Tag Archives: Spotify

Let The Dead Watch

02 Sunday Sep 2018

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unspecified-18

Dear Friends of Jano,

Before we get started I just want to publicly lament how I couldn’t accomplish any of my travel goals this year because of typical job fickleness. Maybe next year I can I go afford to go to DragonCon, AfroPunk, and Charleston SC.Oh the goals I had this year, and how life scoffed at said goals. Maybe next year. Hell I hope next year I can afford to use the air conditioning,NIGGA it is September and it is still hot as fuck. NIGGA!! At this point my body has adjusted to the heat, mostly.

At least Eminem dropped a new CD which I heard is fiya. Its the little things in life that give me pleasure, especially the big victories that allude me.

ANYWAY.

Spoiler Alert. The next few issues about my photography journey will be filled with mass amounts of Shade, Salt and Sarcasm. More so than usual.

So who remembers the movie The Craft? Ya know the movie with 4 witches on the west coast. Right, well I just recently saw the movie for the first time in December of the cunt bag year of 2016.

Damn Jano, why so late?

Look we can have a whole discussion of all the movies I never saw growing up, if you really want that disappointment just email me.

I saw it and my spirit liked it, so much to the point that it inspired to do a Craft themed photoshoot. April 2017 came and I took to Craigslist and placed an ad, figured since I got a model in a quick fashion last time it would be just as easy.

Things were not that easy. Not at All.

When I planned this out in my head I wanted this to be a two parter. Half of it would take place on UNCC’s campus and the other half in a graveyard. Not any graveyard, I wanted a graveyard with actual headstones not just plaques. I had to google graveyards, because not like I spend times chilling in graveyards. Well there was that one time back in summer 08 when I was home for break. Two of my friends were like lets go hang out at a graveyard and drink late Saturday night. Spoiler Alert, that shit was kinda odd at least for me, for my two homeboys it was just another night.. Fear of being arrested is a very real thing. But man things were simpler back then.

Anyway.

My graveyard search didn’t last long, literally the first place I decided to check out had the atmosphere I was looking for. Thank you Elmwood Cemetery. Now for the model.

MAAAAAAN Listen. Arduous does not define the fuckery of this process. Holy fucking fuck of AIDS cunt fuckdom. I did get some candidates who I were legit impressed by, but these basic face Beckys would stop replying. How the FUCK do you sign up to do a witch themed photoshoot but have issues taking pictures in a graveyard? Basic fucking white girls.

Dear White People, don’t claim a lifestyle that you ain’t really down for.

The other candidates who replied to the Ad, I legit didn’t like their aesthetic. At all. Spoiler Alert, I am picky at times. Despite the desire to knock out a project I’m not just gonna accept anybody. What type of nigga do you think I am? Gosh.

There was one girl who was totally excited for the entire concept. She was fine with the graveyard, I liked her face (well how she made up her face) and I genuinely thought she was going to bring my project to life.

Nope.

At some point this little pale,sour face, anorexia nervosa, spoiled cunt stopped replying to my messages when I reached out to see if she was still down. I think I saw her working at a Starbucks at Northlake mall. I legit wanted to bash her head into the pastry container and pour hot coffee on this bitch, after I pummel her to death with a god damn scone.I bet her pussy smells like rotten garlic and a spoiled Mcdonald egg mcmuffin.

Side note, I’m actually a really chill and lackadaisical person….until you waste my time or piss me off.

At this point we are in July. Yes Friends of Jano, fucking July.

A girl replies and says she wants to model for me but thinks because she is black I won’t pick her. I tell her I don’t give a fuck as long I think she can help bring my idea to life. So she replied back with her photo and I was like YAAAAAAS. I liked her face, especially since unlike the others girls who replied she didn’t have much if any make up on in any of the photos she sent me.

And now ya’ll know where I got the term basic face Beckys, because majority of the white girl population have very beat down and bland faces without make up. Google it. Even though I don’t think this should be news.Some don’t and I applaud ya’ll for over coming that genetic defect.

Anyway we make plans to meet one day. I get downtown and try to figure out a place to park, I almost had to push this old white woman into traffic when I asked her about downtown parking and she replied with a preppy attitude. Bitch I hope your lover gives you an STD, and lets a homeless person piss on your sunburnt skin.

I told ya’ll I’m full of high grade sodium chloride for the next few issues.

We meet at the Graveyard and we vibe with each other the entire time. She tells me she hasn’t modeled in a while, I tell her its Kool as we both played off each others ideas. I had to go get quarters for our parking meters at some point, as I did that she did an outfit change. The only problem I had the entire time that there was a homeless guy who 1. Looked like he was gonna take out stuff and 2. This nigga was in the back of my potential shots so I had to rearrange what I wanted to.

OMG Jano, I can’t believe you actually did a photoshoot in a graveyard.

Look, I have dreams to follow. Plus according to all the tombstones I’m pretty sure everyone buried were old racist fucking white people. And I took great joy in trampling over their hate filled graves. I would legit fuck in a graveyard, pull out and bust my nigga cum from my bbc. Bukake for all the dead racist spirits.

Reparations Nigga!! *Dave Chappelle voice.

Anyway.

When it was over we went Amelies and she told me about the type of photos she wanted to do. I was like word sounds fun. None of them have happened yet but maybe one day hopefully. In the meantime to see the photos from this day that took 3 months in the fucking making click here.

Next issue will be special issue for lack of better words, so it won’t be any where near this amount of shade and hostility. Not to say it won’t be there but it will be diluted compared to this. Until then I’m gonna finish up rewatching Gundam Wing. 18 years later I still love that show.

Sunday Stroll

01 Wednesday Aug 2018

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unspecified-8

Dear Friends of Jano,

Yo On God my nigga, I hate summer rain forecast. How am I supposed to accurately plot out my life if it says it is going to rain, but yet it is as dry as all the old cum in my belly button. Now Summer Rain By Carl Thomas is playing in my head, great because I don’t have enough over emotional ass songs playing in my head.

Anyway.

Remember when I said I did 3 photoshoots last April, well this is the final one. AWWW the simple times of picking a location, asking someone to model for you, then shooting them on a set date. MAN, what a time to be alive.

But Jano what do you mean?

You’ll see in upcoming issues. Holy Fuck you will see.

Anyway.

Back in the cunt bag year of 2016 in August when I was unemployed and foolishly trying to get a stable job as a web designer.

I went to a crash course coding networking event for the now defunct as fuck Iron Yard. It was in Uptown/ Downtown Charlotte in this building called Packard Place.While I was waiting for this event aka waste of my time to start, I stared out the window and saw Romare Bearden Park. I started thinking it would be fun to do a shoot there.

Fast Forward to March 2017.

Two of my friends from college decided to visit me. At some point when they were having a conversation which I could contribute nothing to, so I started scrolling on Instagram.

Jano, that is so rude.

Fuck off, ya’ll do it too.

Anyway, I was scrolling and saw a photo from one of my former slave coworkers from the plantation, IKEA. At some point I decided to ask if she would model for me, she said yea, and I internally while externally went YAAAAS.

I promise ON GOD, ON GOD MY NIGGA, this is the last time that a model search will be this fucking easy for me. I legit just face palmed.

Anyway.

Even though me and her worked together at that cunt customer cotton field for 3 years, I legit didn’t know anything about her or fashion sense. Real shit majority of the time I saw her I talked shit to her. But not hardcore shit that would make someone do a Hannah Baker, but like soft core shit that you could put on a ice cream cone and serve up with a smile.

I just threw up in my mouth a little with that analogy.

We met up so I could browse her closet and we picked an outfit each, picked a date, and caught up about life after. The next day I went to downtown to plan a route for how I wanted this shoot to go. Because ya know its important to storyboard mentally how you want events to go that you are planning. At least in my world.

Alicia Keys so simple is so playing in my head right now.

The day came and I was one of the few who realized that drinking and driving isn’t a good thing and spent the night at a friends house after a bday party. Safety First. Fast Forward through slow service at Midnight Diner, Goodbyes, college buddy group photos, and me going home to showering (because ya know hygiene is key), it was shoot time.

She had never modeled before and I was like girl you’ll be fine.

And she was, Legitly.

She had a lot of excitement and I didn’t regret my choice. She channeled her Americas Next Top Model as she got comfortable being in front of the camera. I almost felt bad for all the soft serve shit I gave her in the cotton field. Almost.

Everything for the next few hours were Kool….. except when my nuts met a guard rail. HOLY FUCK OF FUCKING FUCKED CUNTS, FUCKING JOB HAZARDS. She told me to shhh my yelling because a child was near by. NIGGA FUCK THAT CHILD!!. My tender freshly clean nuts just got more tenderized by this fucking metal guard rail. NIGGA!!!!

Spoiler Alert, if we do a shoot and I get hurt in an extreme way I will yell. No fucks shall be given about the opinions and ear drums of the surrounding people. None, no such fucks shall exist.

Anyway to see the by product of this blissfully planned day go here.

In case ya’ll have been wondering why I keep emphasizing how easy things went is because the next four photoshoots I talk about were arduous as when Vegeta was trying to become a Super Saiyan. Didn’t get that anime reference? Fine, it was like trying to avoid spoilers on the internet when you haven’t seen an episode or movie yet. Actually I rather try to avoid spoilers then deal with the fuckery I dealt with last summer.

Ironically enough despite planning it is happening again this year.

Spoiler Alert, the next few issues will be full of shade, sarcasm and salt. So much Salt that you would think I was gonna put Mortons Salt out of business.

The moment you realize that your Art Journey is similar to a Role Playing Game.

Have I leveled up yet?

The Art of Trombone

18 Wednesday Jul 2018

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unspecified-3Dear Friends of Jano,

NIGGA ITS HOT!!! Like Disrespectful as fuck hot. Oppressively hot. Do I even need this skin hot. Put Deodorant on your genitals hot. Field Nigga slave empathy hot.I’ll def take this over winters frigid ways but holy fuck, is it this heat wave that necessary for the culture?

This issue is coming later than usual this month because honestly I didn’t feel like typing. I didn’t. Not to say that I haven’t typed anything this month, but it wasn’t anything lengthy. Ya know nice little blurbs, nothing more.

Anyway here we are finally.

So back in the Days of the Dead issue, I said that the initial shoot I was going to talk about had to be delayed because my coon college friend didn’t have one of  his websites ready. Well it’s ready now and I can commence talking shit about him, and the photoshoot of that April Saturday.

But Jano didn’t you say you are friends?

Spoiler Alert, you are right. But every since I’ve met this nigga back in my  2nd semester  during Spring Semester 2003 at UNCG,  he has talked more shit than I thought humanly possible. If I had a Myspace style  friend ranking of people who talked shit, he would be in the top 10. So I’m allowed to talk about this big nostril, cone headed, Vegeta Bashing, shit talking,  blasting rappers that irk your soul (Damn Gucci Mane), detritus, diseased country bama, scum of the earth. This nigga would have you feeling like you may wanna follow in Hannah Bakers footsteps.

But despite that, he is a very gifted negro when it comes to the trombone.

Damn Jano, are you satiated yet?

Right now I am.

At any rate, My homeboy Brain called me one day and asked me could I do a photoshoot for him for his new music website. Look at Niggas following their true passions in life, even though they are exuding scum essence, YASSSS.

Sorry, not sorry.

I gave him a price, he agreed and we picked a Saturday that worked with our schedules. Legit 2nd photoshoot I got paid for last year, sadly it was also the last but whatever I could finally put some toward my tattoo fund.

So fucking close now. So…fucking….close….

I drove to Greensboro hoping that it doesn’t pour down rain anytime soon. It was cloudy as fuck as I was driving up there. Legit it was more shady than anything that has ever came out of his mouth in all the years I’ve known him.

Damn there I go again. I promise me and this nigga are actually Kool. On God.

I get to his place and we head to a park that I legit never went to or heard of any of the time I lived in Greensboro from 2002 to 2010. We arrive and we see all these white kids dressed up.

What white nonsense is this?

Then it hit us its Prom Season, OOOOOOOh that shit. But its legit pretty crowded, so we walk to where  little white children are sparse to none. Luckily it was a big park. He tells me he has never modeled before, I tell him to play his trombone to relax and honestly to pretend I’m not there. It honestly went well, considering I wasn’t familiar with this park at all and he never modeled a day in his scummy puss filled soul life.

Everything was good until it started pouring down raining, and that far distance we walked to get away from a bunch of acne faced teenagers we had to run to get back to his car. You ever see 2 people run in a torrential downpour, hoping not to ruin their equipment, and not slip and bust their ass?

It is probably funny as shit watching, but being in said downpour nope not so much. No such fun exist.

Anyway, the rest of the day involved us going to meet up with some of our friends at some place. I legit promise every white boy at the bar my friends and I  ended up at looked like they idolized Brock Turner and  had rape intentions. I don’t apologize for that shit, I don’t. If you are mad you probably ain’t shit and think that violating ass cunt was justified, kill yourself creepy bastards.

To see some of the images that occurred before we got rained out, go here. And if you need a trombone or piano player, or a music lesson check out his website. And if you need to purchase an instrument check out his new store site as well.

See this nigga has some value in life after all.

Moral of the Story. Be careful of how much shit you talk to your friends because one day you could be exposed for filth on said friends website.

There is probably another lesson about following your dreams and passions, but eh not today.

Anyway  I’m all typed out for the month.  I’m gonna go play Final Fantasy 7 until next time.Damn Cloud, your backstory is tragic as fuck.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Antics

27 Wednesday Jun 2018

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antics2

Dear Friends of Jano,

Pretty sure most of you looked at the picture and guessed what this issue is about.

Spoiler Alert, you probably ain’t wrong.

I finally saw Deadpool 2 today, literally late as fuck compared to the rest of humanity. But the good part I had the theater to myself…mostly. I hate going to the movies when it is first released. Legit too many people for my liking. Plus if it is a super hero movie there are kids. I hate kids. I legit hate the children with all their noise, noise and noise.

Jano, Did you just quote the Grinch?

Yes because that is the way I feel in my heart.  I went to go see Fantastic Four back in 2005, and there were kids asking their parents could they get Fantastic Four toys after the movies. NO YOU CAN’T GET NO DAMN TOYS JOHNNY, YOU ARE RUINING MY MOVIE EXPERIENCE. CUNT!!

No Apologies for calling a child a cunt.

Somehow after avoiding weeks of spoilers, I legit managed to be surprised by everything that happened when I saw it. Despite how many times I say Spoiler alert, I will not actually say anything that will spoil the movie for any of you.

But Jano you just called a child a cunt.

Whats your point?

The point of this whole issue is that I enjoyed this movie so much, that I drew the image at the top before it came out months ago.

Wait what?

Yep, The result of not giving a fuck about the cotton you are picking at work. I legit didn’t know anything about the movie except that Cable and Domino were going to be in it.

Before we go on, can we take a minute to appreciate Zazie Beats as Domino. YES LAWD *Anderson Paak Voice.

Oh yea that there was going to be time travel, because duh Cable.

Its so ironic to see him as Cable when 2 months ago he snaps away half the universe as Thanos. Awwww tender moments.

At any rate, the point of this image was to promote my comic series Azure Ascendance, just in case it wasn’t obvious with Deadpool holding an issue.

SMH y’all ain’t woke.

To see it in gallery format, go forth yonder here.

Moral of the story. Deadpool 2 makes my soft boy parts throb with joy like the first one.  I hope when my friends watched it, I hope they thought about me like they said they did during the first one.

Blah I have the biggest hunger headache right now, even though I have been eating like…something…that eats a lot. FUCK IT!!!

Go watch the movie, bring lotion or you’ll regret it. I did.

I want cheese sticks.

 

 

Go Go Gadget Indiegogo

09 Saturday Jun 2018

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Dear Friends of Jano,

I legit debated if I wanted to try this given the results of last time.

Jano, what happened last time? Why are you being vague as fuck? Why do you ask yourself questions in 3rd person?

Back in 2016 when I started this Art Journey and was unemployed as fuck, I decided to make an Indiegogo page to raise funds to get some camera equipment.

Spoiler Alert: No one donated anything. None, no such donations existed.

I legit saw the most random of causes from help me get a new pet to I need a new video game system because my ex girl friend destroyed it when she saw I cheated on her. Legit was being funded by people, meanwhile I got nothing.

My faith in humanity dropped more so, as my inadequacy and trash complex grew more than the Grinches heart when he heard the Whos down in Whoville sang after he stole EVERYTHING.

What did Charles Hamilton say in that song off his mixtape Pink LavaLamp, oh yea

“I once was the loser, now I’m older still the same loser.”

I promise I think that may be one of my theme songs in life.Nihilism at its finest.

Anyway.

I was on wikipedia a few weeks ago looking up Dear White People after I finished watching Season 2. I found out that the movie was funded through an Indiegogo page. And that is how we got here.

Legit thought maybe, just maybe, my comic series Azure Ascendance could gain the money for copyrights through a fundraiser.

But Jano don’t you have a college degree and that hasn’t that got you good high paying jobs?

HA, Nigga you funny. The only thing I have gotten is bullshit low paying retail jobs, or seasonal based projects that believe lay offs are life. I am about to be on my 10th cotton field since graduation. None of which allow me to fully support myself.

Stay In School kids…..could you taste the sarcasm, salt and shade? You could? YAAAASSS, deep throat it, no teeth.

Anyway. My hope is that this will help me get the copyright funds for the rest of my series which I have dedicated my soul to. The same way Thanos wants to balance the universe is my dedication to this project, yea its that deep.

Minus the genocide of the universe part….maybe.

To check out my fundraiser, go forth and click here.

Oh yea here too. Because why not try my luck on two different fund raising sites.

Nevermind the fact that luck was non existent 2 years ago. SMH

I’m actually going to pass out with dreams of my comic series being on Netflix one day. I would say Toonami, but I don’t want my material censored ;).

Days of the Dead

02 Saturday Jun 2018

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dd15

Dear Friends of Jano,

First and foremost, I just heard the death of Drake via Pusha T. Damn it was Degrassi all over again. He just lost his whole life, all of it. DAMN homey, In high school you were the man homey.Well not really. You were Wheel Chair Jimmy at some point. Look at history repeating itself.

Anyway.

This months issue is a special edition. Why?

  1. I legit didn’t feel like waiting until next year to talk about an event that I may not attend again.
  2. This month was originally going to be talking about the photoshoot I did with a friend I did last year. BUT this nigga doesn’t have his website ready for me to promote it. SMH

If you add 2 plus 2, you get this special edition/ filler issue.

“Call it what you want motha fucka, I got a quota and I’m hitting it.”

Bonus points if you can recognize where that quote came from. Not really.

So a few weeks ago my actress home girl (England Simpson) texted me that she had an extra pass to the Days of the Dead Convention and asked me did I want to go. I said sure, and asked that most important question ever, will there be food there? Sadly there wasn’t going to be, that was a sign…..

Spoiler alert, I’m just be ominous,dramatic and foreboding for no real fucking reason.

Saturday came with me waking up early as fuck for no reason, which is sad cuz I passed out late the night before after watching a new episode of 13 reasons. I watched another episode of 13 reasons Season 2 (shit is legit dramatic crack), tried to download Marvel Vs Capcom Infinite Crisis and then got ready. Since she told me there wasn’t going to be any food vendors, my black ass went to go get me a Korean sandwich and a Boba Tea.

Spoiler Alert, I need food in my life to function especially if I’m going to be doing anything artistically.

Anyway.

I get downtown and meet her at the parking lot that she is at. Nigga, Parking was 15 fucking whole dollars. 15 dollars and ya’ll motha fuckas ain’t feeding anyone?!!!

Nigga fuck ya’ll and everything you stand for.

So I park after having my wallet raped, met my home girl and we precede into the venue. It was a horror con, similar to Mad Monster Party. And just like Mad Monster party white people stared like they have never seen a real life black person before.

Dear White people, even though you kill us off first in horror movies doesn’t mean that you won’t see us at horror theme conventions. I thought we covered this last time. What are ya’ll worried I would kill you like Candy Man? Spoiler Alert: If I could I would :).

Real Shit though, I barely saw any black people though. I promise you the aesthetic was mostly dirty, rancid white people that looked like they didn’t bathe. I can support that statement with facts, I had to stop breathing because the amalgamation of funk that raped my nose. It literally felt like an aroma-esque that lynched my nostrils similar to how what disobedient slaves would get for wanting to be treated like a person.

Tangent over.

At some point while I was waiting for her to leave the bathroom, Candy Man walked by me. It took me a minute to realize that it was Candy Man. First off that is a tall ass negro. No, Like Real shit, That nigga is tall as fuck.

My friend was a panel speaker on what it was like to be a woman film maker in the film industry. Before her panel it was a bunch of dudes who literally took most of the room with them when they left. Well damn.

England and the other four female film makers talked about their influences, past experiences in the industry, as well as the adversity they have encountered in the industry. England also talked about the extra layer of racism that she encountered being a black woman film maker, that her four white co panelist had not experienced. Some eyes gasped like gosh I didn’t think black females go though anything. Its crazy I thought Obama fixed all that. Ya’ll please stay woke.

The panel lasted at least 30-40 mins then we left. Her other panelist came up to talk to her.They discussed even though the con has made some stride in acknowledging that there are women of film, the playground isn’t very inclusive yet. When will it get to the point of getting rid of the gender divide and having panels of film makers in general instead of dividing them by chromosome differences.

The Ironic part about all of this the film maker posters were not on any of the walls unlike the other promotional posters.

This is Amerikkka.

We checked out the dealers room and I debated deep in my spirit was there anything I wanted to spend my money on. There wasn’t.

I did see Teddy Long from WWE tho, that was cool. Ted Raimi was there and England fangirled, as I stood there not judging. I literally just heard of him that day. For future reference, I didn”t watch a lot of movies and it concerns a lot of my friends.

She had a table to sell her merchandise, so for the next few hours we literally sat at the table, people watch and chill. Man some people had some impressive costumes, others just looked like they didn’t bathe.

I don’t apologize for talking shit about dirty people at cons, I don’t. Shit bothers me at anime and comic conventions. Literally one of the first things y’all are taught before your love of comics, anime, movies, video games or any type of hobbies in life is to wash your fucking ass. Ya’ll mother fuckas are nasty. Clean ya self, for the culture.

Tangent over, no wait. Fuck ya’ll dirty, stinky, and rancid bastards,

Ok, now it’s over.

When that was over we did a final walk around. One of the vendors in the merchant room worked on Star Trek and had his Emmy out. An actual fucking Emmy. I hope its magical creative energies flowed to me and my art flourishes with that extra magical boost.

Amen.

I think thats it.This another reason I didn’t want to wait a year to talk about this in case I forgot something. Ironically enough I probably did, HA.

Anyway to check out some of the cosplay images from the con of dirtiness and a legit fucking EMMY check them out here.

Anyway my hybrid ass is hungry, so this issue is over. Maybe next time we will go back to our regular schedule broadcast.Maybe.

Remember Magical Black People exist, don’t be afraid.

Shit I’m hungry.

Lemonading

04 Wednesday Apr 2018

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twin 19_preview

Dear Friends of Jano,

We now return to our regularly scheduled program.

Huh?

A series of flashbacks of my art journey since the summer of that fuck boy 2016.

OOOOOOOOH

Right now that my special issues are out of the way, we go back to where we left off. 2017.

Man, two thousand fucking seventeen. Holy fuck my niggas it was a legit a god damn motha fucking journey.

Was it as bad as 2016?

No, but I promise you it felt like an RPG at some point in this journey. Spoiler alert we will get to that in a few issues.

But for now we are gonna enjoy simple times and talk about the first photoshoot I did of last year. Spoiler Alert I got paid for it. YES LAWD * Anderson Paak voice. I could afford life for a brief moment in my continued unemployment stint.

One Friday night in January while I was watching YuYu Hakusho when right at Yusuke and Sensui were starting their battle, my phone went off. Hermit me was like who in blue hell is emailing me. It was my actress homegirl England Simpson. Her and her twin sister wanted to do a photoshoot, and the theme of it was to be similar to Beyonce’s Lemonade music video.

Ok so this may piss some people off (Oh well) but I don’t like Beyonce enough to keep up with her music. She is ok but do I care when she release something, nah not at all.

So I watch the Lemonade video to see what they want. Real Shit main thing I saw was a plantation. What? It couldn’t have been just me. Then went to my Bff Google to see if Charlotte has any plantations and holy fuck it does. Legit wasn’t ready for that. Damn the monuments of slavery still fucking exist along side systematic racism and oppression.

FIX IT OBAMA PLEASE!!

Remember when I said 2017 was a journey. Well this was the first part of the literally journey. Spoiler Alert, I drove around a lot last year scouting locations.

So I spent my Sunday plantation hunting, yes that was a legit a thing.

The first place was a pass and honestly not worth describing past this sentence. Place two, hot damn. I arrive and as soon as I pull into the property this old white meth face lady hits the gas and follows me like I am a runaway slave. At some point we both open our windows, I lead to ask her some questions. Her answer was basically leave nigger before I Lynch ya.

Well damn.

Then she drove to chase someone else down. Look Bitch if you don’t want people to visit, close the fucking gate to your low budget Candy Land. Points if you caught the Django reference. Should have burned that whole bitch down.

Place three was a legit charm, well despite the fact that it was a plantation. As much as I hate slavery, I legit never saw myself looking for a plantation. Anyway Latta Plantation was the location and it ddef had that old colonial vibe of Lynch a nigger, rape his wife and then raise the child to be a foot stool, Ding Ding Ding we had a winner. Thank you for still existing a racist ass testament to the dark ages.

I email my friends and tell them that we are all set, Kinda, turns out they would be closed on the day we wanted to shoot.

Fuck. But do I give them points for being closed on Martin Luther King Jr day? Nah cuz it is still fucking plantation.

We defaulted to Independence Park which is off Hawthorne Lane….not Independence Boulevard….wait what? Fuck it. Anyway nigga it was cold as fuck. I need to get that out the way before we continue to establish the setting of this narrative. England and Ingrid had their poses already worked out and how they wanted to go, which made the shoot go faster was fine since it was cold as fuck. Did I say it was as cold as fuck earlier? Just making sure. I think I had one idea I wanted them to bring to life but that was it, and I’m Kool with that.

And that’s all folks, we came back to my place and they picked out their photos as well what they wanted edit wise.

To see some of the pictures from that project, click here.

Real shit I would type more but I think I’m done now. I’m going to indulge myself in Final Fantasy 7 for the first time. I know I’m 20 years late with that. Same with me just now starting to listen to Incubus. Either are a good distraction from recent depression episodes and this existential crisis. Yeah those are loads of fun, not really.

Mad Monster Party 2018

04 Sunday Mar 2018

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Dear Friends of Jano,

Yo today was a legit chill ass fucking today, despite me waking up early as fuck on my day off.

I was like yo let me edit the pictures from my first Mad Monster Party, but first I need to watch something. I started the new DevilMan CryBaby series on Netflix, yo how come no one told me how nice this series is. My friends who watch anime and who didn’t tell me about it, ya’ll nuggas are on prohibition. Anyway after 2 episodes I decided to start work on the images, while listening Krizz Kaliko: Go and Hannibal Burress: Live from Chicago. Watched my shows, did my hair, chilled all day then just finished watched the latest Justice League Movie……it was ok, it wasn’t as horrible as I thought it was gonna be. Legit can’t deal with Ben Affleck as Batman, whose Mans is this that thought it would be a good idea to be Batman. HOW SWAY?!

Anyway the party.

So back in 2016(GRRSSSSSH that year), my actress home girl England Simpson, (Spoiler alert, I took her profile picture but we will talk about that later… no literally we will). told me about the Mad Monster Party and I was like word I wanna check it out one day.

Fast foward to February 17, 2018, she put me on the list to get in that day.

Yo I’ve never been on the list before, I felt so important in my life. I almost wanted to walk around with my meat out and swinging. Swoosh Swoosh nuggas.

Anyway.

I arrived at the Hilton and met up with her, at some point we made it down to where show floor. MAN so many people in cosplay, OMG. Like OMG. I low-keyed geeked out at some peoples outfits. Nigga, I saw Mick Foley at one of the tables, internally I was going oh shit.I’ve seen you on TV getting bruised, battered and beaten so many times and know you are right here in front of me.

Jano did you say that in front of him?

Fuck no, he would have beaten me worse than the people that have beat his ass over the years.

Anyway we walked around, and yo I’m not gonna lie my years of being a hermit gave me a bad case of hush mouth. I legit had trouble asking people for pictures. Yay for friends because England def helped me shoot my shot.

I was trying for a basketball reference, did it work.Nah ok. Moral of this part of the story I need to not let social anxiety stop me from getting photo worthy photos….best analogy I got right now, deal with it.

The show was pretty dope though. At some point her sister came and it was the three of us traversing the horror film fest grounds. We checked out the Cosplay beauty pageant and spoiler alert this girl I randomly I added on facebook a few years ago was hosting it. I was like I know that girl….not really.

Side note, I liked how many white people looked at us like what are you niggers doing here? Duh, enjoying our lives you Plumbus face diseased cunts.

Dear White People, just because you kill black people off first in horror movies doesn’t mean we won’t come to genre themed conventions. Spoiler alert we like this shit too.

Eventually we made it down to the movie premiere of Prelude: A Love Story. Spoiler Alert it was the movie England made with her sister Ingrid had produced, and which England starred in.

I liked it, there was one part which I thought was hilarious as fuck. Spoiler alert….nah I’m playing I don’t do spoilers for films especially if my friends made them. You’ll just have to wait and see.

I think thats it, to see some of the pictures I took go here on the internet.

Oh yeah one more thing.

Ya’ll listen.

If you ever find yourself in front of someone taking a picture of someone else, don’t just stand there in front of the lens. Move, as in Move Bitch Get outta the way Get outta the way bitch Get outta the way.

That stupid fucking cunt acne faced blonde ditz.

Ok that’s it, Im out.

Moonside Sound

23 Saturday Dec 2017

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jn36

Dear Friends of Jano,

Yo Real Shit I wanna pass back out after just waking up a few hours ago, never mind I kinda I have to so I can be in the cotton field in a few hours. Right now the only thing keeping me awake is listening to Hannibal Buress as I type this.  Damn it Spotify stop fragging up on me. Why are you like this?

So anyway since it’s the holidays and there was a period between September and November when my posting schedule got fragged cuz of adjustment to slavery and ain’t shit nigga fuckery. I decided to do another issue this month.

Fuck, I’m so fucking tired. Fuck.

Anyway where am I in this journey, oh yeah August 2016. Like I said a few issues ago I had this grand idea of a photo series about those with artistic abilities. Ya know acting, writing, music, etc. Most people had dropped out but luckily one of my friends was still able to do it. One of my boys I met when I was picking cotton.

Yeah, you read that right, picking cotton. Where? Everyone’s favorite plantation, IKEA. That nazi slave camp, but real shit I met some kool people in the process of shucking and jiving. Spoiler Alert, there will always be a strong slave solidarity against snobbish ass white people.

Anyway.

My fellow freed slave is Producer and Beat Maker Justin Nelms, who makes candy for your ears. Nigga when I say your ear drums will cum slowly from hearing his sounds that is not an exaggeration. If you like Nujabes then you will def like his material. Probably because he was born into a family of music. Genetics can be a good thing at time especially when said source material is augmented by dedication to your craft.

The photo session was insanely chill especially since I didn’t end up in pain like I did in the Scarlet Tracks issue. Unfortunately it was cut short because he had a deadline to meet but we def shot some good material within the time span we were allowed.  Despite that it was a good shoot and fun to see one of my fellow slaves free and enjoying life.

Some of the photos from said adventure are here. As for my friend check out his website here, his sound is definitely worth the money. And as with everything please don’t waste anyones time if you decide to work with him. Professionalism is key *inserts flashbacks*, man fuck 2016.

Anyway this is probably going to be the last issue for this year. Sucks right, I am working on Act 2 as we speak, well not currently as we speak because obviously I am working on this issue but you get the point. I am doing coloring videos on my instagram snap chat thingy from time to time, feel free to check that out. You ever see someone color to a soundtrack, no? Ok there ya go. Talk to ya in 2018, here’s hoping I won’t be so damn tired next issue. Meanwhile I’m gonna try to see the new Star Wars, Thor, and Justice League movies. Yeah I’m behind.

Oh yea, Fuck IKEA like 2016.

 

Ok now I’m done.

You’re welcome

04 Monday Jul 2016

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Greetings,

So it finally happened for a myriad of reasons I gave into my narcissim and named a website after myself. You are welcome world

*Bows to the world

Until Next Time

#Charlotte #Art #nerd #Photography #hybridart #Blerd #animeinspired #cltart #charlotteartist #mixedmedia  #introduction #newbeginings #JanoRyusaru