimes I can be inspiring when I am not talking shit.
Fast forward to last summer, so I guess we are now just…rewinding….wait how does this work?
Anyway. She had planned to do a photoshoot for the clothing line we were launching. The initial goal was to use our fellow staff members, but life was like nah.
Insert me, and having friends. There is a 90s after school lesson somewhere.
I hit up my friend who helped me get the 90s stone….I really need to think of better name for these stones. I asked her would she, her boyfriend and other friends be willing to model for us. The concept was simple, black people living their best life and be unapologetically black. They agreed luckily, because this literally was a last minute thing. We met up at Camp North End under the scorching summer sun. It was a pretty chill event actually….despite the sun emitting full oppression nigger heat.
Like I said this this isn’t a dramatic thing, no long expose’s, no existential dread.None, no such things exist…
In this issue.
We decided to do another one at another time, but in downtown Charlotte a few weeks later.
And that’s it. Fade to black. End scene.
Wait, not yet. But thats all for the events of this issue. To check out the byproducts from the day the sun enter the group chat go forth here. Also check out the music page and CBD hemp store of one of the models.
I know I said this at the beginning of my summer issues last year, but nigga its hot. Full Nigger heat is in effect, its more so aggravating since I can actually afford to use my ac this year and the shit is broke. American Home Shield is literally pissing me the fuck off.
Anyway. Let me not be a literal heated black man right now, at least one damn regard.
So this is one of those special issue things that wasn’t in the forecast for this year, but it is here now so fuck it.
To be honest this isn’t my first time going to ConCarolinas.
Sorta.
The first time I went was in 2014 but only for the room parties in the Hilton Hotel that it was being hosted at. I had no idea the con existed at all. I saw some other friends and made one I still talk to. While I was with them I saw George RR Martin, also didn’t know at the time who the fuck he was. But my friends did and they were like OMG thats the guy who made Game of Thrones, meanwhile I hadn’t heard of that either. Look Niggas I live in cave, is that established now? Good.
The next time I went was last year for the same reason. But this year it was for the actual con.
My favorite and only actress friend England Simpson, hit me up about having a guest pass and of course I was like Yasss, I’m so down. The day came and figured it would be a to wear my new DBZ Freeza Saga shirt. Yes I spell Freeza’s name that way and not Frieza the Amerikkka way.
Stay woke.
Anyway I arrive at the Con and I try to figure out where is my VIP pass that would have me feeling like a boss. I call her to let her know that I was in the building as I scoured around the venue. Side Note a pass really isn’t necessary at all, security was pretty lax to the point of non existence. But I’ll take that VIP Pass to feel like my Black Life Matters for once.
While I’m waiting for her, I overheard a group of people say her name. Usually I pay no mind to others conversations but for some reason I was like Huh, did someone say the name of my homegirl?
Not sure why I did that, but whatever. They were trying to remember her full name and I filled in the blanks. I introduced myself and then kept walking around because I am so awkward as fuck for no reason.
At some point I saw one of my homeboys who has a Guardian of Geekery podcast. Literally haven’t seen or talked to him in a year because adult friendships are hard kids. Spoiler Alert.
England came down shortly after, we got my badge and just walked around the venue. She spoke to other con goers and they were impressed by the panel she did the night before. From the sound of it I missed out, yay cotton field exhaustion causes me to miss out on all the kool things. We checked out the dealers room, saw the R2 D2 unit we saw last year.I asked her to take a picture of it with me. YEET.
The day went on as her, her family and I walked around until it was time to be part of a panel discussion. Also side note at this point I started to get hungry, so I started to zone in and out of life while planning of what I wanted to put in my mouth.
The first panel was about the adversity they have faced while attempting to be casted in films and such. Side note in case you haven’t paying attention England was the only black woman on the panel, everyone else white, white, white with sprinkles, white with wrinkles, and all white with privilege. Personally I was hoping for that Childish Gambino Stay woke ballad playing as they were illuminated by her truth, but instead they attempted to use their rationale to explain why things occurred the way they do.
Some white people can understand Namekian, Dothraki, Klingon, and R2D2’s native tongue but can’t understand white privilege at all.
Anyway, my hunger consumed me more and I mentally checked out of this underwhelming discussion. We left to go grab food and at some point some random person waved and I was like um me. It was one of those random people I spoke to earlier. The bad thing is I legit introduced myself to this girl, but never solidified her face in my head. Not gonna lie, didn’t think I was gonna see her again.
She was sitting with her mother and they reveled they were looking for her. The mother told her you have the full rights to illuminate her audience with what you have been through, regardless if it makes them feel uncomfortable or not since the people who gave you those experiences didn’t care for your comfort. Meanwhile I talked to aforementioned daughter about her personal journey in film, all while being hungry as fuck.
Look I’m sorry, but I was hungry as fuck ok. Having a convo while my brain saying feed me nigga feed me, is impressive.
Anyway fast foward, they exchanged contact info and recently met up to talk about stuff and thangs which hopefully have a ripple effect for all parties involved. Especially me since I kinda am the reason they met.
YAAAAAAS. Go Jano Go.
Anyway we ate from this food truck, and then we attended another panel that was about Microfilm. Annnnnnd…
Yea no lie, I wasn’t paying that much attention. Sooooo *hits fast foward button.
*Stops cassette.
Ok and that was pretty much it con wise. England was exhausted meanwhile I was still kinda awake. I took my equipment to my car and decided to check out this party this girl told me about during the con.
Ya’ll listen. I have been to lots of white parties in my day.Lots of them, but this was the first one where I heard my ancestors go
Nigga get out.
And I learned when the voice of your ancestors tell you to leave, you get the fuck out. Flashes of the episode of Dear White People when Reggie almost got killed came to mind and yea I couldn’t shake that. So I left.
The first year where I didn’t attend the hotel parties but the actual con.
Anyway to see the images from that day click here.
Before we get back to our regular scheduled program of Jano’s Photo Journey there is another issue coming this month.
Spoiler Alert, it has been a long time coming.
Anyway thats it for now, I gotta do my hair.It is a dry fucking mess, my ancestors would not be proud.
Also since Black Mermaids are trending, go check out my mermaid saga. Especially if you aren’t out here looking ridiculous saying that mermaids can’t be black.
Here we are the last issue of the year, well last planned issue of the year. Unless something interesting happens….yea this is the last issue of the year. Usually I would start off with some random blurbs about the current circumstances of my life, but this issue is lengthy as fuck.
Jano how long?
Think RPG playtime, final anime boss battle long.
DAMN!
Yea, trust me living it felt a lot longer. OMG it felt like waiting for Planet Namek to explode.
In April of 2017 I thought it be kool to do a shoot about a mermaid. I don’t know if it was because of the internet or the voice of my ancestors, but that idea was planted in my head and damn it stuck. Oh how it stuck. It stuck like a super chain of STDs a serial rapist got for violating the personal space of others who had their own STDS..
As usual I went to Craigslist to sweep through the various communities in hopes to find one that can possibly bring my idea to life. But this time I had another problem to figure out. So in case you haven’t been paying attention I live in Charlotte, North Carolina. And for those who weren’t paying attention in elementary school social studies, it lies within the Piedmont region. Which, spoiler alert, means that there isn’t any coastlines or beaches near me. At best there are lakes and rivers, but that is about it.
So not only did I have to find a model, I had to figure where the fuck I was going to do this shoot at. I made an ad for help on that and color me shocked that it didn’t take that long. This dude replied and said that he would be willing to help me out and let me shoot it at as his fathers house. His father resides in South Carolina for some reason and he was house sitting for him. He sent me a picture of the area and I went YES LAAAAAWD * Anderson Paak voice. He wanted to meet first, which makes sense. I let him know at some point that I was black male, cuz we all know sometimes being black comes at ya fast even when you are doing ordinary things such as living.
Real Shit, I was nervous as fuck about this.
But Jano, haven’t you met people off the internet before?
Duh, but never has it been an elder white guy who was going to use his parents house to let me do a photo shoot to fulfill my art dreams. Even typing that now it sounds odd. Fuck, shits crazy.
Despite that we set a date to meet one May morning. The things we do for our dreams.I drove over to his house, with a box cutter in my bag and my home girl informed of my location just in case shit got weird, well weirder. Dude was odd, kool, but odd. The scariest moment of the whole conversation was when he told me how he got rid of stray cats that roamed into his yard. My niggas eyes were so lifeless when he talked of their disposal.
At some point we went to his dad’s house and OMG, the picture he had sent me didn’t do it justice. I fell more in love with the photographic potential more so. OMG. However, there was only problem with this whole scenario. Due to the nature of this dudes job of being an organ delivery driver, if he got called to do a delivery that shoot would have have to be postponed for another time since he wanted to be there on the property. That nagging factor bothered me. I told him I would be back in contact with him once I solidified a model and a time, which was true at the time. But you know life it is a fickle cunt. The girls who had shown interest prior to the meeting went full ghost when I reached back out to them. BLARGH.
But.
Before we go back to the model hunt, lets get these other details out the way. First off the location, since back up plans are a necessary thing. The place creepy cat killer had showed me was near Latta Plantation Park. Yes, the place I mentioned several issues ago. On a whim I decided to walk the path less traveled, Literally. When I was there before I had never walked any of the trails, so I figured might as well.
Yay for whims.
The environment was so Shway for the narrative I wanted to present. At the end of the trial there was a peninsula that had a nice view of the lake and barely any traces of humanity. Side note when I was surveying the area, there were people Jet skiing, I was so hoping one of them would drown and die. Anyway. Safe to say this was my location, I legit never contacted that creepy cat guy again. He has a name, but honestly at this point it doesn’t matter.
As the search for a non fickle model continued, I had to craft some props for this shoot. Timeline wise, we are in mid June at this point. I legit have never crafted shit in my life, aside from art projects in school I never had to. But you are surprised what you learn to do when there is an aesthetic you have in mind. Shout out to Youtube and Pintrest teaching how to use my hands in more magical ways. The goal one Friday June night was to make a mermaid bra and crown. Hobby Lobby and Walmart is where I got most of my supplies, in particular seashells, pipe cleaner, ribbon, and hot glue gun, There was a tiara I needed, which I promise you I have seen a million times before this day BUT the day I actually was going to buy it. Nope couldn’t be found at all. I legit bounced from several different stores to find a fucking tiara. Blessed be Super Target for having it and a bag of jewels. As for the tail, one of my home girls was a mermaid for the last halloween. She said I could borrow her dress, she didn’t have the exact dress but had one similar that I can make it look mermaid tail esque.
Now for the models. Side note, shout out to it being a snow day because real shit this is a lot to navigate through my memories. If I had picked cotton today this wouldn’t be getting done.
Anyway, the model search. Because that is the one thing that is missing from this whole fucking saga.
Spoiler alert; the upcoming contains fuckery, confusion, betrayal and more fuckery than should be encountered.
*Deep Breath*
At this point we are still in June, the girls who had expressed interest were no longer replying and others were replying who honestly I didn’t like their face or vibe. I told ya’ll I’m picky, no apologies.
I was following one girl on IG, and decided to DM her to see if she was down for the concept. And she was….kinda.
When I reached out again to see if she was available for the next week, she had informed me that she got signed to a modeling agency. Congrats I told her and the convo ended there oddly. I hit her back a week later to see if she was free the following w.end, she asked if her manager had informed me of her rates.
Rates?
Bitch a few weeks ago you were so down for the TFP. Now you done got brand new and talking about some rates? The fuck you mean rates? Look I respect the craft, but I can’t afford the craft. Especially when I am working erratic seasonal project jobs with end dates after not working for a year and 4 months. Maybe when I am full level up adult with a stable job, but right now I am relying on the kindness of strangers who with mutual interest to help me make my art dreams come true. I told her I’ll have to pass because of the whole job situation. A legit reason because I was laid off again mid July and didn’t work again until September.
FUCK.
This shit is aggravating. Even recounting this arc is aggravating. I wanna drink some Jano Juice to soothe my spirit. Maybe this weekend.
Anyway
So there was another girl who replied to one of my witch photoshoot ads. I never replied to her about that because obviously I found someone who matched what I wanted more so. But this girl had a mermaid tattoo, so I thought to ask her. MAAAAAAN I shouldn’t have. She had asked how much was she going to paid.
Bitch hold up. In the ads I am very upfront about the only compensation will be copies of the final images. I was so clear about that, so fucking clear. There legit is no room for interpretation. At all. Aside from that maybe you should not reply with ads with dirty bathroom selfies. you pasty posh cunt face.
Ok I’m done for now.
At this point it is July and I’m aggravated, so fucking aggravated. I placed a final ad on Craigslist and I won’t lie I aired out all my grievances. In particulate don’t waste my time with this, if you aren’t serious about this please don’t waste my time and please read all of the ad before asking me stupid fucking questions.
Of course someone replied….
Spoiler Alert; this is the climax of the story. Oh so much climax. That sentence probably does not make sense but fuck it.
Her name was Marlene, and she wanted to know more about the project. I told her and at some point she shared how she always felt she has been a mermaid all of her life. Who the fuck am I to argue that you felt like a mythical creature? If thats what you feel when you wake up, feel it. In my mind it will translate great in the images. Fuck Big Dick Energy, You got that mermaid energy. She inquired about a tail and since it actually seemed like I finally had a model for this fucking project, I figured I actually extend the effort to make it. I hit up my home girl who helped me with Demented Rose and Scarlet Tracks since she is big into cosplay and crafting. I was hoping she had a quick way to make a tail since every way I saw was complicated as fuck. Her answer was to buy one, and I was like nah. I’m legit not spending over 100 on fucking mermaid tail, in case you guys haven’t been paying attention I’ve been dealing with some fickle ass cunts. And I didn’t wanna be stuck with a tail for a model who went ghost on me.
So my homegirl decided to help me out, she said would be willing to help me out. She had recently brought one and would be willing to let this girl use her tail if they were the same size to help me achieve my dreams.
Ya’ll I felt like a person in that one moment. Kinda how in How The Grinch Stole Christmas when his heart grew 3 sizes bigger for some sentimental reason which I can’t exactly remember. She was Cindy Lou Hoo and I was the Grinch who was essentially at the spiritual place of fuck this.
Spoiler Alert,I have a legit complex in case you couldn’t tell.
Emotional Moment Over.
Ironically enough new girl and my friend both wear the same size. The next thing we had to do was see if the bra and crown I made fit. The crown did, but the bra that was something else. SO I let her borrow some of my supplies that I brought to make a bra, we had set a date, I told my friend and we were all in agreement.
…..
Well…
August came as well the week of the shoot, and I messaged new girl asking are we still down for the weekend and was the bra done. She told me that she had been busy with work and school.
Ok here is the thing, I checked UNCC’s school calendar. School hadn’t started yet, it wasn’t going to start until a week later. But I assumed she meant getting ready for school. Man when your ancestors tell you fuckery is afoot, you listen to your ancestors. Thursday came and I asked was she still down for the shoot, and she replied saying that wouldn’t be.
UGH.
So I had to tell my homegirl lives in Raleigh, who took off from work not to come down. She wasn’t happy about it. I can’t blame her, I would be pissed off too. So the next day since my shoot wasn’t happening, I decided to go scout Midtown Park for a future photoshoot I wanna do at some point. I get home and check my snapchat…..this bitch is driving to Baltimore, Maryland.
WHORE!!! I COULD KILL YOU!!!!!! NOT ONLY DID YOU WASTE MY TIME!!!! YOU WASTED MY FRIENDS TIME WHO WAS WILLING TO ME OUT!!!!. I SHOULD CUT YOUR BOULDER SIZE BREAST OFF AND THROW THEM AT YOUR FUCKING HEAD YOU FILTHY SNOBBISH CUNT!!!!!!!
*deep breath.
I was so god damn mad.I wanted no still want to set her apartment on fire and hope someone beats her head with a brick as she tries to escape.
I apologize to my friend, for the fact that her time was wasted and this snobbish bitch wasn’t as professional as she seemed. I asked her would she be my mermaid to help me out, she texted me after I got the email saying she would do anything to help me out. Legit felt joy and felt like I mattered to someone. I have never heard those words uttered to me before, at all. And still haven’t since then.
There goes that trash complex again.
Me and her picked a date, and at some point she came down. The first time I had seen her in a year, awwww tender moments. Problem was she forgot the bra, so we had to wait another week to do the shoot. She apologized but it was kool, at this point one more week wasn’t going to hurt all things considered. She came back down a week later, she wanted to stop by Hobby Lobby and got some supplies.
This was it and it was finally happening. 4 months later it was finally happening. Ya’ll have no idea how arduous the past 4 months had been.You legit don’t. At this point we are the on the first weekend of September. I just got a new job, the sun is starting to set earlier and the wind has gotten a chill in it that hasn’t been felt in months. Luckily the area I want to shoot my friend is pretty vacant, as in there is no one there to obstruct the background. People are legit the worse.
The narrative I had in mind was ironically similar to The Little Mermaid, Mermaid washes on shore and explores the new world.I say ironic because I never saw The Little Mermaid. Well I saw it in Spanish in 11th grade, so that doesn’t really count. She switched between her tail and the dress of my friend. At some point that fall chill became a thing and she got cold, so I tried to wrap it up as soon as I can. Defiantly didn’t want her to catch a cold because of me, my conscious can’t deal with that. When it was all said and done we went to get something to eat and watched youtube videos, as my body remembered I need to stretch before I do these shoots that involve me acting like Nightcrawler. Acrobatic as fuck even though I ain’t been to the gym in years.
But wait, before we show the pictures from this saga. We need to finish the arc first.
But Jano, what do you mean….oh that Siren faced no ass bastard.
Well, at some point she called me a week after we were supposed to shoot. But yo wtf do we have to talk about? Honestly I am not a confrontational person, I’m pretty chill until you piss me off. Waisting me and my friends time is def a way to piss me off. *Yusuke Urameshi voice. The day after me and my homegirl did our photoshoot, I checked my snapchat and Siren face had posted a video of the shells and a net saying something about mermaid things or something to that effect. A few days later there was a photo she posted about with her mermaid hashtags. Oh nah, I need my shit back. See I only let her borrow those materials to help me out, not to shoot with some other nigga.
I emailed her and we agreed on a time that week…man that meeting was so awkward. Every cell in my usually chill being wanted to take the net off the wall and Lynch her like they lynched black people in the south, but I kept it together. My father has this saying don’t piss on me and tell me it is rain. This bitch legit treated me like R.Kelly did those teenagers in the early 2000s, metaphorically. I’ll be damn if I let a cunt whore piss on em. The lies she told of how she really wanted to do the shoot but was really busy. Bitch you did the shoot, you didn’t do it with me but you did it. Pretty sure you never even thought of doing a mermaid shoot until you saw that Ad on Craigslist.
Moral of Story, Fuck it I don’t know. Infer one for yourself. But if you get a chance to choke a bitch with a net they made that is hanging on the wall, take that opportunity. Life will figure out the rest later.
I told ya’ll this was a long story, if you actually read the whole thing. Congrats your reward is here.
Hell typing this was exhausting as fuck. Shout out to this snow day again because otherwise I would have been too exhausted to recall this fuckery. I felt like I just wrote a paper when I was at UNCG.
In other news that is fuckery free, I finally finished storyboarding my comic Azure Ascendance. Now the only thing left to do is color the remaining issues. YAAAAASSSS got the impending coloring coma.At least I got that done, sadly I didn’t get all the photoshoots done this year that I wanted. Hopefully the last 3 won’t be no where near this difficult as this was, hopefully. MAN, even typing this arc was a headache.
Anyway. thats it folks. The next issue won’t be no where near this heavy and filled with salt. Its actually the last photoshoot I did of 2017, which will be the first issue…of next…..year…..FUCK IT.
